Tuesday, July 10, 2007

MLCV - Day Anchorage Airport

So, we're just sitting here, waiting in the boarding area for our plane to arrive {doing my normal paranoid praying and mumbling and crossing fingers and hyperventilating that we actually arrive in one piece at the end of the flight} and I was just thinking, for no reason, not anything specific, nothing at all prompted this, but I thought I would take an informal poll. Just for fun. Not because anything happened. No reason. Or anything. So please take a moment and answer the following questions, posting your responses and any additional comments you feel are appropriate in the comments section. Thank you.

1. Do you believe there is a difference between REAL cheese and "pastuerized processed cheese FOOD" ??

2. Assuming you DO believe there is a difference, do you think that cheese FOOD is:

a. Disgusting
b. Fake
c. Slimy
d. All of the above

3. If you were in an airport deli, and you asked the deli worker if the cheese they use was real or fake, processed, and he said there was no difference, and then showed you the slices of cheese FOOD he wanted to put on your sandwich, would you:

a. Snort
b. Consider him an idiot
c. Cancel your deli order
d. All of the above

4. If after canceling your deli order you requested a Cinnabon cinnamon roll instead, advertised as "HOT", and after receiving your Cinnabon cinnamon roll you discovered it was not actually "HOT" as advertised, but more of a room-temperature-to-lukewarm, would you consider it rude to request the worker heat it up in the microwave? And for how many additional seconds should it be microwaved to reach optimal, buttery, gooey wonderfulness?


5. Do you imagine during this scenario your husband should stand by you in a show of support, or with an embarrassed look on his face, mutter something under his breath about "high maintenance" and slink off, dragging his carry-on behind him?

Thank you for taking part in our short survey. Your honest opinions and answers are welcome. (As long as they agree with mine. The rest of you are welcome to answer, but please know in advance that you are wrong. Thank you. Good day.)


Daisy Duke said...

I show people in the grocery store the labels on Kraft American Cheese slices so they are fully aware what that extra 79 cents buys them- the difference between cheese food and cheese. Clearly the cheese food product is slimy, disgusting, and not to be eaten.

Kristie said...

Thank you, Daisy. Good to know you are also enlightened as to the truth about the evils of the cheese food. I would like nothing more than to invite you to a real cheese party. Or perhaps we could be the founding members of CSOAI ... Cheese Snobs of America, Inc. :)

Haley said...

I could totally be you. As usual, I spent today at the airport (I get to be the maid of honor in my best friend's wedding on Saturday!!!). Anyways, I had to grab a sandwich at Starbuck's because I had all of 25 minutes to run across the St. Louis airport from Gate C17 to C1, make a potty break, grab lunch, and get on plane #2. I hate prepackaged sandwiches...not just because of the cheese (I only eat fancy cheese, you know the Kraft variety that you have to slice), but because the bread gets soggy, the lettuce stains the bread, and the turkey isn't even. I didn't have a husband to leave me standing there, but I think I drove the people behind me in line crazy as I inspected the quality of 4 different sandwiches before I made my final selection...then I took the cheese off.

p.s. I will mail the books next week when I return from the wedding! :) Both were excellent, but the sequel is a treat to look forward to!

Anonymous said...

Guess what, I don't like cheese, so I have no idea. I tried to feed my children cheese when they were smaller but they never liked it. So no cheese in my house. And as for the cinnabon I have never seen one of those, but I will be on the lookout the next time I am out. We finally did get a Sonic and gosh wouldn't a ddp with pellet ice be great about now? I am sure that Blaine stood beside you and supported you all the way ;)
Bubbles in NC

Jamie said...

Sorry, allergic to dairy here, so I can't help with the cheese conundrum except to say that I'm sure cheese lovers would never choose cheese food over real cheese. Now for the cinnamon roll - heat that sucker up! I'm a picky eater and because of my allergies, hubby's learned to humor me when I ask questions about food.

Anonymous said...

Ok, so here's the deal. Airport food is one step above airline food. Did you really expect to get "real" food in an airport? *shudder*

Heck, event the ball parks around here serve better food than the airports.

As for cheese, nothing like a nice brie or even baby swiss, I love it! Packaged cheese food isn't cheese. It's like comparing an MRE to a home cooked meal. Enough said.


Staci said...

1. Yes i believe there is a HUGE difference between fake and real cheese.
2. fake cheese is good in a rare occasion, say, on a cracker in a package, from a vending machine.. or drizzled on nachos :)
3. if i cared enough about my cheese to ask for real cheese in a deli at the airport i would snort, cancel my order, and consider him an idiot.
4. since i used to work at a snooty coffee shop and have heated many a cinnamon bun i would nuke that puppy for at least 30 seconds-1 minute
5. i love my husband dearly but no. he wouldnt be standing beside me muttering under his breath because his fat ass would probably be somewhere else doing something else to busy with his own world to be concerned what was happening in mine.

ps. fake cheese is only appropriate on a sandwich when it comes out of the plastic wrap and goes inbetween two generously buttered pieces of bread then cooked until "grilled"

Have a safe trip!!

Kathy in Alaska said...

I am 5 minutes from the airport in Anchorage, are you still there? I will come and meet you !


Bec (from Australia) said...

Processed cheese is NOT real cheese I do not think it even closely resembles or tastes like cheese.

However if you are pregnant and throwing up you get two slices of white bread, lots of butter(agreeing with Staci) BUT you have to add vegemite and cut the crusts off and eat three sandwiches. This is the BEST cure for morning sickness.

As for the snooty guy in the shop you have to feel sorry for him after all he thinks that he was serving you real cheese!!!!! He probably think that there is fish in fish fingers and chicken in chicken nuggets. And that fruit is eaten out of a container and Santa is real.

Jen said...

Kristie, sign me up as a card-carrying member of CSOAI, too, because I am a self-admitted cheese snob, only buying my cheese hand sliced at the deli counter. So to answer your first 3 questions, 1. Yes, 2. D - with an added EEW! and 3. D. And the snort would have been pretty loud and would have carried a disdainful smirk with it, too. :)

As for question 4. If they're going to advertise it as "hot", then it had better be "hot", or I will ask that they make me a fresh one or give me a refund. Never mind the microwave. That's why I love Krispy Kreme... they have THE sign... the bright red neon that lets the world know they just finished a new batch of hot fresh glazed goodness. I can't resist the sign. :D

And finally, husbands should always support their wives in the quest for fresh baked goods. It's payback for us supporting them in their various quests. (In David's case, the quest for fresh boiled peanuts, cooked at home, which stinks my house up something awful!)

Tracy said...

Yes, there is a big difference and there is no way I would eat that cheese. But I have to say, I don't think I would request the Cinnabon to be reheated, due to the fact that the worker would probably spit on it.

Just my thoughts!

Anonymous said...

In my opinion, the only use for "processed cheese food" is macaroni and cheese. I've used real cheese (really real...not just fake real) cheese and it gets stringy and kind of bitter (any suggestions?). My sons are cheese lovers, thankfully, but when it comes to macaroni and cheese, if I don't use "processed cheese food" they complain and ask me to use the "really good cheese.....you know, the one from the box that's wrapped nicely in foil." So much for their future fortune on The Food Network.

Hey, I've loved the Alaskan cruise journal. Thank you for sharing! What a wonderful time for Blaine and you! I can imagine how you're looking forward to holding your kiddos in your arms. That will be BLISS! I'm kind of giggling to myself, wondering how long it'll be before you have a my-kids-drive-me-nuts update.

Claire in Indiana

cakeburnette said...

Oh yes, you are so right about there being a difference. Shelby attempted to put a package of that nasty cheese "food" in my buggy on Sunday and I had to remove it and show her the difference. Unfortunately, Mark doesn't know there's a difference and routinely brings that mess home. I secretly throw it out when he's not looking.

Alice said...

Kristie - Funny enough - before I moved into the nonprofit world, I did PR for Cinnabon. And I can tell you that first, their philosophy was always "no longer than 30 minutes out of the oven," which means it should always be hot. And second - if you should have to heat up a Cinnabon cinnamon roll (at home) - you only need to do it for 30 seconds. And if you put a small bowl of water in the microwave with it - it will keep the roll from drying out....
As far as cheese goes - AMEN, sister. I personally would have taken that fake crap and used it to slap the person trying to peddle it.

I have enjoyed reading about your trip. Can't wait to see the pics!

Alice said...

Kristie - Funny enough - before I moved into the nonprofit world, I did PR for Cinnabon. And I can tell you that first, their philosophy was always "no longer than 30 minutes out of the oven," which means it should always be hot. And second - if you should have to heat up a Cinnabon cinnamon roll (at home) - you only need to do it for 30 seconds. And if you put a small bowl of water in the microwave with it - it will keep the roll from drying out....
As far as cheese goes - AMEN, sister. I personally would have taken that fake crap and used it to slap the person trying to peddle it.

I have enjoyed reading about your trip. Can't wait to see the pics!

Jeanette, CSOA member said...

Is it un-American to hate American Cheese? I think not. Although I agree, it is the best when making mac and cheese, but on a sandwich? :( Good for you for insisting on the HOT cinnamon roll! Hope you are missing your kids enough so that you won't be sad leaving Alaska.

The Running Girl said...

Well, considering I no longer eat cheese at all (lactose intolerant), I think it is all disgusting. But back when I did eat cheese, YES, there is a difference. No, you were not rude to request a cinnabon instead and NO, you were not rude to ask that it be heated up. I would have done the same. Hope you have a safe trip home.


Anonymous said...

1. I can tell the difference the moment I put it in my mouth!
2. how about e. sometimes good?
3. all of the above
4. I would want the support but expect the mumbling.

Hope you get to see the new HP movie today!

Atlanta, GA

DebH said...

1. yes there is a difference



4. 30 sec to 1 min

5. definatly slink off

Have a safe trip!

lizinsumner said...

The difference between REAL cheese (which I luuuuurrrvvveee!!) and the fake stuff can be viewed, by US (the true connoisures (did I spell that right??)) at 500 feet, and most likely smelled beyond that range!! If you flew yesterday, did you take a direct home, or are you back in Vancouver/Seattle today?? Because it's supposed to hit 98 degrees here today and if I wanted to be that hot and miserable, I'd be living somewhere in the rest of the country instead of boring old Washington state which has only 2 things going for it - the lack of state income tax and the mild temperatures (while the rest of the country is sweltering, we're usually somewhere in the 70's, sitting in front of our TVs watching the national weather forecast/reports with smug looks on our faces)....okay, end of rant! If you're here today, my sympathies! As for supportive husbands, I'm divorced.....need I say more???!!!!! Safe rest of trip!! We need pictures!!!

Anonymous said...

Yes, I would have DONE the same exact thing and my husband would have been mortified!!! But, if I didn't make those requests I would have complained to him the entire time I was eating and that would have upset him just as much. So, at least I would have been happy after he was completely mortified. And after all, it is all about me!!!

Kathy in PA!

Cate said...

After years in the land of Tillamook Cheese, I can do no other...to the point that I can't even do mac and cheese out of a box anymore.

Sad, sad, sad.

Karen said...

1. There is definitely a difference between real cheese and pasteurized processed cheese food. Cheese food is not fit for human consumption and should be banned from all delis in my opinion.
2. d: all of the above
3. d: all of the above again
4. No, I would not consider it rude to request the cinnabon be hot as advertised.
5. I don't have a husband, but if I did, I would expect him to step right up there and tell the worker himself that Princess wants her bun warm and request 30 seconds in the microwave because he loves his Princess and her very happiness is his to ensure above all things.

Anna said...

Just the fact that the fake stuff has to be labeled as cheese "food" should give you a clue right there. If it were any good, would they have to tell us that it's food? Although I agree with Claire about the mac and cheese - my mom does a mixture of Velveeta and cheddar in hers and everyone goes crazy over it.

Abbie said...

OK...I have to call at least SOME of these posters bluffs. I believe that Kristie doesn't like processed cheese food, because she doesn't like lots of things. But I think most of you just don't want to be the only kid in the lunchroom eating hot lunch and hearing all the other kids say, "Eww...are you gonna eat that?!" And yes, I did eat hot lunch. And I LOVED it!!!

But about the cheese:

1) The simple question of "is there a difference between real cheese and cheese food" kind of makes me snort a bit. Come on...everybody knows the answer to that!

2) I find cheese FOOD to be fake, slimy, and necessary. Let me explain...REAL cheese DOES NOT MELT! Velveeta, in my opinion, is ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY for grilled cheese sandwiches, mac & cheese, and NACHO CHEESE DIP! If you people are using cheddar cheese for your nacho cheese dip then I totally pass. Because then it's all clumpy...and stringy...and oily. Blick. In fact, you should invite me to the party where you serve that and it will be a feel good day for me because I won't eat any of it and I can feel proud, for once.

Now...can I just eat a hunk of it? Absolutely not, I would gag. Would I put a slice of it on a deli sandwich? Absolutely not, I would gag. I prefer provolone on almost every sandwich. But if I've got a basket of tortilla chips waiting to take a dip in a nice hot MELTED bowl of cheese mixed with salsa, jalapenos, black beans, rotel, etc...I've gotta have the Velveeta.

And for all of you who really loathe it like you say you do...I'll invite you over sometime when I make a batch and you can feel proud about avoiding the chips and cheese at the party. :)

Just my 2 cents.

Abbie :)

laughing mommy said...

Not a fan of processed cheese food... cause the name scares me. But my brother in law calls Squeeze Cheese "Party in a Can".

jadine said...

Hiya Kristie,

These are questions that must be answered. You know, for the good of wo/mankind.

1. Yes, there is a difference! One's fake, the other's cheese. Reminds me of when I sold popcorn at a theatre...we were told to tell people that the "Golden Topping" was margarine.

2. d. All of the above

3. d. All of the above

4. Yes, for 30 seconds. Yum :)

5. Yes. Totally and completely. Especially the embarrassed look and slinking.


Anonymous said...

1. HELL YA! Major difference!!!
2. All of the above ... it's making me gag just thinking about eating fake cheese!
3. ALL OF THE ABOVE! *and maybe more*
4. a lukewarm cinnabon?!?!?! Isn't there a law about that?!?!?!
5. If he knows what's good for him ... SUPPORT!

I just flew in to visit my parents and had my own little lunch in airport issue. I went to TGIFridays since everything else in the terminal was unrecognizable and I couldn't think about eating airport sushi. I felt it safe to order a burger and fries ... I didn't even have time to pull out my cellphone and send a text message by the time it was sitting in front of me at the table. Let's just say ... well done does not equal mushy pink, unmelted (probably fake) cheese and a cold bun. I was scared to send it back so I had a nice expensive lunch of fries and a diet coke!

:) Jen in Texas

Amy said...

The knowledge you possess is simply amazing to me! I can't see why ANYONE would want to think differently than YOU!

(How's that for sucking up?)


PS...I'm with ya on this one all the way tho...for real.

Renee and Keith said...


Perkasie, PA isn't anywhere near as exciting as cruising Alaska with dear friends!!!

lizinsumner said...

ohnoooooooooooooo....you mean the golden topping ISN'T really butter???? Every movie in my future has just been ruined....AND, I've got 10 AM tickets to the new Harry Potter in 3D at the IMAX this Saturday {{{sob}}}....

PS - she's right - real cheese doesn't melt well.

Sandra said...

You are absolutely right on the money with the cheese -- not all things are created equal! And, what's more, often times, when it comes to deli meat and cheese, the more you pay for it, the better it is! My husband HATES that! I laughed out loud when I saw your questions #5 because he would soooo make the "high maintenance" comment and walk away so as not to be seen with me. Oh, and definitely have them nuke the Cinnabon. Mmmmm, may have to get myself one of those today.

Stephanie said...

You are right on Kristie!
In my family, we always called it Feese (fake + cheese) and it is disgusting! Especially if it gets next to a wet tomato or a piece of lettuce - DON'T GET ME STARTED!
I have been a charter memeber of CSOAI for many years and proudly carry the banner to recruit others. Stand your ground on this one, girlfriend!

Donna said...

Hmm. Since I am lactose intolerant I can assure you, there is no difference in THAT category between real cheese and aforementioned cheez food. Both will send me running to the nearest WC. That said, before I developed my intolerance for dairy, I always refused the white cheez food slices at Subway because, well, there was just nothing cheesy about them.

As for the Cinnabon, I would go for lukewarm over nuclear-melt-your-tongue-so-you-can't-taste-for-a-week.

I have issues with the Anchorage airport because I had the saddest good-bye of my life there!. The summer after the Mighty Hunter and I got married we got to exploit his graduate assistantship in the Artic and spend a week in and around Anchorage and Seward (probably including the very same puky fjord tour you took). I could hardly stand to leave the guy, knowing it would be three more weeks before he came home. Shoot, it makes me tear up just thinking about it!

Hilary said...

1. Yes- There is a big difference.

2. I'll answer on be half of your and my sake-- D (big fat D)

3. D again!

4. Cinnabons are supposed to be hot aren't they?


5. Since I don't have a husband I wouldn't know. I'm sure he was very supportive Kristie ;)

Beverly said...

Fake cheese! YUCK!

I have to tell you that not long after we moved into the house (many years ago) my neighbor and best friend mentioned that her daughter (two at the time) would only eat cheese and drink juice. I told her that I thought that was fine...then I saw that it was fake cheese! Oh MY!

No, I didn't ask to see the juice!

(We don't even eat mac and cheese form a box...that dehydrated fake cheese!)

M, Ms. R, Mom, Auntie M, Marey said...

...my favorite is jalapeno cheese...real cheese- the hotter the better :)

I was waiting for more airport blog...if you need to feel good about yourself, just hang out in an airport for a short length of time...

Hope you had the time of your life...I can't wait to see photos!

Daisy Duke said...

Let me know when the real cheese party is. I'll bring triple creme brie, becuase if you are going to go for it, I say go the whole way.

The only thing worse than fake cheese is when you are given a prepackaged sandwich with fake cheese, weird meat, and fake mayo. That has been chilled overnight and is now "perfect" to serve to an unsuspecting & captive group of people. The thought makes me shudder.

(And? Cinnobon? Probably one of the greatest inventions of all time. I'm so glad the only one near me is separated by airport security, because if not I'd be a disaster.)

Anonymous said...

Do you people not make grilled cheese sandwiches???? You cannot get block cheese to melt between two pieces of bread. The only time I ever use slice cheese is to make grilled cheese. I use Velveeta to make cheese dips and I use block cheese for everything else. Heck if the worst thing I ever feed my kids is slice cheese grilled on bread then I'm doing ok.


GAL said...

I'm beginning to worry that you didn't make it out of the airport. I keep checking to hear of your reunion with the kiddos.

Anonymous said...

Hey Kristie! I thoroughly agree with everything you did! I am normally quite low-key, but my DH has learned that if I am about to state my case emphatically, it is best for him to vacate the premises immediately. He may roll his eyes (trust me, he dares not do it in my line of vision) if he thinks it's something insignificant, but he's always happy to have me on his side when the going gets tough and someone in our family has to go on the warpath! Thanks for letting me live vicariously through your vacation, I feel so refreshed :)
Debbie E.
Peachtree City, GA

Anonymous said...

oh, one more thing...the Target here serves Cinnabon prezels. Basically a pretzel with a mini-cinnabon in the middle, and yes the fabulous cream cheese. I've only had one, but it was a treat to remember.
Debbie E. again

Natalie said...

Are you back? Just worrying about flying along with you.

Processed cheese. UGH and ICK. Why oh why does this have to be a crave item of steroidal children everywhere? I'm hoping this goes away ALONG WITH FINN'S LAST STEROIDS!!!

Welcome home!

Anonymous said...

OK....is anyone else worried that Kristie has not written since she's been back from Alaska? I have two thoughts......One, she is so tired and so glad to be back with the children that she hasn't dared to touch the keyboard, or two, that she's still sitting on the tarmac in Alaska waiting for the plane to take off. I'm thinking maybe a moose or a six-foot elk is giving birth on the runway and they have to wait to take off?????

Leeann said...

Good God, woman, where the hell are you?
I hope everything is okay....

Pam Doughty said...

So, yes, I join along with everyone else and wonder where in the heck you are??? Because, no matter how crazy the kids might have driven you after your joyous reunion, you WOULD have certainly turned that into blog fodder in a heartbeat. (am I right, or am I right????). And I DO actually use REAL cheese in grilled cheese sandwiches and it works just fine. Mac and cheese and nacho dip.. no. High maintenance? No, you just want what you paid for, and preferably with a smile. That's called "customer service", and there is no reason why you shouldn't expect it. Finally, at Lighthouse last week, Joshua made it clear that he wanted a turkey sandwich with YELLOW processed cheese, not white. Now THAT is one time that you do your best to make it happen; not sure that we could, but I made sure the request was relayed to the folks in charge.
Hope all is going well; we are in Destin, still chasing crabs, but missing our Lighthouse buddies. It was awesome.... :<)

Anonymous said...

my husband would have been soooooooooo non supportive of me. I once caught him making a grilled cheese with cheese whiz. BLECH

Pam in Michigan said...

OK, now I'm just getting worried. I find myself checking in way more than is socially acceptable, just to see if Kristie has posted. How is everyone else filling this void?

On the cheese front, my kids are completely and utterly opposed to cheese that isn't "real". Velveeta is NOT AN OPTION! I didn't know there were any other types available until I was married! I make their grilled cheese using shredded cheese. It works great and you can get creative with the different varieties. It melts much easier than trying to slice from a brick of real cheese.

Kristie, hope everything is OK. I'm leaving my computer right now, but I'll be back in like 6 minutes to check again! :)

Pam in Michigan