Saturday, September 08, 2007

I’ll give you Two Dollars for that

Our Father, who art at the community yard sale, help me not to feel offended if someone says my crap isn’t worth the price I have on it. If they’re shopping at yard sales, chances are good they’re reselling it on ebay or at consignment stores and it’s nothing personal. Forgive me the grime I stirred up going through my old things in the garage, for thine is the kingdom of dust motes and sneezing. Give me the patience to remember some people simply love the thrill of bargaining, and it’s not necessarily because they are cheap bastards. So forgive me my trespasses for thinking they are. Lead me not into the temptation of my neighbor’s sale, but deliver me straight to the bank if I actually make any money. Thine is also the kingdom where the kids cooperate running their donut stand, the power if they do it without fighting over who gets to pour the juice, and the glory if they in fact make a profit at it.

Most of all, deliver me from the hell of the garage sale, forever and ever, or at least until this time next year.
Amen.

8 comments:

Amy said...

I will be saying the same prayer in a couple weeks. I'm doing mine to raise money for two local families that have battled childhood cancer. Being that it's a fundraiser, I hope people aren't to cheap!!
Happy belated birthday!!
I LOVE the YouTube and I posted it on my blog.
have a great weekend!!

The Nanny said...

hahahahahahaha

Lisa said...

Oh I wish we 'did' garage sales. you see the odd advert here and there but its not really a popular way of getting rid of unwanted stuff. Do you do car boot (trunk?) sales? Thats the big thing in England. Put all your stuff in your car, and drive to a field where fifty or so other cars also arrive, then heap all your stuff on to a table and on the floor and wait for the crowds to arrive. Sunday morning is the biggie where I live, the local football ground is heaving from around 6am in the summer and 8am in the winter. Good luck anyway, hope you make some money! Love and prayers

Anonymous said...

Okay! That has to be a top favorite entry! Yuo are hilarious! May you make TONS of money.....Amen!

Denise

laughing mommy said...

I hate garage sales. The people who come are always professional theives. They say... I'm taking these two .25 items plus that $25 treadmill, and these two $1 throw pillows and this $3 tupperware. Here is $5.50. Gotta run!

And if I'm distracted by another "customer" (theif) I don't notice that they didn't pay $25 for the treadmill. It has happened to me every time I've had a garage sale. They are always in a hurry, and I would be too if I were STEALING stuff.

Frankly, I'd rather GIVE it to charity than have someone steal it from my garage sale.

Jen said...

Gotta love garage sales! My only complaint is the EARLY morning hours! Why can't we sell our *crapy* errr treasures at a decent time ... like 3PM??? I hope you made some money and didn't reinvest in other people's treasures ;)

Jeanette said...

Lauren wanted to wear Brayden's pink "witch" costume to church this morning. And I'm enjoying your books. We are both appreciating all your old crap! :)

Jennifer said...

I should have called you! I did a fundraiser garage sale this weekend for the Crisis home my step daughter went to. ( she is home doing greast!) and some lady STOLE from us!! I chased her down by grabbing onto her car door and banging on her window. Needless to say we did not get the $15 priced item back.

But I totally hear you on your post!! I will be putting off having another for quite some time.