Ok, seriously. I obviously got RIPPED OFF in elementary school! First I can’t spell, and now I find out I’m practically the only person in America who never learned the Nifty Fifty State song. Blaine, by the way, swears he doesn’t remember singing anything *before* the states, but does remember the “North, South, East, West, Oklahoma is the state we love the best” or whatever that part is at the end. Fine, whatever.
But I got gypped. I never won any cool coffeehouse bets, or passed a college geography test with flying colors, OR won a beer in a bar with this knowledge. The only time *I* ever got free beer was on Penny-Longneck night, if I found spare change in the parking lot. Thank goodness you kind people shared the Nifty Fifty YouTube link with me so I can at least learn it now. (Although you know I won’t, because the precious few brain cells I have left must be saved for high-impact learning like the new version of Photoshop and figuring out who got eliminated on Dancing With The Stars.)
It does make me wonder why my elementary school never taught us this song. It’s genius, I tell you, pure genius. I do remember learning the Mickey Mouse theme song in music class …. How is *that* important? It also makes me wonder if they’re teaching it now, or if I need to push to get it included on the curriculum. After all, Blaine and I worked our living situation pretty hard to get our kids in this same school district, and they’ll be starting there next month. Have I doomed them to a Nifty-Fifty-free life? Oh, the shame and horror if I have.
Well, I’m off to practice. Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas …. Something, something …. La-la-la- ….. some c states, and Delaware … then maybe Florida ….. God, I suck.