Wednesday, January 02, 2008

The Ugly Voice of Reason

Blaine: “All I’m saying is that it’s taking a really long time, and maybe we should explore some other options. ”

Kristie: “Wah-wah-wah” (imagine the sound of the teacher voice in the Charlie Brown movies.)

Blaine: “Well, no, just that we both thought you’d be done by now. At least with the first coat.”

Kristie: Charlie Brown voice.

Blaine: “Yes, I *know* that it’s not your fault that the kids are off on Christmas Break and don’t want to spend every day there. It’s also not your fault that the Home Depot guy was all liar liar pants on fire about the paint and primer and now it’s taking longer because you’re having to do three and four coats …. It’s just that, well …..”

Kristie: Charlie Brown voice.

Blaine: “I would help you if I could, but I can hardly take off work from my brand new job to do it during the day.”

Kristie: slightly cranky Charlie Brown voice

Blaine: “Of COURSE I think you’re doing a wonderful job --- the parts that are finished look great. You’re swell, honest! It’s just that …. Well …. We need to be realistic and weigh the cost vs. the savings.”

Kristie: Charlie Brown voice

Blaine: “You know, compare what we’re saving to what we’re losing. For every week you spend painting, that’s a week we can’t have renters in it, and another week we’re getting no rental income. So in the long run, the savings of not hiring a professional painter, and the time we’re losing, is costing us money.”

Kristie: Charlie Brown voice

Blaine: “No, it’s not that I think a professional painter could do it better, and certainly not with as much love and caring as you’re doing it, just that they would do it ….. well ….. faster. You’re slow.”

Deathly. Still. Total. Mutinous. Silence.

Blaine: “Ow! Ow! Stop hitting me with your freakishly overdeveloped arm muscles!!!”


Natalie said...

I'm not even allowed to paint. Eamonn says there's some sort of science to it. At least you got to try.

heartshapedhedges said...

I would have stopped half way through with a, "your right honey, Ill let you go ahead and hire a painter...." and considered it a giant score of getting out of a tedious project.

Got your Christmas card today...hope you got ours too (mailed to the GA address :/ )

Loralee Choate said...

I think I would cry tears of joy and happiness if my husband would LET ME HIRE ANYONE to do ANYTHING on our house.

You know, because he can "Do it".


Pam Doughty said...

Good God, Kristie... just cast your eyes unto the Heavens, thank God that you have a sensible mate, and ENJOY what little time you have left of the holidays!!! As a (very) seasoned rental owner, it truly does pay in the long run to let the pros do it. You can write it off, and your muscles will all be smooth and perfect (no blisters, sister....!). Give Blaine a HUGE hug, lay down the brush, and walk away..... :<)
Looking for an update about how you and the kids found joy at a) the local park b) a friend's house c) the MALL.. looking for pants.... !!!!

Monica H said...

My husband won't let me hire painters. I want to save money, he wants to sit back and watch someone else do it.

Monica H said...

oops, I mean *my husband won't let me paint. He wants to hire the painters*

tee hee :)

Anonymous said...

Mark could do it! I'm sure he would appreciate me offering him up, (ok, so I do it all the time!!!) but I could ask him if you didnt want to pay the full price of painters.


Amy said...

I don't understand why it took Blaine so long to figure out that you hate to paint and need to hire someone. My husband always goes on and on about how good of a job I'm doing so he doesn't have to lift a finger.
good luck!!

Anonymous said...

If only that conversation would happen at our house! Painting just sucks. And I don't care what they claim about the "one coat coverage". It's a flat out L.I.E.!!! This weekend, we painted our bedroom white over a "lovely" shade of taupe and it took primer plus three coats to cover and look decent....I'd be all for hiring the pros!


Grandma J said...

Take Blaine's advice. I don't know what the rental market is like in OK, or what the law requires but in CA you MUST paint between your espense. So depending on how long people stay put, and I'm sure it's at least a tad longer in OK, you could be painting often. Also, like Pam Doughty said, it's a tax write-off.
Now, go enjoy the last bit of Christmas vacation with the kids.
Happy New Year!!

Anonymous said...

I just love posts about Blaine - they are funny and I have to say "What a guy"!!!!


Anonymous said...

I use to HATE to paint - then I tried Kilz Paint - I love it and 1 coat will usually take care of it. Try it! They also have a great primer!

feefifoto said...

I've had that same lecture from my father about the time value of money so many times that I can effortlessly channel it for him, yet I still am all "I can do that..." until I give up in the middle and have to hire someone to counteract all my mistakes.