Things I Learned Today

Updated to add: Mamasita, yes, of course invite me to your cabin! As long as it has electricity, heat in the winter, a/c in the summer, a functioning kitchen, and running water, I LOVE camping! It's tent-camping I don't "do". My rule is: If I have to get up in the middle of the night and put on shoes and grab a flashlight to go potty??? It's too rustic for me.

I actually enjoy hiking and nature and trees and wildlife and all that crap, if its in the right environment. My two recent visits to Alaska??? LOVED THEM! I want a cool, beautiful day where I wander aimlessly, dressed in comfy jeans and boots and plaid flannel, taking beautiful pictures of the breathtaking scenery. I like fishing, and nature walks, and four-wheeling ---- AS LONG AS THEY DON'T INVOLVE SWEATING!!
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I went as a chaperone with my daughter's entire 3rd grade on a field trip to Red Rock Canyon today. While there, I learned quite a bit ... both in general, and about myself personally. I thought I would share them with you. That's just how I roll.

1. Red Rock Canyon is a state park and "oasis" (if you believe the brochures) located in Oklahoma. More specifically, an outdoor nature-park type place, located in some kind of canyon, with walking trails and hiking trails and small cliffs and whatever other kind of outdoors-y crap you might like if you are into outdoors-y crap.

2. I am not into outdoors-y crap.

3. I do not like the outdoors.

4. I do not like humidity.

5. It rained this week, and was therefore humid. (see #4)

6. I do not like nature.

7. I do not like hiking.

8. I most emphatically do not like sweating.

9. Mainly, I do not like taking nature walks or hiking in the outdoor nature areas which cause me to sweat.

10. I do not like the way my bra feels when it is wet because it is sticking to my disgusting wet sweaty body.

11. I do not like bugs.

12. I do not like mud.

13. I do not like trees and shrubs and sticks and grass which are prickly and pokey and stick me in the legs.

14. I do not like to sweat.

15. I do not like climbing up hills. Or down hills. Or around or on or over or under any kind of hill.

16. I do not like when it has been raining and the ground is wet and slippery and I fall down with an expensive camera in my hand.

17. I do not like yelling at children to "Step back from the edge of the pond I said step back before you fall in for God's sake what part of step back do you not understand and if your 9-yr old rear falls in that water you better be able to swim is all I'm saying because I'm NOT coming in after you!!!"

18. I do not like balancing on skinny logs over mud puddles.

19. Did I mention I do not like sweating?

Here are a few things that I *DID* like today:

I liked watching my daughter play kickball with her classmates:



I liked watching her walk along the nature trail:



I liked watching how happy it make her to climb all over the boulders:



I liked watching her be silly, like the 9-year old she is:



I liked watching her cross rivers, streams, mud puddles:



Most of all, I liked loved, loved, loved with all my heart when she walked up to me on the trail, slipped her hand in mine, and told me how happy she was that I came on the trip.


It *almost* made the sweating worthwhile.

Almost.