GIFTED PROGRAM RECALL

I’m not sure if it’s the sunshine, or sunscreen vapors, or chlorine, or lake water, but some part of this vacation appears to be sucking brain cells directly out of Kendrie’s head. This weekend my nephew had a ball game and afterwards our entire family went out to eat. The six grown ups sat at one end of the table, and the seven grandkids sat at the other end, eating and laughing and (believe it or not) behaving pretty well. After the meal was over, Kendrie needed to go to the restroom, so I went with her and we had the following conversation:

Kristie: “Are you having a fun time with your cousins?”

Kendrie: “Who?”

Kristie: “Your cousins.”

Kendrie: “Who?”

Kristie, wondering if maybe she’d been out in the sun too long: “Your COUSINS. You know, the four boys sitting with us at the table?”

Kendrie: “Oh, those aren’t my cousins, those are my friends.”

Kristie (laughing slightly): “Well, of course they’re your friends, but they’re also your cousins.”

Kendrie: “How’s that?”

Kristie: “Well, since Aunt Kelly and I are sisters, then all of our kids are cousins.”

Kendrie: “Says who? I don’t think that’s right.”

Kristie: “Of course it’s right. If two sisters or two brothers, or a brother and a sister, have kids, those kids are cousins. That’s the way it works.”

At this point, Kendrie gave me the most Oh-my-gosh-you-are-so-stupid-look, practically snorted in derision, and said in a completely condescending tone: “Uh, yeah. That’s only if you’re JEWISH!!!”

Whaaaaaaaaaaat????

We’ve got to end our vacation before the gifted teacher at her school rescinds the offer.