Day 47 OT
If I ever needed proof that my sister-in-law hates me, I got it today. Actually, I got it about a month ago when she sent all three children Wal-Mart Gift-Cards for Christmas.
Let me repeat, in case you didn’t catch that:
Wal-Mart. Gift-Cards. Children.
Are there any three words in the English language that when put together, can strike such fear and terror into the heart of parents? ESPECIALLY the parent who gets stuck taking them to spend the gift-cards???? Blaine and I flipped for it. He got off EASY, cleaning those toilets for the next three months, lucky bastard. And off I trudged, despondently, to Wal-Mart.
I don’t mean to slur the reputation of Wal-Marts world wide. Maybe it’s only the Wal-Mart here in our town that serves as the stomping grounds to every white trash hillbilly in a tri-county area. Night or day, rain or shine, the place is packed. Packed! Where do all these people come from?? Why do they bring young children in the store at 10 pm at night? Do they really NEED all that crap they’re buying? Why are so many of them in motorized scooters with little buggies on the front? Why are the check out lines always so long? Do these people actually LIKE shopping at Wal-Mart?? And today (sigh) I had to join the masses, to spend these gift-cards that had been burning a hole in my kids’ pockets ever since the holidays.
In an effort to make our after-school shopping trip as painless as possible, and allow me to keep my sanity, I laid down a few simple ground rules:
1. Any child who fights, whines, argues, pouts, or bickers, with me OR with his/her siblings, will have every item they have chosen put back on the shelf and they will go home empty-handed.
2. Each child must have one hand on the cart at all times (Even though I *know* my kids aren’t going to be snatched away from me, let’s face it …. Every urban legend about child abduction takes place at a Wal-Mart, doesn’t it?? And I’m certainly not immune to the panic those stories create.)
3. Any child who wanders off and does not stay in the same aisle as me will lose all shopping privileges for the day. Plus I will beat them when we get home.
4. If you want an item, you better make your decision and pick it up. Because I am not wandering over the hundred-acre countryside that is Wal-Mart, back and forth and back and forth and back and forth, while you change your mind twelve times about what you really want and try to maneuver me from the toy section to the music section to the sporting goods section and back to the toy section again.
5. NO!! We will NOT be buying candy at the end!!
I took a deep breath, and off we went. Miraculously, we made it through the parking lot, which so many of the shoppers confuse for a Nascar speedway, and into the store without bodily harm.
Immediately, I realized there was a problem with rule #2. When you’ve got three kids hanging on to the cart, all wanting to go in different directions, it’s really hard to steer. So we quickly revamped #2 to “must be within eye sight of the cart at all times.” Very similar to rule #3, but I am nothing if not flexible.
First, to the grocery department because we were out of milk at home. And I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend half an hour in Wal Mart and forget the milk at the end! So, milk first.
Second, to the music department, the first stop in the strategic loop of the store. I am only making ONE loop, and there will be NO back-tracking!
Brayden is obsessed with purchasing Kids Bop 9. Sadly, Wal-Mart only carries Kids Bop 1-8. So she chooses yet another Star Wars soundtrack (don’t even ask me what is up with that) and is relatively content.
Next, the disposable camera bin in front of the electronics department. Brayden claims to want one, so I put it in the cart. Then, several aisles later, she realized that the camera combined with the CD means all her money is gone, so she’s backpedaling, fast. Kendrie says she’ll take the camera ….. but then changes her mind. Raising my voice and telling the two of them that “This is the one and the ONLY time I will put it back once we’ve left the department”, I sneakily and deceitfully put the camera on a shelf in Housewares. I hate people who do that. See what Wal-Mart has reduced me to???
Then, it’s sporting goods, where Kellen has to fondle every football in the department, before deciding he doesn’t want a football, or any kind of ball, at all. Rushing them past the protective cups before they start asking questions. And explaining to Kendrie that even combining the three gift cards will not be enough to buy them the trampoline she wants so badly. Then, moving on.
At long last, over to toys. Here’s where images of Dante’s Inferno are brought to mind, as I try to navigate my way through this section, with one kid who wants to be in the Star Wars aisle, one kid in the Bratz aisle, and one kid in whatever aisle carries the swords and weapons. Reminding the kids five hundred times that there are other shoppers who need to get through the aisle with their carts, as well, so would you please move over and quit standing in the middle of the aisle??? Although they grumbled about rule #2, modified, they did indeed stay within eye sight of the cart, even if it meant spending twenty minutes waiting for Brayden to decide between Cloe’s or Yasmine’s Bratz Head. Waiting ten minutes while Kendrie searched high and low for an Annikan Skywalker ANYTHING, sadly disappointed. Waiting while Kellen pondered the choice between a cheesy plastic bow and arrow, or a cheesy plastic combat set. Then, in order to finish off the gift cards, because Lord knows I’m not coming back to Wal-Mart for a return visit, we head to the .88 cent aisle, where the kids have to personally inspect every piece of crap they think looks good. Or squeezy. Or even remotely interesting.
Can you believe Kendrie bought another whoopee cushion?
Finally, FINALLY, after spending half my life in toys, we head to the check out line, where Brayden sees, of all things, another disposable camera display and decides the world will stop turning if she doesn’t get one. And my heart drops to my stomach when Kellen pays and I realize he still has 92 cents left on his card ….. man, I hope he doesn’t figure that one out.
So, an HOUR AND TEN MINUTES LATER, we are back in the van, headed for home. I am exhausted. Do people actually do this sort of thing for fun? I mean, I only have three kids, and they were relatively well-behaved, for a change. But I had no choice. Damn cards. But I saw people there who I think were just spending money for the fun of it. Going to Wal-Mart by choice, not being forced as I was. Who does that????
Now, give me a quiet morning in Target, by myself, and I can browse with the best of them. But joining the fray that is Wal-Mart, in the middle of the day, with three kids, is just craziness talking. In fact, I think I might have a little PTSD at the moment. I should probably go find a jar of chocolate fudge sauce and unwind.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Sunday, January 29, 2006
SMUG JUSTIFICATION
Day 45 OT
Kendrie lost her second tooth today. After jutting out at an obscene and vaguely disturbing angle for the past week or so, it finally gave way to all the pulling and poking and prodding that has been done. It’s amazing how a tiny little tooth like that can hold on for so long. But at long last, it came out.
And when it did, it was perfect. Small, white, gleaming. Pristine. No sign of cavity, crack or crater. No erosion of the enamel. And do you know why?
Because I am a perfect mother. One who doesn’t subject her children to un-necessary sugar consumption. One who would hide in the laundry room, finishing off the jar of chocolate fudge sauce herself rather than risk exposing her innocent babies to a lifetime of dental decay. See? SEE? See what I endure for the sake of these kids??? The personal sacrifice on my part?
****If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go back and read the previous journal entry.
Feeling smugly justified,
Kristie
******************************************
OREO ICE CREAM DESSERT:
One big bag Oreos
One stick butter
One half gallon vanilla ice cream*
One large jar chocolate fudge sauce**
One large tub Cool Whip
Crush/chop Oreos (leaving the filling in) and mix with one stick melted butter (leaving a few crushed Oreos in reserve). Spread in bottom of 13x9 pan as “crust” then place in freezer for ten minutes to harden. The next layer is the ice cream. It’s easiest to buy it in the rectangle container, then use an electric knife to cut it into slabs. Place over crust, making the layer as even as possible. The next layer is the hot fudge ….. then put back in the freezer to allow the fudge to firm up a bit. The next layer is the Cool Whip, then sprinkle the reserve Oreos on for looks. Keep frozen until ready to serve.
Another version calls for using Nutter Butters instead of Oreos, caramel sauce instead of hot fudge, and adding in a layer of peanuts.
*The original recipe called for Coffee flavored ice cream (blech!) I’ve also made it with Mint Chocolate Chip, which is good. Use your imagination!
**If you want to be a good mom, hide in the laundry room with any unused fudge and eat it all yourself. Do NOT share with your children. Their teeth and their dentist will thank you later.
Kendrie lost her second tooth today. After jutting out at an obscene and vaguely disturbing angle for the past week or so, it finally gave way to all the pulling and poking and prodding that has been done. It’s amazing how a tiny little tooth like that can hold on for so long. But at long last, it came out.
And when it did, it was perfect. Small, white, gleaming. Pristine. No sign of cavity, crack or crater. No erosion of the enamel. And do you know why?
Because I am a perfect mother. One who doesn’t subject her children to un-necessary sugar consumption. One who would hide in the laundry room, finishing off the jar of chocolate fudge sauce herself rather than risk exposing her innocent babies to a lifetime of dental decay. See? SEE? See what I endure for the sake of these kids??? The personal sacrifice on my part?
****If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go back and read the previous journal entry.
Feeling smugly justified,
Kristie
******************************************
OREO ICE CREAM DESSERT:
One big bag Oreos
One stick butter
One half gallon vanilla ice cream*
One large jar chocolate fudge sauce**
One large tub Cool Whip
Crush/chop Oreos (leaving the filling in) and mix with one stick melted butter (leaving a few crushed Oreos in reserve). Spread in bottom of 13x9 pan as “crust” then place in freezer for ten minutes to harden. The next layer is the ice cream. It’s easiest to buy it in the rectangle container, then use an electric knife to cut it into slabs. Place over crust, making the layer as even as possible. The next layer is the hot fudge ….. then put back in the freezer to allow the fudge to firm up a bit. The next layer is the Cool Whip, then sprinkle the reserve Oreos on for looks. Keep frozen until ready to serve.
Another version calls for using Nutter Butters instead of Oreos, caramel sauce instead of hot fudge, and adding in a layer of peanuts.
*The original recipe called for Coffee flavored ice cream (blech!) I’ve also made it with Mint Chocolate Chip, which is good. Use your imagination!
**If you want to be a good mom, hide in the laundry room with any unused fudge and eat it all yourself. Do NOT share with your children. Their teeth and their dentist will thank you later.
Friday, January 27, 2006
I HAVE DONE A BAD THING, AND SHOULD FEEL GUILTY.
THE OPERATIVE WORD BEING “SHOULD”
Day 43 OT
I have done a bad thing. Not felony bad. Not penance and rosary bad (especially considering I’m not even Catholic). But slightly-feel-guilty-as-a-mother bad.
We were invited to a friend’s house for dinner tonight. I offered to bring dessert. I have a pretty yummy Oreo Ice Cream Dessert that is usually a success, so I went to Kroger today to buy the ingredients: Oreos (big surprise), butter, vanilla ice cream, one large container Cool Whip, and one large jar of chocolate fudge sauce. Only Kroger didn’t have any large jars of chocolate fudge. If you know me, you know the chocolate fudge is the most crucial part of any recipe. Not one to take chances, I covered my bases by buying two medium jars, to make sure I had enough to ensure proper fudginess of the dessert. I am nothing if not prudent.
Sure enough, while making the dessert after picking the kids up from school, I discovered I had too much fudge. No crises there, I had several choices. Re-cap the left-over fudge and put it in the fridge for some other time, yell for the kids to come in the kitchen and give them each a spoonful of fudge as a treat (that is the option that a good parent would have chosen, in my opinion) or just pitch the leftover fudge in the trash. Can you guess which option I chose?
That’s right, Option D, none of the above: I hid in the laundry room and ate the rest of the jar all by myself, without sharing. At all. With anyone.
I should feel guilt. I should feel shame. I should feel gluttonous. Actually, I do feel a little nauseous from the sugar high, from which I am currently crashing. The real irony is that I made my kids eat fruit for an after-school snack, insisting there weren’t enough Oreos left for them to have any.
But all told, no real guilt. Nope, none at all. Not one bit.
Fudge, anyone?
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
PROOF THAT DISNEY IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL
Day 41 OT
Ok, so maybe I don’t have PROOF-proof, unless you count the brains splattered on the windshield of my van from when my head exploded this morning during the drive to school.
Did anyone else, with kids under the age of 12 or so, have to endure the High School Musical Disney Countdown last Friday night? I mean, the hoopla leading up to this magnificent event would have led you to believe its importance rivaled the birth of the baby Jesus, or something. And Disney didn’t help matters either, by beginning the previews, oh, about last October, for Pete’s sake. My kids were more excited for the premiere of High School Musical (“Premieres at 8 o’clock, 7 o’clock central, Mom!!!”) than they were for Christmas. One good thing to come out of it was that I was able to get 48 hours excellent behavior out of all three of them, just by threatening that anyone who argued, whined, pouted, sulked, fought, or so much as breathed funny would be sent to their rooms, at precisely 8 o’clock, 7 o’clock central. So I guess I should thank the marketing wizards at Disney for that. And maybe it even helped them with their time-telling skills, considering there was a countdown timer in the right hand corner of the tv screen all day. Who knows?
But we watched it as a family, and were appropriately impressed with our children’s sing-along abilities, and Kendrie’s break-dancing talent, that she insisted on showing us during this song (that is playing now) which is her new favorite song. We laughed, we cried, we cheered as Troy and Gabriella overcame seemingly insurmountable obstacles in order to fulfill their destinies of starring in the Twinkletown Musical ….. you get the picture.
In case you were one of the lucky few who didn’t actually see the show (it’s really not that bad, as much as I’m making fun of it) it’s about a star basketball player and a “brainiac” who decide they want to try out for the school musical, much to the chagrin of their friends, team-mates, and families. According to the friends and team-mates, everyone has one thing they are good at, only one. To attempt doing anything else will apparently irrevocably alter the order and harmony of the universe. Or something like that.
The co-captain of the basketball team is especially offended, and thinks Troy is jeopardizing the team’s chances of winning the championship game, by not focusing on the team and thinking of the musical tryouts instead. He’s obviously never head of multi-tasking, or seen a mother cook dinner, help with homework, bathe the dog, and fold a load of laundry, all at the same time.
So anyway, long explanation notwithstanding for me to get to the point!!! The message the basketball players are trying to give this guy is “Stick with what you know, go with the flow”, ie, don’t mess up the one thing you do well by trying to do something new. There’s a big musical number in the cafeteria to this effect, and that is what leads me to my conversation with Kendrie this morning. It was actually the third or fourth time we’ve had this conversation since she saw the show last Friday. It goes pretty much like this:
Kendrie: “Mom, I have a question about High School Musical”
Kristie: (rolling eyes, thinking Dear Lord, here we go again) “Yes, sweetie, what is it?”
Kendrie: “You know how in the cafeteria, and the basketball team is being so mean to Troy, telling him he can only do one thing?”
Kristie: “mmm-hmmm” (Yep, here it comes)
Kendrie: “Well, were they really being mean, or were they just pretending?”
Kristie: “Well, in the show they were really being mean. But you know that they are all actors, and it’s just a movie, so really they were just pretending.”
Kendrie: “So they weren’t being mean?”
Kristie: “Well, they were pretending to be mean”
Kendrie: “So they really WERE being mean?”
Kristie: (getting a little exasperated) “They were *supposed* to be mean when they were acting. But it’s all pretend.”
Kendrie” “Because they were acting pretty mean.”
Kristie: “Yes, that’s what they want you to think.”
Kendrie: “So for real, truly, they were being mean?”
Kristie: “Well, yes. But only in the movie. I’m sure they’re not mean in real life.”
Kendrie: “You don’t understand what I’m asking you!!!” (getting very upset)
Kristie: (breathing tightly through nose … wondering who that Job character is and if I can borrow some of his patience) “No, I guess I don’t. Ask me again so I can understand and try to explain better.”
Kendrie: (gathers thoughts, tries a new tactic) “Well, ok. In the cafeteria, were they ***really*** being mean, or just pretending to be mean???”
Oh, dear God, and it just goes on and on and never stops!
Does ANYONE understand what she’s asking me? I'm actually looking forward to our little talk about the birds and the bees in a few years, as I can't help but think that it's gotta be easier than this!
Ok, so maybe I don’t have PROOF-proof, unless you count the brains splattered on the windshield of my van from when my head exploded this morning during the drive to school.
Did anyone else, with kids under the age of 12 or so, have to endure the High School Musical Disney Countdown last Friday night? I mean, the hoopla leading up to this magnificent event would have led you to believe its importance rivaled the birth of the baby Jesus, or something. And Disney didn’t help matters either, by beginning the previews, oh, about last October, for Pete’s sake. My kids were more excited for the premiere of High School Musical (“Premieres at 8 o’clock, 7 o’clock central, Mom!!!”) than they were for Christmas. One good thing to come out of it was that I was able to get 48 hours excellent behavior out of all three of them, just by threatening that anyone who argued, whined, pouted, sulked, fought, or so much as breathed funny would be sent to their rooms, at precisely 8 o’clock, 7 o’clock central. So I guess I should thank the marketing wizards at Disney for that. And maybe it even helped them with their time-telling skills, considering there was a countdown timer in the right hand corner of the tv screen all day. Who knows?
But we watched it as a family, and were appropriately impressed with our children’s sing-along abilities, and Kendrie’s break-dancing talent, that she insisted on showing us during this song (that is playing now) which is her new favorite song. We laughed, we cried, we cheered as Troy and Gabriella overcame seemingly insurmountable obstacles in order to fulfill their destinies of starring in the Twinkletown Musical ….. you get the picture.
In case you were one of the lucky few who didn’t actually see the show (it’s really not that bad, as much as I’m making fun of it) it’s about a star basketball player and a “brainiac” who decide they want to try out for the school musical, much to the chagrin of their friends, team-mates, and families. According to the friends and team-mates, everyone has one thing they are good at, only one. To attempt doing anything else will apparently irrevocably alter the order and harmony of the universe. Or something like that.
The co-captain of the basketball team is especially offended, and thinks Troy is jeopardizing the team’s chances of winning the championship game, by not focusing on the team and thinking of the musical tryouts instead. He’s obviously never head of multi-tasking, or seen a mother cook dinner, help with homework, bathe the dog, and fold a load of laundry, all at the same time.
So anyway, long explanation notwithstanding for me to get to the point!!! The message the basketball players are trying to give this guy is “Stick with what you know, go with the flow”, ie, don’t mess up the one thing you do well by trying to do something new. There’s a big musical number in the cafeteria to this effect, and that is what leads me to my conversation with Kendrie this morning. It was actually the third or fourth time we’ve had this conversation since she saw the show last Friday. It goes pretty much like this:
Kendrie: “Mom, I have a question about High School Musical”
Kristie: (rolling eyes, thinking Dear Lord, here we go again) “Yes, sweetie, what is it?”
Kendrie: “You know how in the cafeteria, and the basketball team is being so mean to Troy, telling him he can only do one thing?”
Kristie: “mmm-hmmm” (Yep, here it comes)
Kendrie: “Well, were they really being mean, or were they just pretending?”
Kristie: “Well, in the show they were really being mean. But you know that they are all actors, and it’s just a movie, so really they were just pretending.”
Kendrie: “So they weren’t being mean?”
Kristie: “Well, they were pretending to be mean”
Kendrie: “So they really WERE being mean?”
Kristie: (getting a little exasperated) “They were *supposed* to be mean when they were acting. But it’s all pretend.”
Kendrie” “Because they were acting pretty mean.”
Kristie: “Yes, that’s what they want you to think.”
Kendrie: “So for real, truly, they were being mean?”
Kristie: “Well, yes. But only in the movie. I’m sure they’re not mean in real life.”
Kendrie: “You don’t understand what I’m asking you!!!” (getting very upset)
Kristie: (breathing tightly through nose … wondering who that Job character is and if I can borrow some of his patience) “No, I guess I don’t. Ask me again so I can understand and try to explain better.”
Kendrie: (gathers thoughts, tries a new tactic) “Well, ok. In the cafeteria, were they ***really*** being mean, or just pretending to be mean???”
Oh, dear God, and it just goes on and on and never stops!
Does ANYONE understand what she’s asking me? I'm actually looking forward to our little talk about the birds and the bees in a few years, as I can't help but think that it's gotta be easier than this!
Sunday, January 22, 2006
I WANNA DRIVE THE ZAMBONI!!
Day 38 OT
Well, I only need three words to sum up the experience we had on Saturday night:
Ho. Ly. Cow!
Wow, what an evening we had! And of course, as you all know, I’m not able to answer even a “yes or no” question in only three words, so let me go ahead and give you all the details!
We got an invitation from the Georgia chapter of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society about two weeks ago to attend an Atlanta Thrashers Hockey Game as part of their All-Star Kids Initiative, a program designed to support the NHL’s Hockey Fights Cancer charitable program. I won’t go into great detail, but you can find more information on this wonderful program at Hockey's All-Star Kids.
Now, I am the first to admit that we’ve gotten to do some pretty neat things due to Kendrie’s leukemia. We’ve attended Camp Sunshine Family Camp Weekends, the Lighthouse Family Retreat, Give Kids the World Village, Light the Night, attended a Braves game with CureSearch, attended the CURE Family Picnic, and various other activities as well. I’ve said it before …. I’d much rather have sat at home watching Lizzie McGuire re-runs, with three healthy kids, but it didn’t work out that way. So I feel very blessed that so many organizations work so hard to offer these programs, and very fortunate that our family has been able to take part.
So, ok. Back to the hockey game. Not only did the LLS invite our family to attend the game, but Terri with LLS wanted to know if Kendrie would be interested in helping throw down the puck before the game! Wow, are you kidding?? Seriously??? Would she be interested??? ------- Um, what exactly does that mean? See, what I know about basketball could fit in a thimble, and I know even less about hockey.
Plus, my mind immediately leapt to last summer’s grand opening of Tooner Park at Turner Field before the Braves game, where Kendrie was supposed to stand on stage while the ceremonial ribbon was being cut. She didn’t have to touch the scissors, or do anything more than stand there with a group of about fifteen other kids, and she wimped out. Total chicken. And now we’re asking her to step out on the ice before the Thrashers game, in front of 15,000 or so screaming hockey fans, and actually **DO** something?????
So I told Terri that while I appreciated the invitation, I had a more-than-slight concern that she might back out at the last second and I didn’t want to take any chances on messing up the big event …. I thought it might be safer to find another kid. But Kendrie insisted she wanted to do it, and Terri was a good sport about it, so with some hesitation, we accepted.
Fast forward to last night’s game.
First, we received premium parking passes and were able to get into the stadium half an hour before the general public to take advantage of all the cool, free, kid-friendly things that were happening. I felt quite smug walking past all the fans standing outside in the rain, as we munched on free popcorn and ice cream.
We were supposed to meet at our seats at 6:15, but weren’t quite sure where they were, so we asked for directions. I knew there would be a group of us sitting together, so I was sort of hoping for one of those boxes that companies sometimes reserve. But instead of going down near the ice, we were taken up, up, up; rode in an elevator that had an official button-pusher-person, and then were told to check in for our suite so it could be unlocked for us …. Blaine and I just sort of looked at each other. Suite? Unlocked?? Were we in the right place?
Then, they showed us to the suite and I knew for sure that they had us confused with Donald Trump!
Kellen’s first comment was, “Hey, this is nicer than any of the hotels we’ve ever stayed at!” Boasting a fridge, ice maker, wet bar, with food and beverage bar already set up, you’re right, son! Sofas, tables, tv screens, and seats that jutted out over the rest of the arena …. Let’s just say that our three-dollar general-seating tickets to the ball games back home won’t ever be the same!
Apparently we were in the private suite of one of the Atlanta players, Ilya Kovalchuk. Now, I have no idea who that is, but maybe this picture of him as a bobble head that they were passing out last night will help:
I did a little online research to find out more about him …. All I know now is that he was born in Russia (oh yeah, with a name like *Kovalchuk* I thought he must be from Iowa!) and that he was born in 1983. Blaine and I were extremely depressed to realize he hadn’t even been born when we graduated from high school, yet probably made more money last year alone than we’ll ever make in our lives. Oh, well. Whatever.
I was told that he owns (rents?) the suite for the entire season and sometimes when he’s not using it personally, he’ll give the seats away to organizations, like he did for the LLS last night. So while I still know nothing about him, I think that is a wonderful thing to do.
We sat around for about half an hour, the kids gluttonously-fascinated by the hot dogs, sandwiches, chips, chicken tenders, cookies and soda that was all just there for the taking. (Honestly, it was a little embarrassing. You’d think I never fed them at home.) The other cancer-kid who was going to help drop the puck, a cute 6-yr old lymphoma-survivor named Flynn, showed up and soon it was time to head downstairs.
We had been talking this event up for the past two weeks with Kendrie, making sure she understood what was going on and that she was still excited (and more importantly, WILLING!) to do it. She purported great enthusiasm in the days beforehand, and again in the suite, but began wilting on the way down to the ice. She wanted to hold my hand, then she wanted me to carry her, then she was burying her face in my leg and with only a few minutes to go, it was all-out tears and protestations that she was NEVER going out on the ice!!! “It’s too scary!” “There are too many people!” “What if the players accidentally smack me with their sticks when I’m out there?”
I, of course, ran the good-mothering gamut of responses, from “It’s ok, honey, mommy will be right behind you” to “You’ve been so brave to fight cancer, I just know you are brave enough to do this, also” to “Kendrie, sweetie, it’s not going to be that bad” to “Get your butt out on that ice right now, young lady, you said you would do it and you’re going to!”
Thankfully, the representatives from LLS and the Thrashers were extremely patient and encouraging, and she actually sucked it up and agreed to go out there, but only if I could stand right beside her. So we waited for a few minutes in the penalty box while the lights were flashing all around, and the music was blaring, and the players took to the ice while the crowd roared all around us. I was worried all these things would start to overwhelm her, but exactly the opposite happened. Flynn was standing there, calm as a cucumber, and I guess Kendrie decided this was pretty stinking cool after all! And hey, if HE could do it, surely she could, too! She leaned over when it was time, grabbed hold of her side of the puck, and marched right out there without a backward glance at me! (Which, of course, left me standing there looking pretty stupid, but I guess it was worth it.)
Being introduced to the sold-out crowd at Philips Arena, and meeting the players. I asked her if they said hello to her, and she said, “No, they said ‘Pleased to meet you’ “ I don’t know why that struck me as funny, but it did.
Tossing down the puck for the team representatives to swat at. After, she and Flynn were both given actual NHL pucks as keepsakes, which was extremely awesome in her book. PS. I have to give Blaine kudos for getting these pictures. He and Brayden and Kellen were still up in the suite, and he grabbed my camera with my mamba-jamba telephoto lens, and did a pretty good job, if I say so myself!
Then, when we were walking back through the “backstage” area to head back to our seats, there was a lady who was kind enough to “recognize” Kendrie and tell her what a great job she had done and ask her for her autograph. I’m sure I’ll never see her again, but if I did, I would tell her thank you for doing such a nice, un-necessary thing. You should have seen how proud Kendrie was to put her John Hancock on that lady’s ticket.
Funny thing, though. Later in the game there was a private autograph session for the All-Star Kids with Bobby Holik, an Atlanta player on injured-reserve. When we told Kendrie it was time for the autograph session, she assumed *he* must want *her* autograph and took her pen with her. She asked me, “Mom, why are all these kids here? Do they ALL want mine and Flynn’s autographs?” I had to explain to her that it was actually the other way around, and she was supposed to be happy to be on the receiving end!
Shortly after the Thrashers Mascot made a private appearance in our suite, thrilling all the kids (and a few adults as well!) it was time for us to go.
We had eaten all the free food, drunk all the free sodas, gathered our bobble heads, pucks, jerseys, autographed items, blow-up hockey sticks and Thrashers bracelets that we could carry. We staggered under the weight back to the van, with smiles on our faces the whole way.
Considering I don’t even understand hockey, and the Thrashers got beat, it was still a remarkable evening. From the amazing hospitality we were shown, to the pride I felt when Kendrie conquered her nerves and stepped out on that ice, it was a night to remember.
Many. Many thanks to Terri with LLS, the Atlanta Thrashers, and Ilya Kovalchuk for their graciousness. I’m sure every All-Star Kid there had just as wonderful of a time as we did.
Well, I only need three words to sum up the experience we had on Saturday night:
Ho. Ly. Cow!
Wow, what an evening we had! And of course, as you all know, I’m not able to answer even a “yes or no” question in only three words, so let me go ahead and give you all the details!
We got an invitation from the Georgia chapter of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society about two weeks ago to attend an Atlanta Thrashers Hockey Game as part of their All-Star Kids Initiative, a program designed to support the NHL’s Hockey Fights Cancer charitable program. I won’t go into great detail, but you can find more information on this wonderful program at Hockey's All-Star Kids.
Now, I am the first to admit that we’ve gotten to do some pretty neat things due to Kendrie’s leukemia. We’ve attended Camp Sunshine Family Camp Weekends, the Lighthouse Family Retreat, Give Kids the World Village, Light the Night, attended a Braves game with CureSearch, attended the CURE Family Picnic, and various other activities as well. I’ve said it before …. I’d much rather have sat at home watching Lizzie McGuire re-runs, with three healthy kids, but it didn’t work out that way. So I feel very blessed that so many organizations work so hard to offer these programs, and very fortunate that our family has been able to take part.
So, ok. Back to the hockey game. Not only did the LLS invite our family to attend the game, but Terri with LLS wanted to know if Kendrie would be interested in helping throw down the puck before the game! Wow, are you kidding?? Seriously??? Would she be interested??? ------- Um, what exactly does that mean? See, what I know about basketball could fit in a thimble, and I know even less about hockey.
Plus, my mind immediately leapt to last summer’s grand opening of Tooner Park at Turner Field before the Braves game, where Kendrie was supposed to stand on stage while the ceremonial ribbon was being cut. She didn’t have to touch the scissors, or do anything more than stand there with a group of about fifteen other kids, and she wimped out. Total chicken. And now we’re asking her to step out on the ice before the Thrashers game, in front of 15,000 or so screaming hockey fans, and actually **DO** something?????
So I told Terri that while I appreciated the invitation, I had a more-than-slight concern that she might back out at the last second and I didn’t want to take any chances on messing up the big event …. I thought it might be safer to find another kid. But Kendrie insisted she wanted to do it, and Terri was a good sport about it, so with some hesitation, we accepted.
Fast forward to last night’s game.
First, we received premium parking passes and were able to get into the stadium half an hour before the general public to take advantage of all the cool, free, kid-friendly things that were happening. I felt quite smug walking past all the fans standing outside in the rain, as we munched on free popcorn and ice cream.
We were supposed to meet at our seats at 6:15, but weren’t quite sure where they were, so we asked for directions. I knew there would be a group of us sitting together, so I was sort of hoping for one of those boxes that companies sometimes reserve. But instead of going down near the ice, we were taken up, up, up; rode in an elevator that had an official button-pusher-person, and then were told to check in for our suite so it could be unlocked for us …. Blaine and I just sort of looked at each other. Suite? Unlocked?? Were we in the right place?
Then, they showed us to the suite and I knew for sure that they had us confused with Donald Trump!
Kellen’s first comment was, “Hey, this is nicer than any of the hotels we’ve ever stayed at!” Boasting a fridge, ice maker, wet bar, with food and beverage bar already set up, you’re right, son! Sofas, tables, tv screens, and seats that jutted out over the rest of the arena …. Let’s just say that our three-dollar general-seating tickets to the ball games back home won’t ever be the same!
Apparently we were in the private suite of one of the Atlanta players, Ilya Kovalchuk. Now, I have no idea who that is, but maybe this picture of him as a bobble head that they were passing out last night will help:
I did a little online research to find out more about him …. All I know now is that he was born in Russia (oh yeah, with a name like *Kovalchuk* I thought he must be from Iowa!) and that he was born in 1983. Blaine and I were extremely depressed to realize he hadn’t even been born when we graduated from high school, yet probably made more money last year alone than we’ll ever make in our lives. Oh, well. Whatever.
I was told that he owns (rents?) the suite for the entire season and sometimes when he’s not using it personally, he’ll give the seats away to organizations, like he did for the LLS last night. So while I still know nothing about him, I think that is a wonderful thing to do.
We sat around for about half an hour, the kids gluttonously-fascinated by the hot dogs, sandwiches, chips, chicken tenders, cookies and soda that was all just there for the taking. (Honestly, it was a little embarrassing. You’d think I never fed them at home.) The other cancer-kid who was going to help drop the puck, a cute 6-yr old lymphoma-survivor named Flynn, showed up and soon it was time to head downstairs.
We had been talking this event up for the past two weeks with Kendrie, making sure she understood what was going on and that she was still excited (and more importantly, WILLING!) to do it. She purported great enthusiasm in the days beforehand, and again in the suite, but began wilting on the way down to the ice. She wanted to hold my hand, then she wanted me to carry her, then she was burying her face in my leg and with only a few minutes to go, it was all-out tears and protestations that she was NEVER going out on the ice!!! “It’s too scary!” “There are too many people!” “What if the players accidentally smack me with their sticks when I’m out there?”
I, of course, ran the good-mothering gamut of responses, from “It’s ok, honey, mommy will be right behind you” to “You’ve been so brave to fight cancer, I just know you are brave enough to do this, also” to “Kendrie, sweetie, it’s not going to be that bad” to “Get your butt out on that ice right now, young lady, you said you would do it and you’re going to!”
Thankfully, the representatives from LLS and the Thrashers were extremely patient and encouraging, and she actually sucked it up and agreed to go out there, but only if I could stand right beside her. So we waited for a few minutes in the penalty box while the lights were flashing all around, and the music was blaring, and the players took to the ice while the crowd roared all around us. I was worried all these things would start to overwhelm her, but exactly the opposite happened. Flynn was standing there, calm as a cucumber, and I guess Kendrie decided this was pretty stinking cool after all! And hey, if HE could do it, surely she could, too! She leaned over when it was time, grabbed hold of her side of the puck, and marched right out there without a backward glance at me! (Which, of course, left me standing there looking pretty stupid, but I guess it was worth it.)
Being introduced to the sold-out crowd at Philips Arena, and meeting the players. I asked her if they said hello to her, and she said, “No, they said ‘Pleased to meet you’ “ I don’t know why that struck me as funny, but it did.
Tossing down the puck for the team representatives to swat at. After, she and Flynn were both given actual NHL pucks as keepsakes, which was extremely awesome in her book. PS. I have to give Blaine kudos for getting these pictures. He and Brayden and Kellen were still up in the suite, and he grabbed my camera with my mamba-jamba telephoto lens, and did a pretty good job, if I say so myself!
Then, when we were walking back through the “backstage” area to head back to our seats, there was a lady who was kind enough to “recognize” Kendrie and tell her what a great job she had done and ask her for her autograph. I’m sure I’ll never see her again, but if I did, I would tell her thank you for doing such a nice, un-necessary thing. You should have seen how proud Kendrie was to put her John Hancock on that lady’s ticket.
Funny thing, though. Later in the game there was a private autograph session for the All-Star Kids with Bobby Holik, an Atlanta player on injured-reserve. When we told Kendrie it was time for the autograph session, she assumed *he* must want *her* autograph and took her pen with her. She asked me, “Mom, why are all these kids here? Do they ALL want mine and Flynn’s autographs?” I had to explain to her that it was actually the other way around, and she was supposed to be happy to be on the receiving end!
Shortly after the Thrashers Mascot made a private appearance in our suite, thrilling all the kids (and a few adults as well!) it was time for us to go.
We had eaten all the free food, drunk all the free sodas, gathered our bobble heads, pucks, jerseys, autographed items, blow-up hockey sticks and Thrashers bracelets that we could carry. We staggered under the weight back to the van, with smiles on our faces the whole way.
Considering I don’t even understand hockey, and the Thrashers got beat, it was still a remarkable evening. From the amazing hospitality we were shown, to the pride I felt when Kendrie conquered her nerves and stepped out on that ice, it was a night to remember.
Many. Many thanks to Terri with LLS, the Atlanta Thrashers, and Ilya Kovalchuk for their graciousness. I’m sure every All-Star Kid there had just as wonderful of a time as we did.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
YET ANOTHER WAY……
Day 35 OT
Yet another way my children differ from me, in the same vein as athletic ambition, is their bizarre-o desire to exercise. They think it’s fun. What’s up with that????
Anyway, we were watching my girlfriend Renee’s two sons the other night while she and her husband were at the Bon Jovi concert (yeah, see? Standing on my chair, waving a cigarette lighter in the air, and ogling Ritchie Sambora, that’s my kind of exercise!) and the kids decided they wanted to have an “Exercise Contest”. As long as they didn’t expect ME to take part, I agreed to humor them and serve as the Exercise Judge. I’m still not exactly sure what my duties were, since basically they just jumped around the living room, screaming “Watch me! Watch me!” before colliding with one another and then falling down and laughing hysterically. (Confirms my personal suspicion that endorphins are actually NOT good for you!) But they seemed to have a good time, and anything that has the potential to burn off a little energy before bed is A-ok in my book.
Always remember to stretch out and warm up those muscles, right?
Kendrie and her boyfriend Nicholas have apparently been arm-wrestling at recess (ah, young love) and she is trying to bulk up so she doesn’t lose to him anymore. Obviously, doing reps with your tongue sticking out of your mouth is better for you, so she's well on her way to arm-wrestling glory.
Jumping jacks, now, everyone together!
OK, could my son look any dorkier? Is it even possible? Don’t worry Renee, “total dorkdom” isn’t contagious.
Er, at least I don’t think so.
Well, it’s good to know SOMEONE is making good on my New Years Resolution to exercise more!
*****************************************************
PROOF THAT LIVING WITH CANCER HAS WARPED MY FAMILY:
Brayden was reading her library book to Blaine last night and I was in the same room (cutting out laminated papers for a teacher, imagine that!) while she regaled him with the life story of Babe Ruth. She got to the part about “Babe held the home run record for many years with 60 home runs until Mark McGuire and Sammy Sosa broke it...” and I looked over at Blaine, crooked my eyebrow and said, “And hey, Babe Ruth did it without taking steroids.”
The next page of the book stated, “Babe Ruth died in 1948 of cancer…..”
Brayden paused, and then looked at me and said, “Well no wonder he died of cancer, if he wouldn’t take his steroids!”
Yet another way my children differ from me, in the same vein as athletic ambition, is their bizarre-o desire to exercise. They think it’s fun. What’s up with that????
Anyway, we were watching my girlfriend Renee’s two sons the other night while she and her husband were at the Bon Jovi concert (yeah, see? Standing on my chair, waving a cigarette lighter in the air, and ogling Ritchie Sambora, that’s my kind of exercise!) and the kids decided they wanted to have an “Exercise Contest”. As long as they didn’t expect ME to take part, I agreed to humor them and serve as the Exercise Judge. I’m still not exactly sure what my duties were, since basically they just jumped around the living room, screaming “Watch me! Watch me!” before colliding with one another and then falling down and laughing hysterically. (Confirms my personal suspicion that endorphins are actually NOT good for you!) But they seemed to have a good time, and anything that has the potential to burn off a little energy before bed is A-ok in my book.
Always remember to stretch out and warm up those muscles, right?
Kendrie and her boyfriend Nicholas have apparently been arm-wrestling at recess (ah, young love) and she is trying to bulk up so she doesn’t lose to him anymore. Obviously, doing reps with your tongue sticking out of your mouth is better for you, so she's well on her way to arm-wrestling glory.
Jumping jacks, now, everyone together!
OK, could my son look any dorkier? Is it even possible? Don’t worry Renee, “total dorkdom” isn’t contagious.
Er, at least I don’t think so.
Well, it’s good to know SOMEONE is making good on my New Years Resolution to exercise more!
*****************************************************
PROOF THAT LIVING WITH CANCER HAS WARPED MY FAMILY:
Brayden was reading her library book to Blaine last night and I was in the same room (cutting out laminated papers for a teacher, imagine that!) while she regaled him with the life story of Babe Ruth. She got to the part about “Babe held the home run record for many years with 60 home runs until Mark McGuire and Sammy Sosa broke it...” and I looked over at Blaine, crooked my eyebrow and said, “And hey, Babe Ruth did it without taking steroids.”
The next page of the book stated, “Babe Ruth died in 1948 of cancer…..”
Brayden paused, and then looked at me and said, “Well no wonder he died of cancer, if he wouldn’t take his steroids!”
Sunday, January 15, 2006
OH, MY. I’M TURNING INTO ONE OF *THEM*
Day 31 OT
Thanks so much to all of you (many of you teachers yourselves!) who wrote in the guestbook to let me know you would rather run through Hell wearing gasoline-soaked underpants than listen to children read at school. I have to say, I’m feeling much better about myself, knowing I’m in such good company!
Now, we turn our attention to an equally drastic matter: The fact I appear to be turning into one of those obnoxious sports parents.
Let me just say, in my own defense, the words “sports” and “Kristie” have never been used in the same sentence. I’ve never played team sports, or any kind of solo sport, unless you count cross-stitching. The most athletic thing I did in high school was sing in the Glee Club. Well, that’s not completely true. I was a member of the Drill Team (those girls in the short skirts who march with the band at halftime and carry pom-poms) but definitely not the most coordinated one.
Once, when we were lined up doing our high kicks (which were not very high for me because my legs were too chubby .... sadly, there goes my Rockettes career) I got my shoe caught in my best friend Susie’s skirt and essentially de-pantsed her in the front of the entire school. She wasn’t so happy about that. And once I got Jimmy Paisley’s trombone slide caught in my pom--pom and vaulted it into the crowd at a football game. That probably wasn’t the high point of my Dance Squad career, either.
My point is that outside of catching a fabulous shoe sale at Nine West, I’ve never really known the thrill of athletic conquest for myself. Reached out and grabbed the golden ring, as it were, or tasted the spoils of the victor. Nope, a rousing game of Cranium is about as vigorous as it gets for me.
Luckily, our kids take after Blaine and have a smidge more athletic ambition than I did. So far, they’ve partaken of soccer, t-ball, baseball, dance, and gymnastics. They’ve not been particularly fabulous at any of it, but at least they are coordinated enough that they don’t embarrass themselves like I probably would have when I was young. And I have always been the parent who sits on the sidelines, cheering and rooting them on, but clapping for the other team as well. I really do hate poor winners as much as I hate poor losers, so it’s been easy for me to stress the fun of the game, as opposed to the importance of winning over losing. Plus, up to this point, sports for my kids has been all about the snack at the end of the game. And honestly, is that such a terrible way to live your life?
Then, Kellen started playing basketball this season. What I know about basketball could fit in a thimble. But that’s ok because Kellen already has a coach and he doesn’t need me hollering at him. I show up, I clap and cheer whenever anyone on our team makes a basket and don’t get worked up about anything else. I mean, it’s just a game, after all.
Until the game this Saturday, when my unbeknownst-to-me, long-lost, deep-buried competitive nature reared its ugly head.
It started out as a normal day, much like any other. We arrived at the gym a few minutes early and got to watch the game before ours play out. Then, just as Kellen’s team was warming up, we saw the opposing team walk through the door. My first thought was, “What is a high school team doing here in a 7 and 8 yr old league?” If you know Kellen, you know he is tall for his age. Not freakishly tall, but a good half a head taller than most of his classmates. He’s 7, and is still one of the tallest on his 7-8 yr old team. But, check out the kid he was assigned to guard:
All I can say is that 8 yr old's parents must be going BROKE buying Wheaties for the boy!
Needless to say, at the end of the first quarter, the score was 10-1 …. and not in our favor. But since I’m not competitive by nature, that was ok. Just remember, it’s all about having fun. Fun and snacks. Then, something amazing happened. Our team, shorter and smaller though they were, began to find chinks in the armor of the mutant giant team. By halftime, the score was 18-10, and our boys weren't backing down at all. Hey …. this was starting to get interesting.
The third quarter, the crowd around me was rallying our team and we managed to gain on them even more, only trailing by six points when the fourth quarter began. And point by point, basket by basket, we began to close the gap, while the clocked ticked away in the quarter.
Before I realized what had happened, I was on my feet with the rest of the parents, “Woof, woof!”-ing every time we scored and pumping my fist in the air, actually working up a bit of a sweat with my whooping and hollering. When we sank the basket that tied the game in the final seconds, I was jumping up and down on the metal bleachers and making quite an impressive racket with the heels of my favorite boots (I told you, Nine West has nothing on me!) and screaming like we had just scored Olympic gold. Brayden looked over at me, with a horrified look on her face and simply said, “Mom, what are you doing?” I hadn’t shown that much emotion since Rupert won a million dollars on Survivor.
When the final buzzer went off and the other team realized we had tied them (the only game this season they haven’t won, apparently) the lady behind me was shouting, “Uh, huh, now THAT’S what I’m talking about!!!” and I was gesticulating wildly in the stands, supplying my own “You go girl, tell it like it is!” and knocking people about the head with my victory dance.
Truly, me discovering my untapped athletic competitive nature in this fashion, was ugly. But I had tasted the fruit of rivalry, of coming from behind and thwarting a competitor, and I liked it. I was already planning where I could purchase orange and black face paint for next week’s game, and maybe buy one of those hats with the can-holders and straws on the side, when Kellen ran up to me and said the one thing that could pull me back to reality: “Mom, look! The snack lady brought my favorite flavor of Power-Ade, woohoo!”
Ok, whew. Thanks for bringing me back down to earth, kid, and for reminding me that all that matters is having fun. Well, that and the snack.
**************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
I was driving the kids to a birthday party on Saturday which was being held at a bowling alley we had never been to. Kendrie was worried I didn’t know the way, despite my reassurances that I knew where the alley was and that we wouldn’t be late. She kept saying, “But are you sure you know where it is?” and finally Kellen replied, “Of course she knows. She’s a mom, she knows everything.” (Because this is what I tell them all the time) to which Kendrie replied, “Uh-uh. I bet she doesn’t know how to spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.” At which point I turned around and spelled it for her. Whether I got it right or not, who knows? The important thing is that *she* doesn’t know how to spell it either and I still have my bluff in on her!
Thanks so much to all of you (many of you teachers yourselves!) who wrote in the guestbook to let me know you would rather run through Hell wearing gasoline-soaked underpants than listen to children read at school. I have to say, I’m feeling much better about myself, knowing I’m in such good company!
Now, we turn our attention to an equally drastic matter: The fact I appear to be turning into one of those obnoxious sports parents.
Let me just say, in my own defense, the words “sports” and “Kristie” have never been used in the same sentence. I’ve never played team sports, or any kind of solo sport, unless you count cross-stitching. The most athletic thing I did in high school was sing in the Glee Club. Well, that’s not completely true. I was a member of the Drill Team (those girls in the short skirts who march with the band at halftime and carry pom-poms) but definitely not the most coordinated one.
Once, when we were lined up doing our high kicks (which were not very high for me because my legs were too chubby .... sadly, there goes my Rockettes career) I got my shoe caught in my best friend Susie’s skirt and essentially de-pantsed her in the front of the entire school. She wasn’t so happy about that. And once I got Jimmy Paisley’s trombone slide caught in my pom--pom and vaulted it into the crowd at a football game. That probably wasn’t the high point of my Dance Squad career, either.
My point is that outside of catching a fabulous shoe sale at Nine West, I’ve never really known the thrill of athletic conquest for myself. Reached out and grabbed the golden ring, as it were, or tasted the spoils of the victor. Nope, a rousing game of Cranium is about as vigorous as it gets for me.
Luckily, our kids take after Blaine and have a smidge more athletic ambition than I did. So far, they’ve partaken of soccer, t-ball, baseball, dance, and gymnastics. They’ve not been particularly fabulous at any of it, but at least they are coordinated enough that they don’t embarrass themselves like I probably would have when I was young. And I have always been the parent who sits on the sidelines, cheering and rooting them on, but clapping for the other team as well. I really do hate poor winners as much as I hate poor losers, so it’s been easy for me to stress the fun of the game, as opposed to the importance of winning over losing. Plus, up to this point, sports for my kids has been all about the snack at the end of the game. And honestly, is that such a terrible way to live your life?
Then, Kellen started playing basketball this season. What I know about basketball could fit in a thimble. But that’s ok because Kellen already has a coach and he doesn’t need me hollering at him. I show up, I clap and cheer whenever anyone on our team makes a basket and don’t get worked up about anything else. I mean, it’s just a game, after all.
Until the game this Saturday, when my unbeknownst-to-me, long-lost, deep-buried competitive nature reared its ugly head.
It started out as a normal day, much like any other. We arrived at the gym a few minutes early and got to watch the game before ours play out. Then, just as Kellen’s team was warming up, we saw the opposing team walk through the door. My first thought was, “What is a high school team doing here in a 7 and 8 yr old league?” If you know Kellen, you know he is tall for his age. Not freakishly tall, but a good half a head taller than most of his classmates. He’s 7, and is still one of the tallest on his 7-8 yr old team. But, check out the kid he was assigned to guard:
All I can say is that 8 yr old's parents must be going BROKE buying Wheaties for the boy!
Needless to say, at the end of the first quarter, the score was 10-1 …. and not in our favor. But since I’m not competitive by nature, that was ok. Just remember, it’s all about having fun. Fun and snacks. Then, something amazing happened. Our team, shorter and smaller though they were, began to find chinks in the armor of the mutant giant team. By halftime, the score was 18-10, and our boys weren't backing down at all. Hey …. this was starting to get interesting.
The third quarter, the crowd around me was rallying our team and we managed to gain on them even more, only trailing by six points when the fourth quarter began. And point by point, basket by basket, we began to close the gap, while the clocked ticked away in the quarter.
Before I realized what had happened, I was on my feet with the rest of the parents, “Woof, woof!”-ing every time we scored and pumping my fist in the air, actually working up a bit of a sweat with my whooping and hollering. When we sank the basket that tied the game in the final seconds, I was jumping up and down on the metal bleachers and making quite an impressive racket with the heels of my favorite boots (I told you, Nine West has nothing on me!) and screaming like we had just scored Olympic gold. Brayden looked over at me, with a horrified look on her face and simply said, “Mom, what are you doing?” I hadn’t shown that much emotion since Rupert won a million dollars on Survivor.
When the final buzzer went off and the other team realized we had tied them (the only game this season they haven’t won, apparently) the lady behind me was shouting, “Uh, huh, now THAT’S what I’m talking about!!!” and I was gesticulating wildly in the stands, supplying my own “You go girl, tell it like it is!” and knocking people about the head with my victory dance.
Truly, me discovering my untapped athletic competitive nature in this fashion, was ugly. But I had tasted the fruit of rivalry, of coming from behind and thwarting a competitor, and I liked it. I was already planning where I could purchase orange and black face paint for next week’s game, and maybe buy one of those hats with the can-holders and straws on the side, when Kellen ran up to me and said the one thing that could pull me back to reality: “Mom, look! The snack lady brought my favorite flavor of Power-Ade, woohoo!”
Ok, whew. Thanks for bringing me back down to earth, kid, and for reminding me that all that matters is having fun. Well, that and the snack.
**************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
I was driving the kids to a birthday party on Saturday which was being held at a bowling alley we had never been to. Kendrie was worried I didn’t know the way, despite my reassurances that I knew where the alley was and that we wouldn’t be late. She kept saying, “But are you sure you know where it is?” and finally Kellen replied, “Of course she knows. She’s a mom, she knows everything.” (Because this is what I tell them all the time) to which Kendrie replied, “Uh-uh. I bet she doesn’t know how to spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.” At which point I turned around and spelled it for her. Whether I got it right or not, who knows? The important thing is that *she* doesn’t know how to spell it either and I still have my bluff in on her!
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
HMMMMM, WHO KNEW I WOULD MISS THE HIDDEN PERKS?
Day 27 OT
Everyone has a few things in life that, no matter how hard they try, no matter how much they want to succeed, they are simply not good at. Or don’t enjoy doing. Or have tried, and should NEVER, EVER do again. For me, it’s singing karaoke in public. Playing any kind of sport that requires any athletic ability in the least. And finding the image in those damn Magic Eye Pictures. No matter how hard I try, listening to my friends go on and on about how easy it is … “just relax your eyes, can’t you see the {insert} duck/bunny/house in the middle? You’re not relaxing” No, no, NO … I can’t see it!!!!! AAAaaggggghhhhh! I hate those things!
Oh, and one other thing I don’t like to do and try to avoid at all costs: spending time with children.
Now, obviously, I have three kids, so I spend time with them, no matter what. And even though they drive me crazy, I usually enjoy being with them.
No, I’m talking about spending my FREE time with children. Specifically, with children that are not my own, doing things that I don’t like to do. Even more specifically, volunteering to read with children at the elementary school my kids attend. Even more, more specifically, ***being volunteered*** to read with kids. Stay-at-home moms everywhere know just what I’m talking about, don’t you?
I spend a LOT of time volunteering at my kids’ school. And I like it. I spend every Tuesday helping three different teachers organize their weekly take-home folders. I am the official PTO secretary and the un-official PTO photographer. So far this year, I have worked Picture Day, the Book Fair, the Secret Santa Workshop, PTO fundraisers, and proctored 4th grade and 5th grade testing. I am in my kids’ classroom for every holiday party, Parent’s Day, Career Day (even though I don’t technically have a career …. at least not one I get paid for!) Craft Day and Cooking Activity, and I have helped make cupcakes to celebrate the PTO monthly birthday party. I have shelved books in the library and helped pass out pizza for reading reward parties. You know what? I don’t mind at all. In fact, I kind of like it.
I like being able to keep an eye on my kids, and on the kids that my kids hang out with. I like getting to know the teachers, the administration, and the other parent volunteers. I like being a part of the activities, most of which are fun. There’s a reason Blaine and I decided I wouldn’t work (besides the fact I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up) …. that we don’t live in a bigger house or drive newer cars or vacation in Acapulco every Spring Break. For now, *this* is my job, and I like it, even though the monetary compensation leaves a little to be desired.
But there is one thing I do NOT like to do: read with children. Read to children. Have children read to me.
I do not like to read to kids,
I do not want to, God forbid.
And if I had to, if I did,
I’d rather eat a giant squid.
If I wanted to work one on one with kids, especially kids who are struggling, I would have gone to school to be a teacher. Or a tutor. Or even taken the class to be a substitute. But it’s not a passion I have. It’s not even something I do very well. I have a tendency to yawn --- a lot --- whenever I’m being read to. It’s boring. It’s even boring when my own kids do it. And really, yawning in front of your own kid is rude enough …. Yawning in front of some other kid, not even related to you, is even ruder.
I’m not good at it. I don’t enjoy it. I. Don't. Want. To.
I tried it last year. For six weeks, I showed up every Thursday afternoon to read with a very sweet boy in the 5th grade. He was a quiet, polite, well-mannered kid. His reading skills were atrocious. Listening to him read made me want to plug my ears with those little things you stick in the ends of your corn on the cob. I was not good at pretending to be fascinated, or thinking up questions to ask him, or quizzing him on what he had just read to see if his problem was actually reading, or retention. Don’t you think if I had ANY of those skills, I would have gone into teaching as a profession???
So, I did what any normal, cowardly, person would do. I lied. I told his teacher that since my youngest daughter was being treated for cancer and I never knew exactly when we might need to go to Atlanta, or when she might be feeling poorly, I didn’t think I was reliable enough to be a weekly reading helper. It was not only a lie, it was a big fat lie. Truth was, I just hated it, but didn’t have the guts to say so.
But it got me out of it, and that's all that mattered.
Then, yesterday, it happened. A different teacher asked if I would be available to come in once a week to be a (sigh) reading tutor. Believe me, I understand that some kids need an extra boost. I understand that there just aren’t enough hours in the day for the teacher to do it all herself, and that stay-at-home moms like me … who have **chosen** to stay home so we can be as involved as possible, are sometimes their best hope for back up.
But please, ask me to help kids make a life-size igloo out of cotton balls, or help with the costumes for the Literary Parade. Ask me to organize the games for 50's Night, or donate for the Bake Sale. Ask me to bring three dozen juice boxes for a class party, or take home seven hundred laminated papers that need to be cut into the shape of Mount Rushmore. I’m happy to sit in for the 3rd grade writing tests next Wednesday and Thursday (that reminds me, I’ve got to put that on my calendar!) or help decorate the bulletin boards in the commons area.
Just whatever you do, don’t ask me to read with kids. Because now that Kendrie is off-treatment, I’ve got to come up with some other fib about why I’m unavailable for that particular project. Who would have ever thought I would long for the “good ole’ days” when I could use her chemo schedule as an excuse???
Wish me luck coming up with another one, because I sure as heck won’t find the courage to just tell the truth.
****************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
We were sitting at dinner the other night, trying to entice Kendrie to actually eat some of the fresh fruit I had put on her plate and not make an entire meal out of the shredded cheese we had sitting on the table. I was explaining that shredded cheese is a “topping” for spaghetti, not a food group in and of itself. She said cheese is what she likes (simple enough, right?) and all she wanted for dinner. Exasperated, I made the comment, “Kendrie, before chemo, you used to eat fruit all the time …. You *have* to start eating it again because it’s healthy for you” and Brayden, always the helpful one, chimed in with, “Yeah, but Mom, I remember you saying that the medicine she took might have made her taste bugs like different things.”
Taste bugs?
It was so cute I barely had the heart to correct her. But I did. Because that’s my job as a parent, to squelch every cute thing they do. And try not to yawn when they read to me.
Everyone has a few things in life that, no matter how hard they try, no matter how much they want to succeed, they are simply not good at. Or don’t enjoy doing. Or have tried, and should NEVER, EVER do again. For me, it’s singing karaoke in public. Playing any kind of sport that requires any athletic ability in the least. And finding the image in those damn Magic Eye Pictures. No matter how hard I try, listening to my friends go on and on about how easy it is … “just relax your eyes, can’t you see the {insert} duck/bunny/house in the middle? You’re not relaxing” No, no, NO … I can’t see it!!!!! AAAaaggggghhhhh! I hate those things!
Oh, and one other thing I don’t like to do and try to avoid at all costs: spending time with children.
Now, obviously, I have three kids, so I spend time with them, no matter what. And even though they drive me crazy, I usually enjoy being with them.
No, I’m talking about spending my FREE time with children. Specifically, with children that are not my own, doing things that I don’t like to do. Even more specifically, volunteering to read with children at the elementary school my kids attend. Even more, more specifically, ***being volunteered*** to read with kids. Stay-at-home moms everywhere know just what I’m talking about, don’t you?
I spend a LOT of time volunteering at my kids’ school. And I like it. I spend every Tuesday helping three different teachers organize their weekly take-home folders. I am the official PTO secretary and the un-official PTO photographer. So far this year, I have worked Picture Day, the Book Fair, the Secret Santa Workshop, PTO fundraisers, and proctored 4th grade and 5th grade testing. I am in my kids’ classroom for every holiday party, Parent’s Day, Career Day (even though I don’t technically have a career …. at least not one I get paid for!) Craft Day and Cooking Activity, and I have helped make cupcakes to celebrate the PTO monthly birthday party. I have shelved books in the library and helped pass out pizza for reading reward parties. You know what? I don’t mind at all. In fact, I kind of like it.
I like being able to keep an eye on my kids, and on the kids that my kids hang out with. I like getting to know the teachers, the administration, and the other parent volunteers. I like being a part of the activities, most of which are fun. There’s a reason Blaine and I decided I wouldn’t work (besides the fact I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up) …. that we don’t live in a bigger house or drive newer cars or vacation in Acapulco every Spring Break. For now, *this* is my job, and I like it, even though the monetary compensation leaves a little to be desired.
But there is one thing I do NOT like to do: read with children. Read to children. Have children read to me.
I do not like to read to kids,
I do not want to, God forbid.
And if I had to, if I did,
I’d rather eat a giant squid.
If I wanted to work one on one with kids, especially kids who are struggling, I would have gone to school to be a teacher. Or a tutor. Or even taken the class to be a substitute. But it’s not a passion I have. It’s not even something I do very well. I have a tendency to yawn --- a lot --- whenever I’m being read to. It’s boring. It’s even boring when my own kids do it. And really, yawning in front of your own kid is rude enough …. Yawning in front of some other kid, not even related to you, is even ruder.
I’m not good at it. I don’t enjoy it. I. Don't. Want. To.
I tried it last year. For six weeks, I showed up every Thursday afternoon to read with a very sweet boy in the 5th grade. He was a quiet, polite, well-mannered kid. His reading skills were atrocious. Listening to him read made me want to plug my ears with those little things you stick in the ends of your corn on the cob. I was not good at pretending to be fascinated, or thinking up questions to ask him, or quizzing him on what he had just read to see if his problem was actually reading, or retention. Don’t you think if I had ANY of those skills, I would have gone into teaching as a profession???
So, I did what any normal, cowardly, person would do. I lied. I told his teacher that since my youngest daughter was being treated for cancer and I never knew exactly when we might need to go to Atlanta, or when she might be feeling poorly, I didn’t think I was reliable enough to be a weekly reading helper. It was not only a lie, it was a big fat lie. Truth was, I just hated it, but didn’t have the guts to say so.
But it got me out of it, and that's all that mattered.
Then, yesterday, it happened. A different teacher asked if I would be available to come in once a week to be a (sigh) reading tutor. Believe me, I understand that some kids need an extra boost. I understand that there just aren’t enough hours in the day for the teacher to do it all herself, and that stay-at-home moms like me … who have **chosen** to stay home so we can be as involved as possible, are sometimes their best hope for back up.
But please, ask me to help kids make a life-size igloo out of cotton balls, or help with the costumes for the Literary Parade. Ask me to organize the games for 50's Night, or donate for the Bake Sale. Ask me to bring three dozen juice boxes for a class party, or take home seven hundred laminated papers that need to be cut into the shape of Mount Rushmore. I’m happy to sit in for the 3rd grade writing tests next Wednesday and Thursday (that reminds me, I’ve got to put that on my calendar!) or help decorate the bulletin boards in the commons area.
Just whatever you do, don’t ask me to read with kids. Because now that Kendrie is off-treatment, I’ve got to come up with some other fib about why I’m unavailable for that particular project. Who would have ever thought I would long for the “good ole’ days” when I could use her chemo schedule as an excuse???
Wish me luck coming up with another one, because I sure as heck won’t find the courage to just tell the truth.
****************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
We were sitting at dinner the other night, trying to entice Kendrie to actually eat some of the fresh fruit I had put on her plate and not make an entire meal out of the shredded cheese we had sitting on the table. I was explaining that shredded cheese is a “topping” for spaghetti, not a food group in and of itself. She said cheese is what she likes (simple enough, right?) and all she wanted for dinner. Exasperated, I made the comment, “Kendrie, before chemo, you used to eat fruit all the time …. You *have* to start eating it again because it’s healthy for you” and Brayden, always the helpful one, chimed in with, “Yeah, but Mom, I remember you saying that the medicine she took might have made her taste bugs like different things.”
Taste bugs?
It was so cute I barely had the heart to correct her. But I did. Because that’s my job as a parent, to squelch every cute thing they do. And try not to yawn when they read to me.
Friday, January 06, 2006
JUST WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS OUT, THEY PULLED ME BACK IN!
And by “They”, I mean those never-ending, life-sucking prescription refills!
Day 22 OT
Kendrie had her first off-treatment check up today in Atlanta. She was not real happy about the finger-stick, and was showing off the “giant hole” in her finger to anyone who would look the rest of the day, making quite a production out of it. I think if she could have gotten away with adding a limp, or perhaps an ace bandage around her head, she would have.
Her blood counts were perfect, though, right where her oncologist wants them to be. He even said that unless she starts having any troubles, we don’t need to bring her back for two months. He does want to check her blood work every four weeks, but next month we can just run her to the lab on base and have the results faxed up. She won’t miss an entire day of school, and I won’t have to drive back to Atlanta until March --- how odd will that seem?!?!? No complaints here, though. She does have what appears to be a fairly-typical post-treatment rash on her arms and one side of her face. No treatment necessary except for a topical anti-itch cream, unless it doesn’t go away in a few weeks. And that was it --- fairly anticlimactic for our first visit ….. JUST the way I wanted it to be!
So I was driving home this afternoon, feeling all smug about how we seem to be successfully leaving our treatment days behind, one baby-step at a time, and what a nice feeling it is to be cruising along with nothing more treacherous than a monthly finger-stick in our path … when it happened. The wake-up call that no, indeed, reminded me I have no business being so full of myself, thinking we’ve left the world of leukemia behind. The wake-up call disguised as: PRESCRIPTION REFILLS.
Now, although Kendrie is technically off-treatment, she still takes two different oral pill prescriptions each night for chemo cough, still takes her Bactrim (antibiotic) four times a week, and we keep a stash of both Zofran (anti-nausea med) and Miralax (stool softener) on hand just because *those* lovely side effects could pop up at any time and we certainly don’t want to be caught unprepared. Naturally, four of these five prescriptions came close to running out right around the same time this week … even more naturally, they are all four filled at different pharmacies in our town. Just what is UP with that???
Only one pharmacy in town can flavor the Bactrim, so we go there for that. Only one pharmacy (naturally, on the other side of town) has dissolvable Zofran, so we go there for that. The pharmacy closest to our home is where one prescription is filled, and Blaine gets the fourth filled at the pharmacy on base. I’m not quite sure how that happened, but that’s just they way it worked out. We’ve been doing it this way for the past twenty-seven months, so no big deal, really, until they all run out at once.
Now, being the savvy cancer-parent that I am, I called all the refills in ahead of time so I wouldn’t waste time standing around in the pharmacies. Lord knows I’ve got important things to do with my time …. like organize Kellen’s underwear drawer, or arrange all of Brayden’s Bratz dolls in alphabetical order, or something. I was going to be wasting enough time driving all over God’s green earth from pharmacy to pharmacy as it was. So, after dinner tonight, instead of spending quality family time with my husband and kids, I drove to the pharmacy closest to home and got the first refill … no problem. I then drove across town to the second pharmacy, only to be told they only had ten of the thirty pills on the script, and could I come back Monday to pick up the rest??? Fine (sigh) I’ll come back Monday.
Then I drove (across town the OTHER way, of course --- visualize a triangle, and me making trips to all three points) to the third pharmacy, only to have the tech tell me “it was too soon to get the med refilled”. Of course, she said it loudly …. “YOU’RE TRYING TO GET IT REFILLED BEFORE YOU ARE ALLOWED ANY MORE” Why not just put a flashing neon “Drug Abuser” sign over my head??? Really, how embarrassing. I replied, (in an equally-loud voice so the people in line behind me would know I wasn’t really a drug-seeking loser) “Well, my DAUGHTER only has enough ANTIBIOTIC to see her through the weekend, so I don’t see how it can be too soon.” She double checked and said, “Oh, it says right here that your insurance company says they won’t refill it until tomorrow. You’ll have to come back then unless you want to pay the whole thing now.” Tomorrow. Are you kidding me???? One measly day? Embarrassing as it was, I couldn’t stop the snort and “Oh, for God’s sake” comment that came out of my mouth. I seriously considered paying for it, bearing in mind it would be another hour of my time the next day, and the gas it would take to get over there …. But decided not to, on principle. Of course, tomorrow when I’m driving back to one pharmacy and Monday when I’m driving back to the second, I’ll probably be grumbling a different tune.
So as I was driving home (oh, and by the way did I mention that I managed to spend $80 in the grocery store that houses pharmacy #3?) complaining to Blaine on my cell phone about how I spent two hours and $80, and was still only coming home with one and a half of my four refills, I realized ….. we still have a ways to go. Kendrie will be on these meds at least three months …. More like six for the Bactrim. I guess it’s to keep me humble. Or just drive me crazy, I’m not sure.
I’m telling you, pharmacy school would have been worth it just for the free samples. In the meantime, Kendrie and I will both keeping trying to find our Grail. Although I’m not a huge Monty Python fan (as in, not at all) I just love this song that was sent to me and think it’s perfect for coming off treatment. Especially for a mom who's being driven insane by prescription refills --- for a kid who doesn't even technically *have* cancer anymore!!! (But that's so fun to say!) :)
Please keep our friend Catie in mind as she and her parents Jenny and Tre’ prepare for her surgery on Monday, a third attempt by the surgeons to remove ALL the remaining tumor from her brain. I’m very hopeful that this is IT for sweet little Catie and she can move on to her life WITHOUT cancer, like she deserves!
**************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
Wednesday was our final day of Christmas vacation and I wanted it to be a good one for my kids, so we: ate lunch with friends at one of their favorite restaurants, went to see a matinee of “Cheaper by the Dozen 2”, went with said friends to a local park for an hour and a half, and went to a friends’ house for another hour to jump on their trampoline. Then, it was time to take Kellen to his first basketball scrimmage and I made sure to pack crayons and coloring books for the girls so they wouldn’t’ be bored.
By the time it was over, we had been gone from 11am until 7pm, no dinner, and we were all hungry. Kendrie said she wanted to go to McDonalds for dinner and I said, no, even though we needed to do fast food, for time’s sake since it was a school night, I would prefer Wendy’s so I could get a baked potato … something with a little more substance than Chicken McNuggets. Kendrie had the nerve to look me right in the face, after I spent eight hours and countless dollars doing fun things with her this day, and say, “NO fair! I never get to do anything that *I* want to do!!!”
I’ll remind her of that on the next vacation day that I make them spend shopping for groceries, putting away laundry, cleaning the gutters, and re-grouting the tile floor in the bathroom.
Day 22 OT
Kendrie had her first off-treatment check up today in Atlanta. She was not real happy about the finger-stick, and was showing off the “giant hole” in her finger to anyone who would look the rest of the day, making quite a production out of it. I think if she could have gotten away with adding a limp, or perhaps an ace bandage around her head, she would have.
Her blood counts were perfect, though, right where her oncologist wants them to be. He even said that unless she starts having any troubles, we don’t need to bring her back for two months. He does want to check her blood work every four weeks, but next month we can just run her to the lab on base and have the results faxed up. She won’t miss an entire day of school, and I won’t have to drive back to Atlanta until March --- how odd will that seem?!?!? No complaints here, though. She does have what appears to be a fairly-typical post-treatment rash on her arms and one side of her face. No treatment necessary except for a topical anti-itch cream, unless it doesn’t go away in a few weeks. And that was it --- fairly anticlimactic for our first visit ….. JUST the way I wanted it to be!
So I was driving home this afternoon, feeling all smug about how we seem to be successfully leaving our treatment days behind, one baby-step at a time, and what a nice feeling it is to be cruising along with nothing more treacherous than a monthly finger-stick in our path … when it happened. The wake-up call that no, indeed, reminded me I have no business being so full of myself, thinking we’ve left the world of leukemia behind. The wake-up call disguised as: PRESCRIPTION REFILLS.
Now, although Kendrie is technically off-treatment, she still takes two different oral pill prescriptions each night for chemo cough, still takes her Bactrim (antibiotic) four times a week, and we keep a stash of both Zofran (anti-nausea med) and Miralax (stool softener) on hand just because *those* lovely side effects could pop up at any time and we certainly don’t want to be caught unprepared. Naturally, four of these five prescriptions came close to running out right around the same time this week … even more naturally, they are all four filled at different pharmacies in our town. Just what is UP with that???
Only one pharmacy in town can flavor the Bactrim, so we go there for that. Only one pharmacy (naturally, on the other side of town) has dissolvable Zofran, so we go there for that. The pharmacy closest to our home is where one prescription is filled, and Blaine gets the fourth filled at the pharmacy on base. I’m not quite sure how that happened, but that’s just they way it worked out. We’ve been doing it this way for the past twenty-seven months, so no big deal, really, until they all run out at once.
Now, being the savvy cancer-parent that I am, I called all the refills in ahead of time so I wouldn’t waste time standing around in the pharmacies. Lord knows I’ve got important things to do with my time …. like organize Kellen’s underwear drawer, or arrange all of Brayden’s Bratz dolls in alphabetical order, or something. I was going to be wasting enough time driving all over God’s green earth from pharmacy to pharmacy as it was. So, after dinner tonight, instead of spending quality family time with my husband and kids, I drove to the pharmacy closest to home and got the first refill … no problem. I then drove across town to the second pharmacy, only to be told they only had ten of the thirty pills on the script, and could I come back Monday to pick up the rest??? Fine (sigh) I’ll come back Monday.
Then I drove (across town the OTHER way, of course --- visualize a triangle, and me making trips to all three points) to the third pharmacy, only to have the tech tell me “it was too soon to get the med refilled”. Of course, she said it loudly …. “YOU’RE TRYING TO GET IT REFILLED BEFORE YOU ARE ALLOWED ANY MORE” Why not just put a flashing neon “Drug Abuser” sign over my head??? Really, how embarrassing. I replied, (in an equally-loud voice so the people in line behind me would know I wasn’t really a drug-seeking loser) “Well, my DAUGHTER only has enough ANTIBIOTIC to see her through the weekend, so I don’t see how it can be too soon.” She double checked and said, “Oh, it says right here that your insurance company says they won’t refill it until tomorrow. You’ll have to come back then unless you want to pay the whole thing now.” Tomorrow. Are you kidding me???? One measly day? Embarrassing as it was, I couldn’t stop the snort and “Oh, for God’s sake” comment that came out of my mouth. I seriously considered paying for it, bearing in mind it would be another hour of my time the next day, and the gas it would take to get over there …. But decided not to, on principle. Of course, tomorrow when I’m driving back to one pharmacy and Monday when I’m driving back to the second, I’ll probably be grumbling a different tune.
So as I was driving home (oh, and by the way did I mention that I managed to spend $80 in the grocery store that houses pharmacy #3?) complaining to Blaine on my cell phone about how I spent two hours and $80, and was still only coming home with one and a half of my four refills, I realized ….. we still have a ways to go. Kendrie will be on these meds at least three months …. More like six for the Bactrim. I guess it’s to keep me humble. Or just drive me crazy, I’m not sure.
I’m telling you, pharmacy school would have been worth it just for the free samples. In the meantime, Kendrie and I will both keeping trying to find our Grail. Although I’m not a huge Monty Python fan (as in, not at all) I just love this song that was sent to me and think it’s perfect for coming off treatment. Especially for a mom who's being driven insane by prescription refills --- for a kid who doesn't even technically *have* cancer anymore!!! (But that's so fun to say!) :)
Please keep our friend Catie in mind as she and her parents Jenny and Tre’ prepare for her surgery on Monday, a third attempt by the surgeons to remove ALL the remaining tumor from her brain. I’m very hopeful that this is IT for sweet little Catie and she can move on to her life WITHOUT cancer, like she deserves!
**************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
Wednesday was our final day of Christmas vacation and I wanted it to be a good one for my kids, so we: ate lunch with friends at one of their favorite restaurants, went to see a matinee of “Cheaper by the Dozen 2”, went with said friends to a local park for an hour and a half, and went to a friends’ house for another hour to jump on their trampoline. Then, it was time to take Kellen to his first basketball scrimmage and I made sure to pack crayons and coloring books for the girls so they wouldn’t’ be bored.
By the time it was over, we had been gone from 11am until 7pm, no dinner, and we were all hungry. Kendrie said she wanted to go to McDonalds for dinner and I said, no, even though we needed to do fast food, for time’s sake since it was a school night, I would prefer Wendy’s so I could get a baked potato … something with a little more substance than Chicken McNuggets. Kendrie had the nerve to look me right in the face, after I spent eight hours and countless dollars doing fun things with her this day, and say, “NO fair! I never get to do anything that *I* want to do!!!”
I’ll remind her of that on the next vacation day that I make them spend shopping for groceries, putting away laundry, cleaning the gutters, and re-grouting the tile floor in the bathroom.
Monday, January 02, 2006
NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS, 2006
SUCCEED OR FAIL????
Day 18 OT
So, like everyone else, I’ve made my New Years Resolutions for this year, and once again, have vowed to lose the same twenty pounds I’ve been trying to lose since I was a teenager. (snort! I’ll never lose those twenty pounds unless I have them surgically removed!) Quite frankly, I’m too lazy to work for world peace, or save any whales or rain forests, so this year, I set my sights a little lower. I set goals that I thought might be “do-able” for me. I’ll detail them for you, with photo hints, and we can play a little game called “Succeed or Fail?”
Yesterday, Jan 1st, the bright, shining, optimistic NEW day to a NEW year, did Kristie succeed or fail already at her resolutions??? Let’s play:
Resolution #1: No more washing laundry, and then drying laundry, and then leaving the clothes either a) in the dryer for a week, or b) in laundry baskets in my bedroom, waiting to be folded. I am really, really bad about this. So, did I succeed or fail?
Well, since this was the view from my bed late last night, three baskets of clean laundry that needed to be folded and put away, obviously Resolution #1 was a big fat FAILURE already. It’s always so sad to be off to such a dismal start, isn’t it?
Resolution #2: Eat healthier. I officially give up on the twenty pounds, but really, would it kill me to lay off the snack food and soda? So, the first day of the first month of the new year, did I succeed or fail?
Well, this is the bag sitting beside my computer late last night …. So you can pretty much guess for yourself. (But honestly, was it a big surprise to anyone???)
Resolution #3: Get more exercise. Ha! Who am I kidding????
(Ahhhh, wiping the mirth from my eyes and giggling …..) This is what my treadmill looks like, and this is most likely what it will always look like. Let’s just be truthful about it. A little honesty never hurt anyone. But a treadmill ... now, THAT can hurt you! Muscle pulls, ligament aches, ankle pains, groin strains ..... no wonder I don't use it, it's dangerous!
Resolution #4: Don’t lose my patience as much with my kids. Don’t yell. At least not as often. Find creative, inventive ways to solve arguments and problems. Be the kind of nurturing, smiling, happy mother you see in the magazines.
Well, ***this*** didn’t go so well. I made it until 9:42 am without yelling, which really isn’t so good considering I didn’t get up until 8:42 am. All three kids were in time-out before noon, Brayden and Kendrie were put to bed at 7pm as punishment last night, and before falling asleep, Brayden managed to yell at me, “I don’t even know why you HAD kids!” Now, if that’s not a loving family, I don’t know what is.
So, this morning, I awoke determined to right my wrongs from yesterday. By noon I had folded and put away all three loads of laundry, cleaned off the treadmill (although I still haven’t actually walked on it yet) and worked much harder to keep my kids happy. I had hoped they could go outside and burn off some energy today, but it is raining here (thunder and lightning and everything) so instead, I played eight games of Boggle, innumerous games of Toss-Across, and let the kids color Easter Eggs with some coloring kits I found in the back of my closet while putting away the Christmas decorations.
Don’t adjust your monitors, yes, it’s January 2nd, and yes, we’re coloring Easter Eggs. Then, I cooked lunch (well, that’s a generous description for heating up Bagel Bites) and hooked up the dvd player so the girls could watch a movie in Brayden’s bedroom. So far, so good.
But, I must confess, I ate at least ten Hershey kisses while typing this, and it’s only 1pm. So the potential for total resolution failure is definitely there. Don’t pass me that parenting trophy just yet.
In the meantime, hope your own resolutions are holding strong. :)
Kristie
****************************************************
MOMENT OF THE DAY:
Last night, while both girls were *supposed* to be in bed already, you know, what with the punishment and all, I was in my bedroom reading when I heard all kinds of giggling. They came in my room with orders to “Close your eyes, Mom, we have a surprise.” So, dutifully, I closed my eyes. Kendrie said, “OK, open them” and I did, to the disgusting sight of a FROG being held not two inches from my face. You can imagine the scene that unfolded, flailing limbs, bedclothes flying, screaming, and me trying to get to the other side of the room as quickly as possible.
Kendrie had very few limitations during her treatment, but one of the biggies was NO reptiles of any kind … frogs, turtles, lizards, etc, because they can carry salmonella and her immune system might have had problems. So for the past two years she has not been allowed to touch any of those things, much to her great disappointment. Apparently when Blaine saw one on our back deck last night he called them out there and well, the temptation was just too great.
All I have to say, is yuck. I SO could have done without that.
Day 18 OT
So, like everyone else, I’ve made my New Years Resolutions for this year, and once again, have vowed to lose the same twenty pounds I’ve been trying to lose since I was a teenager. (snort! I’ll never lose those twenty pounds unless I have them surgically removed!) Quite frankly, I’m too lazy to work for world peace, or save any whales or rain forests, so this year, I set my sights a little lower. I set goals that I thought might be “do-able” for me. I’ll detail them for you, with photo hints, and we can play a little game called “Succeed or Fail?”
Yesterday, Jan 1st, the bright, shining, optimistic NEW day to a NEW year, did Kristie succeed or fail already at her resolutions??? Let’s play:
Resolution #1: No more washing laundry, and then drying laundry, and then leaving the clothes either a) in the dryer for a week, or b) in laundry baskets in my bedroom, waiting to be folded. I am really, really bad about this. So, did I succeed or fail?
Well, since this was the view from my bed late last night, three baskets of clean laundry that needed to be folded and put away, obviously Resolution #1 was a big fat FAILURE already. It’s always so sad to be off to such a dismal start, isn’t it?
Resolution #2: Eat healthier. I officially give up on the twenty pounds, but really, would it kill me to lay off the snack food and soda? So, the first day of the first month of the new year, did I succeed or fail?
Well, this is the bag sitting beside my computer late last night …. So you can pretty much guess for yourself. (But honestly, was it a big surprise to anyone???)
Resolution #3: Get more exercise. Ha! Who am I kidding????
(Ahhhh, wiping the mirth from my eyes and giggling …..) This is what my treadmill looks like, and this is most likely what it will always look like. Let’s just be truthful about it. A little honesty never hurt anyone. But a treadmill ... now, THAT can hurt you! Muscle pulls, ligament aches, ankle pains, groin strains ..... no wonder I don't use it, it's dangerous!
Resolution #4: Don’t lose my patience as much with my kids. Don’t yell. At least not as often. Find creative, inventive ways to solve arguments and problems. Be the kind of nurturing, smiling, happy mother you see in the magazines.
Well, ***this*** didn’t go so well. I made it until 9:42 am without yelling, which really isn’t so good considering I didn’t get up until 8:42 am. All three kids were in time-out before noon, Brayden and Kendrie were put to bed at 7pm as punishment last night, and before falling asleep, Brayden managed to yell at me, “I don’t even know why you HAD kids!” Now, if that’s not a loving family, I don’t know what is.
So, this morning, I awoke determined to right my wrongs from yesterday. By noon I had folded and put away all three loads of laundry, cleaned off the treadmill (although I still haven’t actually walked on it yet) and worked much harder to keep my kids happy. I had hoped they could go outside and burn off some energy today, but it is raining here (thunder and lightning and everything) so instead, I played eight games of Boggle, innumerous games of Toss-Across, and let the kids color Easter Eggs with some coloring kits I found in the back of my closet while putting away the Christmas decorations.
Don’t adjust your monitors, yes, it’s January 2nd, and yes, we’re coloring Easter Eggs. Then, I cooked lunch (well, that’s a generous description for heating up Bagel Bites) and hooked up the dvd player so the girls could watch a movie in Brayden’s bedroom. So far, so good.
But, I must confess, I ate at least ten Hershey kisses while typing this, and it’s only 1pm. So the potential for total resolution failure is definitely there. Don’t pass me that parenting trophy just yet.
In the meantime, hope your own resolutions are holding strong. :)
Kristie
****************************************************
MOMENT OF THE DAY:
Last night, while both girls were *supposed* to be in bed already, you know, what with the punishment and all, I was in my bedroom reading when I heard all kinds of giggling. They came in my room with orders to “Close your eyes, Mom, we have a surprise.” So, dutifully, I closed my eyes. Kendrie said, “OK, open them” and I did, to the disgusting sight of a FROG being held not two inches from my face. You can imagine the scene that unfolded, flailing limbs, bedclothes flying, screaming, and me trying to get to the other side of the room as quickly as possible.
Kendrie had very few limitations during her treatment, but one of the biggies was NO reptiles of any kind … frogs, turtles, lizards, etc, because they can carry salmonella and her immune system might have had problems. So for the past two years she has not been allowed to touch any of those things, much to her great disappointment. Apparently when Blaine saw one on our back deck last night he called them out there and well, the temptation was just too great.
All I have to say, is yuck. I SO could have done without that.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER
Day 14 OT --- Two weeks already, wahoo!
I feel slightly like a teller of “tall tales” to call the past twenty-six months of our life “troubled water”. Oh, sure, the first two months after Kendrie’s leukemia diagnosis were rough and choppy … it felt pretty much like being rushed downstream of a swollen river, not willingly, by the way, without a life jacket, going under and gulping for air, and crashing into uprooted, floating trees and churning, bloated animal carcasses, all the while terrified that when you turned round the next bend, there would be a giant, rushing waterfall just waiting to suck you over and plunge your defenseless body down onto the slippery, pointed, jagged rocks below. You know, something like that. If I were prone to exaggeration. Or whatever.
Once we got past the first two months of induction and consolidation, however, we were lucky. We were pretty much able to tread water for the next two years with very little in the way of turbulence. But that in NO way stopped the outpouring of love and care we received from strangers, friends, and strangers who *became* friends. To say you were our “bridge over troubled water” is like calling Paris Hilton “slightly” ego-centric. Our friends and supports weren’t a simple bridge. You have been the Golden Gate Suspension Bridge of our lives!
I want to thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for all the wonderful notes, e-mails, guestbook messages, cards, care packages and gifts you have sent our family. I tried answering every single one personally, but just ran out of time before it seemed like it had been “too” long. I’m still working on the official thank you notes, but wanted to take this chance to publicly thank all of you for your kindness. Add in the fact Christmas was just a week later, and my kids are basically rolling in it. Short of winning the lottery (which will be difficult since we don’t *play* the lottery) they will probably never have another year like this one, so I sure hope they appreciate it as much as I do! Thanks to all of you.
Now, it's almost two weeks after the fact, but better late than never, right? Here are the photos and details of Kendrie’s Off-Treatment Party, which I am happy to say was a complete success. Well, I suppose I shouldn’t speak for the guests, some of whom drove ten, a hundred, or a thousand miles to be with us …… but *I* had a great time! My only complaint about the entire day was that it was a little bit cool and damp. BUT! My specific prayer was for “no rain” and I got that (it stopped about two hours before the party!) so I’m not going to gripe about the weather. Any more. At least not out loud.
And let me say up front that there is no way my Geocities site can support all these photos at once, for long periods of time, so if you can’t see all the pictures, please visit the site again later. Those pesky little red x’s should be gone eventually.
We knew the party was off to a great start when we blew a fuse heating up the hot dogs … er, I mean, chicken cordon bleu, in the microwave(s). Thank goodness none of the kids were in the bounce house when it collapsed. You can tell by the excitement on my nephew Lawson’s face that this was the coolest part of the entire celebration.
The TRUE miracle of Christmas was that I was able to stand up in front of 75 guests and give a welcome speech without vomiting or fainting. My speech started out like this: “If you had asked me prior to October 13, 2003, what my biggest fear was, I would have told you -- honestly -- public speaking. On that day, the day Kendrie was diagnosed with leukemia, my priorities certainly changed and I learned about real fear. But if you were to ask me today, I could tell you -- honestly -- that standing up in front of a crowd and talking is STILL in the Top Three, so bear with me while I fumble my way through this.” (Notice my pink Julianna-Banana wish bracelets on my wrist? Kendrie is done with treatment, but Julianna still has a few months to go, and those bracelets aren't coming off yet!)
Blaine and I wanted our guests to know how very, VERY much we appreciated them joining us for the party, so I sucked it up and talked. Not well, but I did it. We had friends who were local, including four of the teachers from Kendrie’s school, friends who came down from Atlanta (part of our “cancer crowd”), friends who came up from Moultrie (also part of our “cancer crowd”), friends who drove up from Florida, friends who drove down (over?) from Virginia, friends who were here from Maryland, my family who came from Oklahoma, and my best friend Kim who surprised me by showing up on my doorstep the night before the party from Ohio. Not only that, but she came bearing four gallons of ice cream. Now I ask you, is that a best friend or what?!?!?
We also wanted to do something to let Brayden and Kellen know how proud we were of them and all they went through themselves during Kendrie’s treatment. This part of my speech went something like this: “You’ve been dumped off at friend’s houses, left with grandma, and learned the meaning of after-school care. You’ve stuck up for Kendrie at school, hung out with her at home, and definitely gotten the short end of the stick the past two years …. Etc.”
So we bought them trophies that said, respectively, “Brayden Escoe, December 15, 2005, World’s Best Big Sister”. Kellen, especially, seemed to like his. At least he hoisted it overhead like it was an Olympic medal, so either he liked it, or his arm really needed some exercise.
And then I called Kendrie up. I have no idea what I said to her because I was practically hyperventilating at this point (have I mentioned I have a real fear of public speaking?) But she really liked her trophy and has it sitting on a place on honor in her bedroom.
Then, because we wanted to acknowledge all the kids there who have fought the same fight as Kendrie, we passed out medals that said, “No #1, I’m an Official Cancer Butt-Kicker” to Brandon, Brady, Mary Grace, and Chandler. We were sad that several of our other friends from this pediatric cancer world got sick and couldn’t join us, but I have the medals and plan to send them on to you all this week! We know you were there in thought.
Then, in order to thank all of the kids there …. whether they lived far away and sent Kendrie cards, or hung out with her at school, or invited us to their houses to play … they all helped her to have as normal of two years as is possible to have when you’re undergoing chemotherapy. So we gave all of them the following buttons to wear:
(Wow, I didn't do a very good job re-sizing this photo, did I?)
This is when I realized that I had used the word “Butt” an awful lot at this party. I mean, did you see our family shirts?
Kendrie's says, "I'm a Survivor; I kicked Cancer's Butt". Mine and Blaine's both say "Our Daughter Kicked Cancer's Butt" and Brayden and Kellen's both say, "My Sister Kicked Cancer's Butt". If you're interested, we ordered them at cafepress.com.
So to all the parents at the party, my sincere apologies that I sent your child home with a party favor that had the word “butt” on it. Really, my bad.
Then, on to the entertainment of the day (in case my speech wasn’t as entertaining as I had hoped when I practiced it in the shower that morning, ha!) we had a magician come and perform. He’s really good, and has a great sense of humor. I think the kids and adults alike enjoyed it, except my brother-in-law Cliff, who was determined to figure out each and every trick. (Cliff, I’m telling you, I don’t know *how* he got all eleven coins back in my hand!)
The perk of being the “party girl of honor” is that you get called up with your brother and sister, and cousin, for almost every single trick! I don't know if you can tell it in this photo, but Kendrie was cracking up. Normally when she is in front of other people, she pulls the incredibly annoying "I'm so bashful I'm going to bury my face in my mother's big fat thigh" routine. But here, she was in her element and loved every single minute of it.
Then, on to what was the highlight of the party for me: letting Kendrie throw her leftover chemo pills in the lake! Er, pond. Well, ok, big ole’ puddle of rain water. But it worked! (Guess I should be grateful for that rain after all, since it meant we didn’t have to schlep over to the other lake.)
“Seriously, you’re going to let me throw this in the water????”
Kendrie gets ready to throw……………..
Kendrie throwing pills (if you look in the bottom right hand corner of the photo, you can see the pills flying through the air) …………
The remains of the pills, floating in the puddle. I should point out that my mom was freaking out that if we threw the pills in the “real” lake, a fish would eat them, then someone would catch the fish and take it home and fry it and feed it to their family, then the entire family would start glowing or something. So I’m sure my mom was exceptionally happy that we threw them in a puddle, instead. I’m quite positive that once they re-fill the lake next spring, whatever plant life grows in that one spot will be very large, and very green.
Anyway, the rest of the party was all about eating (hot dogs and chips, soda, and a big ole; make-your-own-sundae bar …. Are we high-class or what?) chatting, and watching the kids enjoy the moonwalk.
A few other fun things we did: I filled a jar with M&Ms to represent the number of chemo pills Kendrie took during treatment, then we let everyone take a guess and gave the jar to the person who guessed closest: The winner: (no cheating involved, I swear) my nephew Dalton …. the actual number of pills: 2121.
We also posted a few questions to see who might know the answers (it was funny to me that the other ALL mom at the party said to me, “You know, those questions were pretty easy” --- for her, I’m sure they were, ha!)
1. Number of ambulance rides Kendrie has taken: Two.
2. Number of days she has been inpatient during treatment: Twenty-five.
3. Number of times she has been stuck in the chest, arm, or leg, for flu shots, peg shots, arac shots, blood draws, or chemo: 115.
4. Number of blood transfusions she has received during treatment: Eight.
5. Her preventative antibiotic, Bactrim, she takes in a liquid form. How much has she taken over the past twenty-six months? Three and a half gallons.
Those sorts of questions …. I don’t know if anyone else found them interesting, but some of the numbers surprised me when I went back through her treatment protocol and added them up. Bear in mind that the 2121 pills she has swallowed is a fairly LOW number in comparison to other ALL kids. Chemo is based on weight, and obviously, lots of kids on treatment are older and heavier than her, so they get more pills. Also, Kendrie is a girl, which means one year less of treatment than the boys get (and not because they are stinky, like it says above, but because the testicles are sanctuary sites for leukemia cells) and like I mentioned earlier, she took her Bactrim in liquid form, not pills. So if *you* ever get invited to an Off-Treatment party and they play the M&M challenge ….. remember Kendrie was at 2121 and you’ll probably want to guess up from there! (Who would have imagined that taking over two thousand pills in two years would be a LOW number?)
And that was pretty much the party in a nutshell. Thanks to the guys who helped load up the cars afterwards, and helped put away the moonwalk, thanks to Susan and Ray for helping put away the chairs, thanks to Renee for the potato salad, thanks to Renee and Erin and I’m not sure who else for putting together all the hot dogs while I sat on my keister and visited with people, thanks to Andrea and Kelly and Kim and BoBo for being on picture patrol, thanks to everyone who made the effort to come to the party. … especially those of you who gave up an entire day, or entire weekend, to join us! Thanks to Postcard Cindy for the providing the sundae bar, thanks to everyone for their donations for Caringbridge and CureSearch (even though lots of you completely ignored my NO GIFTS rule!)
I know there is more, and that the second I hit the “post new journal” button I’ll remember and feel bad because I left someone out. But for now, thanks, thanks, thanks!
Kristie
I feel slightly like a teller of “tall tales” to call the past twenty-six months of our life “troubled water”. Oh, sure, the first two months after Kendrie’s leukemia diagnosis were rough and choppy … it felt pretty much like being rushed downstream of a swollen river, not willingly, by the way, without a life jacket, going under and gulping for air, and crashing into uprooted, floating trees and churning, bloated animal carcasses, all the while terrified that when you turned round the next bend, there would be a giant, rushing waterfall just waiting to suck you over and plunge your defenseless body down onto the slippery, pointed, jagged rocks below. You know, something like that. If I were prone to exaggeration. Or whatever.
Once we got past the first two months of induction and consolidation, however, we were lucky. We were pretty much able to tread water for the next two years with very little in the way of turbulence. But that in NO way stopped the outpouring of love and care we received from strangers, friends, and strangers who *became* friends. To say you were our “bridge over troubled water” is like calling Paris Hilton “slightly” ego-centric. Our friends and supports weren’t a simple bridge. You have been the Golden Gate Suspension Bridge of our lives!
I want to thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for all the wonderful notes, e-mails, guestbook messages, cards, care packages and gifts you have sent our family. I tried answering every single one personally, but just ran out of time before it seemed like it had been “too” long. I’m still working on the official thank you notes, but wanted to take this chance to publicly thank all of you for your kindness. Add in the fact Christmas was just a week later, and my kids are basically rolling in it. Short of winning the lottery (which will be difficult since we don’t *play* the lottery) they will probably never have another year like this one, so I sure hope they appreciate it as much as I do! Thanks to all of you.
Now, it's almost two weeks after the fact, but better late than never, right? Here are the photos and details of Kendrie’s Off-Treatment Party, which I am happy to say was a complete success. Well, I suppose I shouldn’t speak for the guests, some of whom drove ten, a hundred, or a thousand miles to be with us …… but *I* had a great time! My only complaint about the entire day was that it was a little bit cool and damp. BUT! My specific prayer was for “no rain” and I got that (it stopped about two hours before the party!) so I’m not going to gripe about the weather. Any more. At least not out loud.
And let me say up front that there is no way my Geocities site can support all these photos at once, for long periods of time, so if you can’t see all the pictures, please visit the site again later. Those pesky little red x’s should be gone eventually.
We knew the party was off to a great start when we blew a fuse heating up the hot dogs … er, I mean, chicken cordon bleu, in the microwave(s). Thank goodness none of the kids were in the bounce house when it collapsed. You can tell by the excitement on my nephew Lawson’s face that this was the coolest part of the entire celebration.
The TRUE miracle of Christmas was that I was able to stand up in front of 75 guests and give a welcome speech without vomiting or fainting. My speech started out like this: “If you had asked me prior to October 13, 2003, what my biggest fear was, I would have told you -- honestly -- public speaking. On that day, the day Kendrie was diagnosed with leukemia, my priorities certainly changed and I learned about real fear. But if you were to ask me today, I could tell you -- honestly -- that standing up in front of a crowd and talking is STILL in the Top Three, so bear with me while I fumble my way through this.” (Notice my pink Julianna-Banana wish bracelets on my wrist? Kendrie is done with treatment, but Julianna still has a few months to go, and those bracelets aren't coming off yet!)
Blaine and I wanted our guests to know how very, VERY much we appreciated them joining us for the party, so I sucked it up and talked. Not well, but I did it. We had friends who were local, including four of the teachers from Kendrie’s school, friends who came down from Atlanta (part of our “cancer crowd”), friends who came up from Moultrie (also part of our “cancer crowd”), friends who drove up from Florida, friends who drove down (over?) from Virginia, friends who were here from Maryland, my family who came from Oklahoma, and my best friend Kim who surprised me by showing up on my doorstep the night before the party from Ohio. Not only that, but she came bearing four gallons of ice cream. Now I ask you, is that a best friend or what?!?!?
We also wanted to do something to let Brayden and Kellen know how proud we were of them and all they went through themselves during Kendrie’s treatment. This part of my speech went something like this: “You’ve been dumped off at friend’s houses, left with grandma, and learned the meaning of after-school care. You’ve stuck up for Kendrie at school, hung out with her at home, and definitely gotten the short end of the stick the past two years …. Etc.”
So we bought them trophies that said, respectively, “Brayden Escoe, December 15, 2005, World’s Best Big Sister”. Kellen, especially, seemed to like his. At least he hoisted it overhead like it was an Olympic medal, so either he liked it, or his arm really needed some exercise.
And then I called Kendrie up. I have no idea what I said to her because I was practically hyperventilating at this point (have I mentioned I have a real fear of public speaking?) But she really liked her trophy and has it sitting on a place on honor in her bedroom.
Then, because we wanted to acknowledge all the kids there who have fought the same fight as Kendrie, we passed out medals that said, “No #1, I’m an Official Cancer Butt-Kicker” to Brandon, Brady, Mary Grace, and Chandler. We were sad that several of our other friends from this pediatric cancer world got sick and couldn’t join us, but I have the medals and plan to send them on to you all this week! We know you were there in thought.
Then, in order to thank all of the kids there …. whether they lived far away and sent Kendrie cards, or hung out with her at school, or invited us to their houses to play … they all helped her to have as normal of two years as is possible to have when you’re undergoing chemotherapy. So we gave all of them the following buttons to wear:
(Wow, I didn't do a very good job re-sizing this photo, did I?)
This is when I realized that I had used the word “Butt” an awful lot at this party. I mean, did you see our family shirts?
Kendrie's says, "I'm a Survivor; I kicked Cancer's Butt". Mine and Blaine's both say "Our Daughter Kicked Cancer's Butt" and Brayden and Kellen's both say, "My Sister Kicked Cancer's Butt". If you're interested, we ordered them at cafepress.com.
So to all the parents at the party, my sincere apologies that I sent your child home with a party favor that had the word “butt” on it. Really, my bad.
Then, on to the entertainment of the day (in case my speech wasn’t as entertaining as I had hoped when I practiced it in the shower that morning, ha!) we had a magician come and perform. He’s really good, and has a great sense of humor. I think the kids and adults alike enjoyed it, except my brother-in-law Cliff, who was determined to figure out each and every trick. (Cliff, I’m telling you, I don’t know *how* he got all eleven coins back in my hand!)
The perk of being the “party girl of honor” is that you get called up with your brother and sister, and cousin, for almost every single trick! I don't know if you can tell it in this photo, but Kendrie was cracking up. Normally when she is in front of other people, she pulls the incredibly annoying "I'm so bashful I'm going to bury my face in my mother's big fat thigh" routine. But here, she was in her element and loved every single minute of it.
Then, on to what was the highlight of the party for me: letting Kendrie throw her leftover chemo pills in the lake! Er, pond. Well, ok, big ole’ puddle of rain water. But it worked! (Guess I should be grateful for that rain after all, since it meant we didn’t have to schlep over to the other lake.)
“Seriously, you’re going to let me throw this in the water????”
Kendrie gets ready to throw……………..
Kendrie throwing pills (if you look in the bottom right hand corner of the photo, you can see the pills flying through the air) …………
The remains of the pills, floating in the puddle. I should point out that my mom was freaking out that if we threw the pills in the “real” lake, a fish would eat them, then someone would catch the fish and take it home and fry it and feed it to their family, then the entire family would start glowing or something. So I’m sure my mom was exceptionally happy that we threw them in a puddle, instead. I’m quite positive that once they re-fill the lake next spring, whatever plant life grows in that one spot will be very large, and very green.
Anyway, the rest of the party was all about eating (hot dogs and chips, soda, and a big ole; make-your-own-sundae bar …. Are we high-class or what?) chatting, and watching the kids enjoy the moonwalk.
A few other fun things we did: I filled a jar with M&Ms to represent the number of chemo pills Kendrie took during treatment, then we let everyone take a guess and gave the jar to the person who guessed closest: The winner: (no cheating involved, I swear) my nephew Dalton …. the actual number of pills: 2121.
We also posted a few questions to see who might know the answers (it was funny to me that the other ALL mom at the party said to me, “You know, those questions were pretty easy” --- for her, I’m sure they were, ha!)
1. Number of ambulance rides Kendrie has taken: Two.
2. Number of days she has been inpatient during treatment: Twenty-five.
3. Number of times she has been stuck in the chest, arm, or leg, for flu shots, peg shots, arac shots, blood draws, or chemo: 115.
4. Number of blood transfusions she has received during treatment: Eight.
5. Her preventative antibiotic, Bactrim, she takes in a liquid form. How much has she taken over the past twenty-six months? Three and a half gallons.
Those sorts of questions …. I don’t know if anyone else found them interesting, but some of the numbers surprised me when I went back through her treatment protocol and added them up. Bear in mind that the 2121 pills she has swallowed is a fairly LOW number in comparison to other ALL kids. Chemo is based on weight, and obviously, lots of kids on treatment are older and heavier than her, so they get more pills. Also, Kendrie is a girl, which means one year less of treatment than the boys get (and not because they are stinky, like it says above, but because the testicles are sanctuary sites for leukemia cells) and like I mentioned earlier, she took her Bactrim in liquid form, not pills. So if *you* ever get invited to an Off-Treatment party and they play the M&M challenge ….. remember Kendrie was at 2121 and you’ll probably want to guess up from there! (Who would have imagined that taking over two thousand pills in two years would be a LOW number?)
And that was pretty much the party in a nutshell. Thanks to the guys who helped load up the cars afterwards, and helped put away the moonwalk, thanks to Susan and Ray for helping put away the chairs, thanks to Renee for the potato salad, thanks to Renee and Erin and I’m not sure who else for putting together all the hot dogs while I sat on my keister and visited with people, thanks to Andrea and Kelly and Kim and BoBo for being on picture patrol, thanks to everyone who made the effort to come to the party. … especially those of you who gave up an entire day, or entire weekend, to join us! Thanks to Postcard Cindy for the providing the sundae bar, thanks to everyone for their donations for Caringbridge and CureSearch (even though lots of you completely ignored my NO GIFTS rule!)
I know there is more, and that the second I hit the “post new journal” button I’ll remember and feel bad because I left someone out. But for now, thanks, thanks, thanks!
Kristie
Monday, December 26, 2005
THE DAY AFTER (AKA; THE MADNESS HAS ENDED)
Day 11 OT
Signs you have had a successful family Christmas celebration:
1. Your children happily and merrily pose for pictures in their new matching Christmas jammies. Smiling, loving, caring, affectionate. Children who feel the peace in their hear ---- Oh, who are we kidding? They were just delirious with joy that there was only twelve hours left until time to open presents.
2. In an attempt to pass the hours until bed-time, the children quietly and peaceably play several rounds of Go-Fish. You didn’t even know they knew HOW to play Go-Fish, but it bought you half an hour of peace and quiet, so it was great in your book.
3. You feel the delight in your heart that your children still believe in the magic of setting out Reindeer Food on Christmas Eve. Well, your youngest two, anyway. You lost the Miracle of Santa with the oldest this year, thanks to two cousins who shall remain nameless.
4. The children enjoy opening presents so much they are able to stop and approve of one another’s bounty with selfless admiration. For about an hour, then the jealousy and bickering starts in because “he got the blue one and that’s the book *I* wanted, etc, etc.”
You know you’ve failed miserably as a Christmas parent when:
1. You come downstairs Christmas morning and catch your oldest sneaking hits on the world’s biggest bong. Oh, no, wait. It’s a marshmallow gun. Cool, huh?
2. Your middle child doesn’t even make it to noon before asking, “Is Santa already watching us for next year, or is today a freebie?”
3. Not 24 hours after the beauty of the holiday has ended, you are already a screaming lunatic, threatening to take everything they got and throw it in the trash if they won’t pick up ONE DAMN THING RIGHT NOW!!!!
Ahhhhhhh. Only 364 days until we get to do it all again. :)
Hope yours was jolly, as well,
Kristie
************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY: In an attempt to expose my children to a little bit of cinematic culture, I bought Brayden a copy of “The Sound of Music” as a gift this year. She and I were watching it this morning while Kellen and Kendrie played in the other room. Suddenly, the gazebo scene with Lisle and Rolph comes on, and the actors are singing, “I am sixteen, going on seventeen……” and my younger two came running in the room, hollering, “The Pacifier, The Pacifier! Hey, that song is from The Pacifier!” Vin Diesel v. Julie Andrews???? Oh well, so much for culture.
Signs you have had a successful family Christmas celebration:
1. Your children happily and merrily pose for pictures in their new matching Christmas jammies. Smiling, loving, caring, affectionate. Children who feel the peace in their hear ---- Oh, who are we kidding? They were just delirious with joy that there was only twelve hours left until time to open presents.
2. In an attempt to pass the hours until bed-time, the children quietly and peaceably play several rounds of Go-Fish. You didn’t even know they knew HOW to play Go-Fish, but it bought you half an hour of peace and quiet, so it was great in your book.
3. You feel the delight in your heart that your children still believe in the magic of setting out Reindeer Food on Christmas Eve. Well, your youngest two, anyway. You lost the Miracle of Santa with the oldest this year, thanks to two cousins who shall remain nameless.
4. The children enjoy opening presents so much they are able to stop and approve of one another’s bounty with selfless admiration. For about an hour, then the jealousy and bickering starts in because “he got the blue one and that’s the book *I* wanted, etc, etc.”
You know you’ve failed miserably as a Christmas parent when:
1. You come downstairs Christmas morning and catch your oldest sneaking hits on the world’s biggest bong. Oh, no, wait. It’s a marshmallow gun. Cool, huh?
2. Your middle child doesn’t even make it to noon before asking, “Is Santa already watching us for next year, or is today a freebie?”
3. Not 24 hours after the beauty of the holiday has ended, you are already a screaming lunatic, threatening to take everything they got and throw it in the trash if they won’t pick up ONE DAMN THING RIGHT NOW!!!!
Ahhhhhhh. Only 364 days until we get to do it all again. :)
Hope yours was jolly, as well,
Kristie
************************************************
QUOTE OF THE DAY: In an attempt to expose my children to a little bit of cinematic culture, I bought Brayden a copy of “The Sound of Music” as a gift this year. She and I were watching it this morning while Kellen and Kendrie played in the other room. Suddenly, the gazebo scene with Lisle and Rolph comes on, and the actors are singing, “I am sixteen, going on seventeen……” and my younger two came running in the room, hollering, “The Pacifier, The Pacifier! Hey, that song is from The Pacifier!” Vin Diesel v. Julie Andrews???? Oh well, so much for culture.
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Christmas Letters, 2005
Merry Christmas, 2005
Well, it’s that time of year again --- wrapping gifts, baking cookies, singing carols with our angelic-voiced children, sipping hot cocoa by a roaring fire while my family harmoniously watches “A Christmas Story” together, tucked under a warm flannel blanket --- and obviously, lying and fabricating things for our annual Christmas letter, so that we sound like a happy and functional family. :)
This has been a year of ups and downs for the Escoe family: Blaine and I finally traveled to Seattle in March for his major reconstructive surgery (two YEARS after he was originally diagnosed) UP; Blaine contracted a staph infection after the surgery and had to have six weeks of self-administered IV antibiotics, and two additional surgeries to clean up his leg, DOWN. The Seattle surgery wasn’t a complete success, DOWN; so he traveled to Augusta for corrective surgery this fall, UP. *That* surgery wasn’t successful, either, DOWN; but his doctors reassure us they can fix everything in the spring (Perhaps back out to Seattle we will go --- we’re still hoping for an UP ending to this whole saga!) Kendrie caught a virus that her whacked-out immune system just couldn’t handle and spent two weeks in the hospital this summer, DOWN; all her hair fell out again, DOWN, but we remembered just how cute she is bald, UP! :)
On a sad note, Blaine’s mother Shirley passed away while we were in Seattle … but helping to balance the sad news is the fabulous, excellent report that Kendrie finished her two years and two months of chemotherapy this December the 15th! I have no doubt that Shirley is cheering from above as we head toward that wonderful finish line.
Blaine started a new job this summer …. Doing something for the Air Force; I’m not sure what. Something to do with contracting, or program management, or something. Whatever. He loves it, likes his co-workers and his boss very much, and we put in for yet another extension here in Georgia, which was granted -- we’ll be here until summer of 2008. And with regard to his ongoing, never-ending reconstructive process, well, seriously, I figure it should culminate with the doctors finishing everything, and him finally getting a full set of teeth, about the age of 92, just in time for them to yank them out and give him dentures. I don’t even think he cares anymore, as long as he can work in some hunting and fishing in between surgeries. Funny how “getting rid of his cancer” wound up being the easiest, least-stressful part of this whole process.
I’m doing well; I began another surrogacy journey this year and am currently (depending on when you read this) about 18 weeks pregnant -- just one baby this time. I knew I wanted to do another surrogacy, but waited until Kendrie was close to the end of her treatment so I could give this pregnancy the time and commitment it deserves. I’m happy to say that all is well so far. I also traveled to NYC in August to visit both previous families and their kids, and helped the twins celebrate their 2nd birthday --- I’m so fortunate to be included! Closer to home, I serve on the PTO and volunteer at the kids’ school, but not as much as I did last year. I still haven’t grown a spine or learned to say NO, so now I just avoid making eye contact with as many teachers. Seems to be working for me, so far. I also got a few weekends away for scrapbooking with some of the best girlfriends in the world, so all is good in my neck of the woods.
The kids have been good this year; busy, wonderful, obnoxious, typical kids. Brayden is eight years old and is enjoying 3rd grade. She loves everything about school, except for the days I come to volunteer in her classroom because apparently I am the biggest embarrassment on the planet. She started gymnastics this fall, is in the Ecology Club at school, and loves arts & crafts, “That’s So Raven”, and blue fingernail polish. She is asking for her own phone for Christmas (don’t worry, she’s not getting it!) and I’m worried we are at the top of the very slippery slope of pre-teen-hood, and staring down a giant mountain of hormones and attitude. Good thing she’s so lovable 95 percent of the time, or I’d have to lock her in her room permanently.
Kellen, “Mr. I’m a Boy, All-Boy, unless it involves a spider or a bug within a 50-mile radius, in which case I squeal like a girl at a Jesse McCartney concert” has had a good year. He’s seven now and in the 2nd grade. He still loves recess and lunch best, although he does pretty well in the classroom, too. He played baseball, soccer, and basketball this year and tells us next year he wants to try football and track. The optimistic part of me hopes he will be a well-rounded sportsman; the pessimistic part of me just thinks of all those practices we’ll have to sit through. My only complaint about Kellen is that when he hugs me (thank goodness he’s still willing to hug me in public!) I can rest my chin on the top of his head. Just when did *that* happen, and how can I stop it?
Kendrie, well, where do I start? She is still gender-confused, and wants to legally change her name to either “Nicholas” or “Dash”. Of course, one of those might fit better with the camouflage and Spiderman clothes she insists on wearing every day. She is six, tearing through kindergarten, played t-ball for the first time this past spring, and most recently conquered the tasks of tying her shoes and learning to ride a two-wheeler without training wheels. Now, I realize she might or might not be a little late on those milestones, but considering she spent most of age four lying on the sofa, nauseated from chemo, we’re still pretty stinkin’ proud of her! Now, if we could just get her to knock off the incredibly annoying “baby-talk” that she does all the time, life would be a success.
I realize that lots of people use these annual family update letters to brag and wax nostalgic about all the mah-velous things their fabulous children have done throughout the year. I’d love to go on and on about the brains, beauty and brawn of my three (all true, of course) but it would be remiss of me not to mention that they also seem to have some sort of alternate personality disorder, where all they are capable of doing for long periods of time is fighting, bickering, and arguing with one another. I spend my days half horrified, and half hopeful, that SuperNanny will show up on our doorstep. When I’m not loving them to death, I just want to pinch their little heads off. And that, my friends, is an Honest Christmas Letter. :)
In between the squabbling and skirmishing, we did have some family highlights this year: the Make-A-Wish organization sent us to Disney World for Kendrie’s wish trip, which we enjoyed greatly (when the kids weren’t fighting … do you see a pattern here?) We also spent a long weekend at the beach in Florida with The Lighthouse Family Retreat, and a weekend in Atlanta with Camp Sunshine. We drove to Ohio to visit our friends Kim and Kenny and their four boys this summer, and down to Florida to visit our friends Erin and Joe and their three boys, and take advantage of their easy-beach access. Although we gripe and moan about our kids’ obnoxious behavior, which is even worse when we travel, we sure don’t seem to learn our lesson very well, do we? I guess we’ll keep vacationing and trying until the kids get it right, or until Blaine and I throw our hands up in despair, whichever comes first.
I hope your family had highlights this year, also, in between the daily grind, chores, activities, work, school, and LIFE that seems to speed by so quickly. I give thanks not only for the blessings in our family, but for this time of year when I’m forced to sit back, relax, and ponder the good things. I mean, I HAVE to, if I want to keep pounding out this letter year after year!
Hope yours was fabulous, as well. Lots of love, the Escoes
Well, it’s that time of year again --- wrapping gifts, baking cookies, singing carols with our angelic-voiced children, sipping hot cocoa by a roaring fire while my family harmoniously watches “A Christmas Story” together, tucked under a warm flannel blanket --- and obviously, lying and fabricating things for our annual Christmas letter, so that we sound like a happy and functional family. :)
This has been a year of ups and downs for the Escoe family: Blaine and I finally traveled to Seattle in March for his major reconstructive surgery (two YEARS after he was originally diagnosed) UP; Blaine contracted a staph infection after the surgery and had to have six weeks of self-administered IV antibiotics, and two additional surgeries to clean up his leg, DOWN. The Seattle surgery wasn’t a complete success, DOWN; so he traveled to Augusta for corrective surgery this fall, UP. *That* surgery wasn’t successful, either, DOWN; but his doctors reassure us they can fix everything in the spring (Perhaps back out to Seattle we will go --- we’re still hoping for an UP ending to this whole saga!) Kendrie caught a virus that her whacked-out immune system just couldn’t handle and spent two weeks in the hospital this summer, DOWN; all her hair fell out again, DOWN, but we remembered just how cute she is bald, UP! :)
On a sad note, Blaine’s mother Shirley passed away while we were in Seattle … but helping to balance the sad news is the fabulous, excellent report that Kendrie finished her two years and two months of chemotherapy this December the 15th! I have no doubt that Shirley is cheering from above as we head toward that wonderful finish line.
Blaine started a new job this summer …. Doing something for the Air Force; I’m not sure what. Something to do with contracting, or program management, or something. Whatever. He loves it, likes his co-workers and his boss very much, and we put in for yet another extension here in Georgia, which was granted -- we’ll be here until summer of 2008. And with regard to his ongoing, never-ending reconstructive process, well, seriously, I figure it should culminate with the doctors finishing everything, and him finally getting a full set of teeth, about the age of 92, just in time for them to yank them out and give him dentures. I don’t even think he cares anymore, as long as he can work in some hunting and fishing in between surgeries. Funny how “getting rid of his cancer” wound up being the easiest, least-stressful part of this whole process.
I’m doing well; I began another surrogacy journey this year and am currently (depending on when you read this) about 18 weeks pregnant -- just one baby this time. I knew I wanted to do another surrogacy, but waited until Kendrie was close to the end of her treatment so I could give this pregnancy the time and commitment it deserves. I’m happy to say that all is well so far. I also traveled to NYC in August to visit both previous families and their kids, and helped the twins celebrate their 2nd birthday --- I’m so fortunate to be included! Closer to home, I serve on the PTO and volunteer at the kids’ school, but not as much as I did last year. I still haven’t grown a spine or learned to say NO, so now I just avoid making eye contact with as many teachers. Seems to be working for me, so far. I also got a few weekends away for scrapbooking with some of the best girlfriends in the world, so all is good in my neck of the woods.
The kids have been good this year; busy, wonderful, obnoxious, typical kids. Brayden is eight years old and is enjoying 3rd grade. She loves everything about school, except for the days I come to volunteer in her classroom because apparently I am the biggest embarrassment on the planet. She started gymnastics this fall, is in the Ecology Club at school, and loves arts & crafts, “That’s So Raven”, and blue fingernail polish. She is asking for her own phone for Christmas (don’t worry, she’s not getting it!) and I’m worried we are at the top of the very slippery slope of pre-teen-hood, and staring down a giant mountain of hormones and attitude. Good thing she’s so lovable 95 percent of the time, or I’d have to lock her in her room permanently.
Kellen, “Mr. I’m a Boy, All-Boy, unless it involves a spider or a bug within a 50-mile radius, in which case I squeal like a girl at a Jesse McCartney concert” has had a good year. He’s seven now and in the 2nd grade. He still loves recess and lunch best, although he does pretty well in the classroom, too. He played baseball, soccer, and basketball this year and tells us next year he wants to try football and track. The optimistic part of me hopes he will be a well-rounded sportsman; the pessimistic part of me just thinks of all those practices we’ll have to sit through. My only complaint about Kellen is that when he hugs me (thank goodness he’s still willing to hug me in public!) I can rest my chin on the top of his head. Just when did *that* happen, and how can I stop it?
Kendrie, well, where do I start? She is still gender-confused, and wants to legally change her name to either “Nicholas” or “Dash”. Of course, one of those might fit better with the camouflage and Spiderman clothes she insists on wearing every day. She is six, tearing through kindergarten, played t-ball for the first time this past spring, and most recently conquered the tasks of tying her shoes and learning to ride a two-wheeler without training wheels. Now, I realize she might or might not be a little late on those milestones, but considering she spent most of age four lying on the sofa, nauseated from chemo, we’re still pretty stinkin’ proud of her! Now, if we could just get her to knock off the incredibly annoying “baby-talk” that she does all the time, life would be a success.
I realize that lots of people use these annual family update letters to brag and wax nostalgic about all the mah-velous things their fabulous children have done throughout the year. I’d love to go on and on about the brains, beauty and brawn of my three (all true, of course) but it would be remiss of me not to mention that they also seem to have some sort of alternate personality disorder, where all they are capable of doing for long periods of time is fighting, bickering, and arguing with one another. I spend my days half horrified, and half hopeful, that SuperNanny will show up on our doorstep. When I’m not loving them to death, I just want to pinch their little heads off. And that, my friends, is an Honest Christmas Letter. :)
In between the squabbling and skirmishing, we did have some family highlights this year: the Make-A-Wish organization sent us to Disney World for Kendrie’s wish trip, which we enjoyed greatly (when the kids weren’t fighting … do you see a pattern here?) We also spent a long weekend at the beach in Florida with The Lighthouse Family Retreat, and a weekend in Atlanta with Camp Sunshine. We drove to Ohio to visit our friends Kim and Kenny and their four boys this summer, and down to Florida to visit our friends Erin and Joe and their three boys, and take advantage of their easy-beach access. Although we gripe and moan about our kids’ obnoxious behavior, which is even worse when we travel, we sure don’t seem to learn our lesson very well, do we? I guess we’ll keep vacationing and trying until the kids get it right, or until Blaine and I throw our hands up in despair, whichever comes first.
I hope your family had highlights this year, also, in between the daily grind, chores, activities, work, school, and LIFE that seems to speed by so quickly. I give thanks not only for the blessings in our family, but for this time of year when I’m forced to sit back, relax, and ponder the good things. I mean, I HAVE to, if I want to keep pounding out this letter year after year!
Hope yours was fabulous, as well. Lots of love, the Escoes
Thursday, December 22, 2005
KENDRIE’S BEEN DEPORTED!!
Day 7 OT
You know, we’ve been so busy this past week with family coming in for Kendrie’s OT celebration, and then our early-Christmas, that it’s hard to believe a week has passed already since Kendrie took her last pills. I guess this time of year flies by for everyone (unless you are one of the poor schmucks stuck in a never-ending line at Wal-Mart for last-minute gifts!) What a great feeling though …. one week down, and assuming she lives to be 104 years old, only 5,096 to go before we can quit worrying!
We drove up to Atlanta yesterday afternoon for her pre-op appointment with the surgeon who was removing her port. It was the same doctor who placed the port in her chest at the time of her diagnosis …. He made the comment while examining her, “Wow, I put in one of the baby-ports… the really small ones. How old was she when I did this?” I replied “She had just turned four” and he said, “I’m surprised it held out through the entire treatment and she didn’t need to get another one. You’ve had some extremely good nursing care if they were able to access this tiny thing the entire time!” Um, ok. Good to know, I guess! (But of course we've known all along that Nurse Mary is da bomb!!)
Since we had to be at Day Surgery at 6am (My word, can you believe people actually get up and go to work at that ungodly hour???) we elected to stay overnight in Atlanta for convenience sake. Luckily, we were able to spend the evening having dinner and visiting with our friends the Connors, whose son Brandon recently received the wonderful news ALL CLEAR FOREVER!!! on his previous neuroblastoma diagnosis. If you’re having trouble finding your miracle this Christmas season, go back in Brandon’s journal and read about his cancer journey --- miraculous, indeed, and a great reminder about the blessings that are out there.
Anyway, despite some grumbling from me {understatement} when the alarm in the hotel room went off at 5am, we made it to Day Surgery just fine and the port-removal went off without a hitch. Kendrie was a good sport beforehand and only cried when they were wheeling her bed down to the operating room and I wasn’t allowed to go with her, but the nurse promised to hold her hand while she was being put to sleep and that seemed to make her feel better. At our clinic, I’ve been able to stay with Kendrie for all her spinal taps; and for her previous bone marrow aspirations, which took place under general anesthesia in an operating room, I was allowed to go back with her until she was put to sleep. I’m not sure why this time was different, and she wasn’t very happy about it, but she did ok.
Afterwards, she was groggy and hard to wake up, and fussy. Extremely fussy. {understatement} She gets really pathetic and whiny after any kind of ‘sleepy’ medicine … I’ll have to remind her of that before she heads off to college, won’t I? Nobody likes a sobbing mess at frat parties, "So remember kids, don’t drink alcohol!" (Think she’ll fall for it?)
I did have a surreal moment when I was pushing her in the stroller from Day Surgery to the parking garage. First, the sun was blinding me and I couldn’t find my sunglasses …. Then I realized I was freezing cold …. Then it hit me; it’s sunny, the air is crisp and clean, and we are NOW officially done with cancer! Sure, we were done the first time after the final spinal, and done the second time after the last clinic visit for IV chemo, and done the third time after the last batch of pills at home ……… and yes, we still have to continue seeing her oncologist for follow-ups for the next few years and watching for any late-term side effects from the chemo, yadda, yadda …. But barring any relapse, God forbid, we are now, this time, finally, at long last, for sure, no more do-overs, DONE! And with the port gone, if she runs a fever, I can just fling Tylenol at her and put her back to bed like I do the other two ---- er, um, I mean, soothingly rub her back and press cool compresses to her brow while humming comforting lullabies under my breath. Just like I do the other two. Yeah, that’s what I mean.
But what a great feeling to know that except for some follow up visits and follow up meds, she is finished. How much nicer it is to be at the end of the treatment road, instead of those frightening days at the beginning. I took a deep breath of that cold air this morning, squinted my eyes against the mid-day sun, and said a prayer of thankfulness for all the blessings she has been given. And for the fact I had a close up parking space and didn’t have to push her very far in the stroller. I guess *that* is the perk of arriving at the hospital at 5:45 am!!
Thanks for thinking of us today.
Kristie
*******************************************************
KENDRIE’S PERSPECTIVE:
WORST PART ABOUT HAVING CANCER TODAY: Ok, this really bites. I razz my mom and give her a hard time about things, but I have to admit that she has been like a bulldog throughout this entire process when it comes to me and my irrational hatred of anything sticky -- band aids, tegaderm dressings, surgical tape -- I hate it all! She has almost always been there to remind the nurses not to put any of that crap on me, but today, she was defenseless. The doctor not only covered a big spot on my chest with tegaderm dressing before bringing me out of recovery to her … tegaderm, the REALLY sticky kind, but I have to leave it on for four to five days! Something about germs, and keeping it dry ….. stinks, stinks, STINKS! I was NOT happy when I woke up from my surgery and found that on my chest. The IV in my hand, I was ok with, the E.T. light on my finger, I was ok with. I think I've proved through the last two years that I can put up with a lot of junk! But this tape crap has GOT TO GO!!!
You know, we’ve been so busy this past week with family coming in for Kendrie’s OT celebration, and then our early-Christmas, that it’s hard to believe a week has passed already since Kendrie took her last pills. I guess this time of year flies by for everyone (unless you are one of the poor schmucks stuck in a never-ending line at Wal-Mart for last-minute gifts!) What a great feeling though …. one week down, and assuming she lives to be 104 years old, only 5,096 to go before we can quit worrying!
We drove up to Atlanta yesterday afternoon for her pre-op appointment with the surgeon who was removing her port. It was the same doctor who placed the port in her chest at the time of her diagnosis …. He made the comment while examining her, “Wow, I put in one of the baby-ports… the really small ones. How old was she when I did this?” I replied “She had just turned four” and he said, “I’m surprised it held out through the entire treatment and she didn’t need to get another one. You’ve had some extremely good nursing care if they were able to access this tiny thing the entire time!” Um, ok. Good to know, I guess! (But of course we've known all along that Nurse Mary is da bomb!!)
Since we had to be at Day Surgery at 6am (My word, can you believe people actually get up and go to work at that ungodly hour???) we elected to stay overnight in Atlanta for convenience sake. Luckily, we were able to spend the evening having dinner and visiting with our friends the Connors, whose son Brandon recently received the wonderful news ALL CLEAR FOREVER!!! on his previous neuroblastoma diagnosis. If you’re having trouble finding your miracle this Christmas season, go back in Brandon’s journal and read about his cancer journey --- miraculous, indeed, and a great reminder about the blessings that are out there.
Anyway, despite some grumbling from me {understatement} when the alarm in the hotel room went off at 5am, we made it to Day Surgery just fine and the port-removal went off without a hitch. Kendrie was a good sport beforehand and only cried when they were wheeling her bed down to the operating room and I wasn’t allowed to go with her, but the nurse promised to hold her hand while she was being put to sleep and that seemed to make her feel better. At our clinic, I’ve been able to stay with Kendrie for all her spinal taps; and for her previous bone marrow aspirations, which took place under general anesthesia in an operating room, I was allowed to go back with her until she was put to sleep. I’m not sure why this time was different, and she wasn’t very happy about it, but she did ok.
Afterwards, she was groggy and hard to wake up, and fussy. Extremely fussy. {understatement} She gets really pathetic and whiny after any kind of ‘sleepy’ medicine … I’ll have to remind her of that before she heads off to college, won’t I? Nobody likes a sobbing mess at frat parties, "So remember kids, don’t drink alcohol!" (Think she’ll fall for it?)
I did have a surreal moment when I was pushing her in the stroller from Day Surgery to the parking garage. First, the sun was blinding me and I couldn’t find my sunglasses …. Then I realized I was freezing cold …. Then it hit me; it’s sunny, the air is crisp and clean, and we are NOW officially done with cancer! Sure, we were done the first time after the final spinal, and done the second time after the last clinic visit for IV chemo, and done the third time after the last batch of pills at home ……… and yes, we still have to continue seeing her oncologist for follow-ups for the next few years and watching for any late-term side effects from the chemo, yadda, yadda …. But barring any relapse, God forbid, we are now, this time, finally, at long last, for sure, no more do-overs, DONE! And with the port gone, if she runs a fever, I can just fling Tylenol at her and put her back to bed like I do the other two ---- er, um, I mean, soothingly rub her back and press cool compresses to her brow while humming comforting lullabies under my breath. Just like I do the other two. Yeah, that’s what I mean.
But what a great feeling to know that except for some follow up visits and follow up meds, she is finished. How much nicer it is to be at the end of the treatment road, instead of those frightening days at the beginning. I took a deep breath of that cold air this morning, squinted my eyes against the mid-day sun, and said a prayer of thankfulness for all the blessings she has been given. And for the fact I had a close up parking space and didn’t have to push her very far in the stroller. I guess *that* is the perk of arriving at the hospital at 5:45 am!!
Thanks for thinking of us today.
Kristie
*******************************************************
KENDRIE’S PERSPECTIVE:
WORST PART ABOUT HAVING CANCER TODAY: Ok, this really bites. I razz my mom and give her a hard time about things, but I have to admit that she has been like a bulldog throughout this entire process when it comes to me and my irrational hatred of anything sticky -- band aids, tegaderm dressings, surgical tape -- I hate it all! She has almost always been there to remind the nurses not to put any of that crap on me, but today, she was defenseless. The doctor not only covered a big spot on my chest with tegaderm dressing before bringing me out of recovery to her … tegaderm, the REALLY sticky kind, but I have to leave it on for four to five days! Something about germs, and keeping it dry ….. stinks, stinks, STINKS! I was NOT happy when I woke up from my surgery and found that on my chest. The IV in my hand, I was ok with, the E.T. light on my finger, I was ok with. I think I've proved through the last two years that I can put up with a lot of junk! But this tape crap has GOT TO GO!!!
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
TOOTH FAIRY, ANYONE?
Day 5 OT
OK, just a quick update from us ….. I am so happy to report the OT party went well (NO RAIN, NO RAIN, NO RAIN!!!) and I just need a few minutes to go through my photos and organize my thoughts before I update about it (well, considering it’s MY thought process we're talking about, maybe more like half an hour will be necessary!) but things have been crazy-busy-wonderful here.
We are enjoying our OKC cousins visit to the nth degree, and have been trying to see everyone we want to see and do everything we want to do and go everywhere we want to go, all in the five days that we have. Add in the fact we had friends come for the party from Florida, Virginia, and Ohio, and there just aren’t enough hours in the day! But I will get some photos put up on this site in the next day or two.
In the meantime, BIG NEWS ANNOUNCEMENT: Kendrie lost her first tooth last night at Stone Mountain! Right in the middle of “Emily’s Magic Christmas Experience” show; I’m pretty sure the most magical moment of *that* performance was the look of joy on her face when it popped out (helped by the Frisbee-sized lollipop she’d been sucking on for an hour).
Also, please keep her in your thoughts as she and I head to Atlanta for her port-removal surgery on Thursday morning. I *know* that it’s a relatively minor procedure … I *know* it’s done on an outpatient basis and we’ll be home before dinner ….. I *know* kids have this done all the time. But still, when it’s YOUR child’s name and the words “general anesthesia” mentioned in the same conversation, it’s enough to make any mild-mannered parent nervous, let alone a full-fledged paranoid-freak like me! Oh, well, at least we don't have to worry about the breathing tube knocking her tooth out during the surgery --- it's gone! (Although she is eagerly working on the next tooth already!)
OK, well, I’m off to start the turkey and dressing … it might only be the 20th, but we are having Christmas here today …. Seven kids under the age of ten …. Gifts …. Sweets and treats …. the frenzy of present-unwrapping that will take place later today … the mess ... the noise.... the fun.... the frivolity …. Oh, dear, someone just pass me the Tylenol now.
Hope your week is going great,
Kristie
PS Several of you asked for the name of that beautiful song (lullaby?) that was in the site previously. It should come as no surprise to you that it's TSO (yet again!) "A Final Dream" off their Beethoven's Last Night cd. I'm asking you, could I love that group any more???
******************************************************
KENDRIE’S PERSPECTIVE:
WORST PART ABOUT HAVING CANCER TODAY: Ha-Ha! I don’t have it anymore!
OK, just a quick update from us ….. I am so happy to report the OT party went well (NO RAIN, NO RAIN, NO RAIN!!!) and I just need a few minutes to go through my photos and organize my thoughts before I update about it (well, considering it’s MY thought process we're talking about, maybe more like half an hour will be necessary!) but things have been crazy-busy-wonderful here.
We are enjoying our OKC cousins visit to the nth degree, and have been trying to see everyone we want to see and do everything we want to do and go everywhere we want to go, all in the five days that we have. Add in the fact we had friends come for the party from Florida, Virginia, and Ohio, and there just aren’t enough hours in the day! But I will get some photos put up on this site in the next day or two.
In the meantime, BIG NEWS ANNOUNCEMENT: Kendrie lost her first tooth last night at Stone Mountain! Right in the middle of “Emily’s Magic Christmas Experience” show; I’m pretty sure the most magical moment of *that* performance was the look of joy on her face when it popped out (helped by the Frisbee-sized lollipop she’d been sucking on for an hour).
Also, please keep her in your thoughts as she and I head to Atlanta for her port-removal surgery on Thursday morning. I *know* that it’s a relatively minor procedure … I *know* it’s done on an outpatient basis and we’ll be home before dinner ….. I *know* kids have this done all the time. But still, when it’s YOUR child’s name and the words “general anesthesia” mentioned in the same conversation, it’s enough to make any mild-mannered parent nervous, let alone a full-fledged paranoid-freak like me! Oh, well, at least we don't have to worry about the breathing tube knocking her tooth out during the surgery --- it's gone! (Although she is eagerly working on the next tooth already!)
OK, well, I’m off to start the turkey and dressing … it might only be the 20th, but we are having Christmas here today …. Seven kids under the age of ten …. Gifts …. Sweets and treats …. the frenzy of present-unwrapping that will take place later today … the mess ... the noise.... the fun.... the frivolity …. Oh, dear, someone just pass me the Tylenol now.
Hope your week is going great,
Kristie
PS Several of you asked for the name of that beautiful song (lullaby?) that was in the site previously. It should come as no surprise to you that it's TSO (yet again!) "A Final Dream" off their Beethoven's Last Night cd. I'm asking you, could I love that group any more???
******************************************************
KENDRIE’S PERSPECTIVE:
WORST PART ABOUT HAVING CANCER TODAY: Ha-Ha! I don’t have it anymore!
Sunday, December 18, 2005
SWEET DREAMS
Day 3 OT
Last night, we put our daughter to bed (well, to “sleeping bag”, anyway) on the living room floor with her siblings and the one cousin who was brave enough to sleep over. For only the second night out of the past 800 or so, we put her to bed without force-feeding her toxic chemicals. Chemicals that I was more than willing to give her, don’t be mistaken, but chemicals nonetheless. Really, how should you feel when the instructions are for the parents to wear gloves and masks, but “here, it’s ok to put it in applesauce and let your kid eat it!”
But not last night. Last night she drank a glass of chocolate milk and curled up next to her cousin ….. sleeping the innocent sleep that a six-yr old deserves. And Blaine and I went to bed, knowing our biggest concern for the evening was that she not wind up in our bed again, especially after watching The (slightly intimidating for a six-yr old, if I do say so myself, especially if your six-yr old is like ours) Chronicles of Narnia.
I love this song. The first time I heard it, I earmarked it for her first night of sleep without chemo. Knowing that in her dreams last night, the moon is her guide, the stars they have kissed her …………… no more chemo, no more cancer ….. safe on a fairy tale stream. Start a new dream, Kendrie, start a new dream.
Last night, we put our daughter to bed (well, to “sleeping bag”, anyway) on the living room floor with her siblings and the one cousin who was brave enough to sleep over. For only the second night out of the past 800 or so, we put her to bed without force-feeding her toxic chemicals. Chemicals that I was more than willing to give her, don’t be mistaken, but chemicals nonetheless. Really, how should you feel when the instructions are for the parents to wear gloves and masks, but “here, it’s ok to put it in applesauce and let your kid eat it!”
But not last night. Last night she drank a glass of chocolate milk and curled up next to her cousin ….. sleeping the innocent sleep that a six-yr old deserves. And Blaine and I went to bed, knowing our biggest concern for the evening was that she not wind up in our bed again, especially after watching The (slightly intimidating for a six-yr old, if I do say so myself, especially if your six-yr old is like ours) Chronicles of Narnia.
I love this song. The first time I heard it, I earmarked it for her first night of sleep without chemo. Knowing that in her dreams last night, the moon is her guide, the stars they have kissed her …………… no more chemo, no more cancer ….. safe on a fairy tale stream. Start a new dream, Kendrie, start a new dream.
Friday, December 16, 2005
A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS. ER, I GUESS IN THIS CASE, A THOUSAND CALORIES.
Day 1 OT
While I realize I had been talking and whooping up the ice-cream experience, and letting everyone know how much Kendrie was looking forward to it, I didn’t understand that perhaps I hadn’t explained it properly, until my sister made a comment to me tonight. My sister, her husband, their four boys, my mom, and my dad all drove in from Oklahoma today to join us for Kendrie’s OT celebration. After a chili supper and bowling (our family is nothing if not highbrow!) we headed straight for the Baskin Robbins in town. As we were sitting and eating our ice cream, my sister made the off-hand comment, “I can’t believe Kendrie has gone a year and a half without eating ice cream!”
OK, obviously, that can’t be true. She sprung from *my* loins, after all, and you can tell by looking at the size of those loins that neither me, nor any child of mine, is going a year and a half (shoot, a week and a half!) without eating ice cream. Uh-uh, nope, not gonna happen.
It’s just that dairy products interfered with her nightly chemo meds, so she wasn’t allowed ice cream, milk, or cheese anytime after dinner each night. For a kid who was accustomed to going to bed with a sippy cup of milk when she was diagnosed, that was a jolt. For a kid who was going through chemotherapy treatment with steroids, whose dex cravings usually consisted of string cheese, cheese slices, or mac and cheese (sometimes all together!) it was just plain cruel and unusual punishment. So more correctly, we simply hadn’t been able to go out as a family and have ice cream as an evening treat.
That changed tonight, though! There I was, taking pictures of her eating ice cream like she had never seen the inside of a Baskin Robbins before. Considering our family drove sixteen hours to join us for this monumental ice cream cone, it was fabulous. Considering three of my sister’s kids are lactose-intolerant, it was actually pretty ironic. But they were good sports, and we were so happy to take part, once again, in one of life’s simpler pleasures: "One scoop of chocolate on a cake cone, please." Then, when we got home, despite the fact there was no way Kendrie could still be hungry, she asked for two cheese slices before bed …. just because she *could*, I’m sure. Now, what was that her oncologist said about girls her age gaining weight when they go off treatment? Surely, I can’t imagine what he means!
“Hmmmmm, decisions, decisions. Yep, I think I’ll go with the plain chocolate.”
“Thank you sir, and please don’t assume that lunatic with the camera is my mother. I have no idea who she is or why she is taking photos.”
All our OKC cousins get into the act!
“You know I’m enjoying it when I can’t be bothered to stop and wipe my mouth”
“Ahhhhh, I’ve waited a long time for that creamy, cold taste of delicious dairy delight …. Can we go again tomorrow night?”
Hope you are all having a good night, also.
While I realize I had been talking and whooping up the ice-cream experience, and letting everyone know how much Kendrie was looking forward to it, I didn’t understand that perhaps I hadn’t explained it properly, until my sister made a comment to me tonight. My sister, her husband, their four boys, my mom, and my dad all drove in from Oklahoma today to join us for Kendrie’s OT celebration. After a chili supper and bowling (our family is nothing if not highbrow!) we headed straight for the Baskin Robbins in town. As we were sitting and eating our ice cream, my sister made the off-hand comment, “I can’t believe Kendrie has gone a year and a half without eating ice cream!”
OK, obviously, that can’t be true. She sprung from *my* loins, after all, and you can tell by looking at the size of those loins that neither me, nor any child of mine, is going a year and a half (shoot, a week and a half!) without eating ice cream. Uh-uh, nope, not gonna happen.
It’s just that dairy products interfered with her nightly chemo meds, so she wasn’t allowed ice cream, milk, or cheese anytime after dinner each night. For a kid who was accustomed to going to bed with a sippy cup of milk when she was diagnosed, that was a jolt. For a kid who was going through chemotherapy treatment with steroids, whose dex cravings usually consisted of string cheese, cheese slices, or mac and cheese (sometimes all together!) it was just plain cruel and unusual punishment. So more correctly, we simply hadn’t been able to go out as a family and have ice cream as an evening treat.
That changed tonight, though! There I was, taking pictures of her eating ice cream like she had never seen the inside of a Baskin Robbins before. Considering our family drove sixteen hours to join us for this monumental ice cream cone, it was fabulous. Considering three of my sister’s kids are lactose-intolerant, it was actually pretty ironic. But they were good sports, and we were so happy to take part, once again, in one of life’s simpler pleasures: "One scoop of chocolate on a cake cone, please." Then, when we got home, despite the fact there was no way Kendrie could still be hungry, she asked for two cheese slices before bed …. just because she *could*, I’m sure. Now, what was that her oncologist said about girls her age gaining weight when they go off treatment? Surely, I can’t imagine what he means!
“Hmmmmm, decisions, decisions. Yep, I think I’ll go with the plain chocolate.”
“Thank you sir, and please don’t assume that lunatic with the camera is my mother. I have no idea who she is or why she is taking photos.”
All our OKC cousins get into the act!
“You know I’m enjoying it when I can’t be bothered to stop and wipe my mouth”
“Ahhhhh, I’ve waited a long time for that creamy, cold taste of delicious dairy delight …. Can we go again tomorrow night?”
Hope you are all having a good night, also.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
WE ARE DONE, BABY, WE ARE DONE --- AND IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY!!!!
KENDRIE KICKED CANCER!
Final Day of Pills --- Starting Tomorrow, No Mo Chemo!!!
Photo taken December 15th, 2005; LAST DAY OF CHEMO!!!!
Diagnosed with ALL in October, 2003, one month after her 4th birthday, Kendrie is a happy, giggly little girl who is a tomboy at heart. She loves playing outside, swimming, riding her bike, building forts, and says when she grows up, she wants to be "a boy". On occasion, though, we catch her playing with dolls (usually GI'Joes), so not all hope is lost yet! :)
Kendrie followed treatment plan CCG 1991, arm D. After twenty-six months of chemotherapy, with relatively little problems or delays, she finished chemo on December 15th, 2005. She will continue to see her oncologist for the next few years for follow ups .... monthly at the beginning, then the visits will begin to stretch out as long as she remains healthy and cancer-free.
*********************************************************************
Wow! Exciting, surreal, bizarre, thrilling, stirring, awesome, dreamlike, odd …. There just aren’t enough adjectives to describe how I felt at 8:17 pm tonight, when Kendrie sucked down those final three pills! What an incredible feeling, and I know she was excited, too! Then I started doing the cabbage patch in the kitchen and her only question was, “You’re not going to take a picture of *THAT*, are you?????”
We had a really great day, all around. Yep, it was a beautiful day! Well, the weather here stunk, so it’s not like we celebrated with a picnic or anything, but we did mark the occasion the best way we know how … with a party! I had approached her kindergarten teacher about bringing in cupcakes or cookies or something today, and the teacher told me yes, she’d been thinking of doing a little something for Kendrie, too, but she’d like for it to be a surprise. Her idea was to title the party “Kendrie Kicked Cancer” and have us bring in snacks that start with the “K” sound …. You know those teachers… always thinking, they are. Me? I’d still be searching for a way to make a party educational, but what can I say? She’s a lot smarter than me.
So I agreed to keep it a secret from Kendrie and went out and bought Cupcakes, Cookies, Candy Corn, and Koolaid Jammers. Now, unbeknownst to me, was the fact that the entire party was a surprise that they were also keeping from me! I showed up today to bring my party supplies, only to discover they had sent notes home with the other kids, who had also brought in treats (they had cherry cheesecake, chips, more cookies than you could shake a stick at, more cupcakes, cashews, candy, cantaloupe, kettle corn, candy canes; those kids could have holed up in that room for a week and not run out of food!) They had decorated the door to the room with posters, the kids had all signed a huge congratulations card, and one of the moms made her a quilt that all the kids got to sign…. and they managed to keep it all a secret from Kendrie. The school nurse came down for the party (I could practically see the relief in her eyes that Kendrie won’t be bothering her all the time now -- although she professed that wasn't the case!) and several of the other kids’ parents came in to help as well, so I didn’t have to do a darn thing. Now, that’s my kind of party!!
They kept Kendrie out of the room for a extra minute and when she walked in, all her classmates yelled “Surprise, Kendrie! We love you!” (which made several of them break out in hysterical giggles) and she got to sit in the seat of honor and open her gift. They really went above and beyond what I thought they would do and I couldn’t have appreciated it more.
Kendrie, opening her blanket and seeing all the names on it. I was very impressed with this, especially seeing how I can't even sew on a button.
Kendrie with her long-time companion, Nicholas, aka Koolaid Mustachio’d Man. Today was also Polar Express Day at school, hence the pajamas and slippers.
After school we were busy running to get haircuts (not hers yet, although she’s already asking for one!) and then going to a PTO meeting tonight where the 2nd graders (Kellen’s class) performed. So by the time we got home for the evening, it was already late and time for the final pills! Then, of course, Kendrie wanted to know if she could have ice cream, since she is now “done with cancer.” Sorry, honey, one more night!
"You mean this is it? This is really and truly it?" I didn't have the heart to remind her she'll still have to take her Singulair and Claritin every night ....
"Ugh, Dad, let's just get it over with!"
Sorry, I couldn't help it. This is the face she has made every night since she started Long-Term Maintenance in Aug of 2004. If anyone ever invents yummy-flavored chemo, they'll make a mint.
*****************************************************
Since we started this morning with ONE DAY TO GO, I thought I would share with you some of the special “Ones” that happened to me today:
**One really stupid thing I did: I went grocery shopping this morning and was pushing the cart when I picked something up with a poor grasp and dropped it. When it fell out of my hands, I thought I broke a fingernail (I know, tragedy) and immediately popped that finger in my mouth because it hurt. Ewwwwwwww! I had my hands all over that cart, all over the store, touching Lord only knows what other people had been touching all day, and I stuck my finger in my mouth without any sort of Purell precaution!!! Disgusting! (Trust me, cancer-parents everywhere are cringing at the very thought … guess we know who’ll be sick for Christmas at our house!)
**One bad parenting moment before I even left the house this morning. You would think, after four years of school, hence four years of getting ready for school each morning, my kids would understand that we have a routine at our house. Breakfast, clothes, teeth, hair. It’s not complicated …. four simple steps. Actually, in general they do really well, which is why mornings like today, when we have to leave the house in three minutes and people still aren’t dressed and can’t find a hairbrush and haven’t brushed their teeth or packed their backpack yet and lost their socks and what have you, it just makes me insane. So after talking at breakfast in my “pleasant, happy mom” voice about what a special, heart-warming day this is for our family, I ruined it before 8am by yelling at my kids to “Get your butts in the car NOW--I don’t care if you have to go to school barefoot --- THAT’S YOUR PROBLEM NOT MINE!!!” Ahhhh, joyful family memories.
**One unexpected welling up of tears --- Kendrie has been in class both years with an adorable little boy named Kobi whose dad is one of the custodians/maintenance men at school. He’s a quiet man and probably hasn’t spoken two words to me ever, besides a passing nod and smile each morning. This morning he was working the drop-off car ramp and since it was raining I decided to drive my kids through instead of walking them in like I usually do. (I know, lazy me.) They were taking a while to get out of the car (still looking for that damn sock, I think) and we were sort of backing up traffic. Kobi’s dad walked over to my car and I rolled down the window, fully expecting him to tell me to pull up and quit blocking the lane. Instead, he looked me right in the face and said, “My wife told me today was Kendrie’s last day of treatment and I just want you to know how happy I am for your whole family …. It’s truly a blessing. I’m really, really pleased for her”. What a kind way to start my day, even if it did make me cry!
**One episode of bad timing: Kendrie’s Polar Express Day was today, Kellen’s was yesterday; pajamas to school, and they get on a decorated bus and drink hot chocolate while the vice-principal reads the story … it’s a really cute tradition at their school. On an unrelated note, every year I buy my kids matching Christmas pajamas and I was disappointed that they hadn’t arrived in time for them to wear them to school for Polar Express Day. Plus, I was annoyed that I had to go buy them new pjs to wear, since theirs are all high-waters and while no on calls them "The Escoe Orphans" to their faces, I figured pajamas that actually fit might not be such a bad idea. So, after buying three brand new pair of pajamas on Tuesday, guess what came in the mail THIS AFTERNOON????
**One unexpected surprise: Walking into Kendrie’s classroom and seeing the other parents there …. Especially her boyfriend Nicholas’s mom and dad. After all, since they are her future in-laws, it’s nice they got to be there to help celebrate such a special day.
**One not-so-serious-but-in-a-way-yes prayer request: After being given such a gift, twenty-six months of chemo with relatively little problems, and reaching this end of treatment, I feel a little selfish asking for more ….. but we’ve got lots of kids coming for a party this weekend and I’ve got footballs and hula hoops and horseshoes and a moonwalk waiting … and they are forecasting 47 degrees and rain. Now, I’ll do my Victory March to the Lake in the rain if I have to, but it would be great if we could get a slight break in the weather for just a few hours that day…. Pretty, pretty please???
**One slightly-more-serious prayer request: As exciting as today was, and as grateful as I am to everyone who helped make it so special (that includes all of YOU by sharing this journey with us) I would really prefer that this be the ONLY TIME EVER that she finishes chemo. In other words, I would love more than anything for her never to have to START chemo again. I am perfectly content to settle into finding our new normal, even if it takes awhile.
Again, thank you all so much for following along this past week or two and leaving such touching messages in the guestbook. It’s truly the icing on the cake, or the cherry on the sundae, or some other sort of "finishing touches" metaphor. The countdown is over …. Although I’ll continue to update, probably daily, at least through the holidays. I hope you guys will be able to keep checking in on us as we segue back into a normal life again. Well, as normal as things get around here, anyway. And if you are willing to keep touching base, dog barf and all, then I’m happy to stick around, too. I certainly check enough CB sites myself, and I’m just as happy to keep Kendrie’s site updated, also. But you guys have to promise to tell me if the updates get too painfully boring. We can have a secret code word you can leave in the guestbook ... like "lobotomy" or "comatose". Or, if I forget to use my spell check on a regular basis. Trust me, THAT is worse than boring!!!
Take care,
Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives … blah blah blah, but doesn’t it ring true? :)))))))))))))) (that is one big happy smiley face!)
Final Day of Pills --- Starting Tomorrow, No Mo Chemo!!!
Photo taken December 15th, 2005; LAST DAY OF CHEMO!!!!
Diagnosed with ALL in October, 2003, one month after her 4th birthday, Kendrie is a happy, giggly little girl who is a tomboy at heart. She loves playing outside, swimming, riding her bike, building forts, and says when she grows up, she wants to be "a boy". On occasion, though, we catch her playing with dolls (usually GI'Joes), so not all hope is lost yet! :)
Kendrie followed treatment plan CCG 1991, arm D. After twenty-six months of chemotherapy, with relatively little problems or delays, she finished chemo on December 15th, 2005. She will continue to see her oncologist for the next few years for follow ups .... monthly at the beginning, then the visits will begin to stretch out as long as she remains healthy and cancer-free.
*********************************************************************
Wow! Exciting, surreal, bizarre, thrilling, stirring, awesome, dreamlike, odd …. There just aren’t enough adjectives to describe how I felt at 8:17 pm tonight, when Kendrie sucked down those final three pills! What an incredible feeling, and I know she was excited, too! Then I started doing the cabbage patch in the kitchen and her only question was, “You’re not going to take a picture of *THAT*, are you?????”
We had a really great day, all around. Yep, it was a beautiful day! Well, the weather here stunk, so it’s not like we celebrated with a picnic or anything, but we did mark the occasion the best way we know how … with a party! I had approached her kindergarten teacher about bringing in cupcakes or cookies or something today, and the teacher told me yes, she’d been thinking of doing a little something for Kendrie, too, but she’d like for it to be a surprise. Her idea was to title the party “Kendrie Kicked Cancer” and have us bring in snacks that start with the “K” sound …. You know those teachers… always thinking, they are. Me? I’d still be searching for a way to make a party educational, but what can I say? She’s a lot smarter than me.
So I agreed to keep it a secret from Kendrie and went out and bought Cupcakes, Cookies, Candy Corn, and Koolaid Jammers. Now, unbeknownst to me, was the fact that the entire party was a surprise that they were also keeping from me! I showed up today to bring my party supplies, only to discover they had sent notes home with the other kids, who had also brought in treats (they had cherry cheesecake, chips, more cookies than you could shake a stick at, more cupcakes, cashews, candy, cantaloupe, kettle corn, candy canes; those kids could have holed up in that room for a week and not run out of food!) They had decorated the door to the room with posters, the kids had all signed a huge congratulations card, and one of the moms made her a quilt that all the kids got to sign…. and they managed to keep it all a secret from Kendrie. The school nurse came down for the party (I could practically see the relief in her eyes that Kendrie won’t be bothering her all the time now -- although she professed that wasn't the case!) and several of the other kids’ parents came in to help as well, so I didn’t have to do a darn thing. Now, that’s my kind of party!!
They kept Kendrie out of the room for a extra minute and when she walked in, all her classmates yelled “Surprise, Kendrie! We love you!” (which made several of them break out in hysterical giggles) and she got to sit in the seat of honor and open her gift. They really went above and beyond what I thought they would do and I couldn’t have appreciated it more.
Kendrie, opening her blanket and seeing all the names on it. I was very impressed with this, especially seeing how I can't even sew on a button.
Kendrie with her long-time companion, Nicholas, aka Koolaid Mustachio’d Man. Today was also Polar Express Day at school, hence the pajamas and slippers.
After school we were busy running to get haircuts (not hers yet, although she’s already asking for one!) and then going to a PTO meeting tonight where the 2nd graders (Kellen’s class) performed. So by the time we got home for the evening, it was already late and time for the final pills! Then, of course, Kendrie wanted to know if she could have ice cream, since she is now “done with cancer.” Sorry, honey, one more night!
"You mean this is it? This is really and truly it?" I didn't have the heart to remind her she'll still have to take her Singulair and Claritin every night ....
"Ugh, Dad, let's just get it over with!"
Sorry, I couldn't help it. This is the face she has made every night since she started Long-Term Maintenance in Aug of 2004. If anyone ever invents yummy-flavored chemo, they'll make a mint.
*****************************************************
Since we started this morning with ONE DAY TO GO, I thought I would share with you some of the special “Ones” that happened to me today:
**One really stupid thing I did: I went grocery shopping this morning and was pushing the cart when I picked something up with a poor grasp and dropped it. When it fell out of my hands, I thought I broke a fingernail (I know, tragedy) and immediately popped that finger in my mouth because it hurt. Ewwwwwwww! I had my hands all over that cart, all over the store, touching Lord only knows what other people had been touching all day, and I stuck my finger in my mouth without any sort of Purell precaution!!! Disgusting! (Trust me, cancer-parents everywhere are cringing at the very thought … guess we know who’ll be sick for Christmas at our house!)
**One bad parenting moment before I even left the house this morning. You would think, after four years of school, hence four years of getting ready for school each morning, my kids would understand that we have a routine at our house. Breakfast, clothes, teeth, hair. It’s not complicated …. four simple steps. Actually, in general they do really well, which is why mornings like today, when we have to leave the house in three minutes and people still aren’t dressed and can’t find a hairbrush and haven’t brushed their teeth or packed their backpack yet and lost their socks and what have you, it just makes me insane. So after talking at breakfast in my “pleasant, happy mom” voice about what a special, heart-warming day this is for our family, I ruined it before 8am by yelling at my kids to “Get your butts in the car NOW--I don’t care if you have to go to school barefoot --- THAT’S YOUR PROBLEM NOT MINE!!!” Ahhhh, joyful family memories.
**One unexpected welling up of tears --- Kendrie has been in class both years with an adorable little boy named Kobi whose dad is one of the custodians/maintenance men at school. He’s a quiet man and probably hasn’t spoken two words to me ever, besides a passing nod and smile each morning. This morning he was working the drop-off car ramp and since it was raining I decided to drive my kids through instead of walking them in like I usually do. (I know, lazy me.) They were taking a while to get out of the car (still looking for that damn sock, I think) and we were sort of backing up traffic. Kobi’s dad walked over to my car and I rolled down the window, fully expecting him to tell me to pull up and quit blocking the lane. Instead, he looked me right in the face and said, “My wife told me today was Kendrie’s last day of treatment and I just want you to know how happy I am for your whole family …. It’s truly a blessing. I’m really, really pleased for her”. What a kind way to start my day, even if it did make me cry!
**One episode of bad timing: Kendrie’s Polar Express Day was today, Kellen’s was yesterday; pajamas to school, and they get on a decorated bus and drink hot chocolate while the vice-principal reads the story … it’s a really cute tradition at their school. On an unrelated note, every year I buy my kids matching Christmas pajamas and I was disappointed that they hadn’t arrived in time for them to wear them to school for Polar Express Day. Plus, I was annoyed that I had to go buy them new pjs to wear, since theirs are all high-waters and while no on calls them "The Escoe Orphans" to their faces, I figured pajamas that actually fit might not be such a bad idea. So, after buying three brand new pair of pajamas on Tuesday, guess what came in the mail THIS AFTERNOON????
**One unexpected surprise: Walking into Kendrie’s classroom and seeing the other parents there …. Especially her boyfriend Nicholas’s mom and dad. After all, since they are her future in-laws, it’s nice they got to be there to help celebrate such a special day.
**One not-so-serious-but-in-a-way-yes prayer request: After being given such a gift, twenty-six months of chemo with relatively little problems, and reaching this end of treatment, I feel a little selfish asking for more ….. but we’ve got lots of kids coming for a party this weekend and I’ve got footballs and hula hoops and horseshoes and a moonwalk waiting … and they are forecasting 47 degrees and rain. Now, I’ll do my Victory March to the Lake in the rain if I have to, but it would be great if we could get a slight break in the weather for just a few hours that day…. Pretty, pretty please???
**One slightly-more-serious prayer request: As exciting as today was, and as grateful as I am to everyone who helped make it so special (that includes all of YOU by sharing this journey with us) I would really prefer that this be the ONLY TIME EVER that she finishes chemo. In other words, I would love more than anything for her never to have to START chemo again. I am perfectly content to settle into finding our new normal, even if it takes awhile.
Again, thank you all so much for following along this past week or two and leaving such touching messages in the guestbook. It’s truly the icing on the cake, or the cherry on the sundae, or some other sort of "finishing touches" metaphor. The countdown is over …. Although I’ll continue to update, probably daily, at least through the holidays. I hope you guys will be able to keep checking in on us as we segue back into a normal life again. Well, as normal as things get around here, anyway. And if you are willing to keep touching base, dog barf and all, then I’m happy to stick around, too. I certainly check enough CB sites myself, and I’m just as happy to keep Kendrie’s site updated, also. But you guys have to promise to tell me if the updates get too painfully boring. We can have a secret code word you can leave in the guestbook ... like "lobotomy" or "comatose". Or, if I forget to use my spell check on a regular basis. Trust me, THAT is worse than boring!!!
Take care,
Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives … blah blah blah, but doesn’t it ring true? :)))))))))))))) (that is one big happy smiley face!)
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