Tuesday, July 26, 2005


141 Days to Go

I find it hysterical that at a beach/lake/water-park place we visited in Ohio, with all kinds of slides and monkey bars and play equipment in the water, my kids enjoyed digging holes best. I’m not quite sure what type of architectural masterpiece they were going for, but I’m pretty sure it involved a moat and someplace for the plastic alligator to rest.

My perspective: Look at how creative my children are and how nicely they are playing with their little friend Anna.

The lifeguards’ perspective: Those damn kids got out every damn shovel and pail on the beach. It’ll take me HOURS to clean up tonight!

My perspective: Look how beautiful my son is.

Lifeguards’ perspective: Wow, doesn’t she ever feed that kid?

My perspective: I love to see my children learn about nature, even with an act as simple as letting wet sand slide through their fingers and enjoying the messiness and happiness of being a child.

Lifeguards’ perspective: First of all, Rogaine, anyone? And secondly, she dragged out all those buckets and shovels and now she’s happy playing with mud? I swear I am never having kids.

My perspective: Our last photograph of the day, showing us enjoying our vacation with all our friends in Ohio. They are such a cute group of kids!

Lifeguards perspective: Thank God, I think I heard that lady say it was the last picture of the day. Maybe that means this group of kids is going home now!

Kendrie’s perspective: Yep, that lake yesterday was fun. But this water park today? And particularly this wave pool? This is where it’s AT, baby!

Lifeguard's perspective: Ma’am, you cannot stand at the exit to the lazy river, trying to get a photo of your child, without being knocked down by the waves. If I have to blow my whistle at you again, I will remove you, and your zoom lens, from the pool.

Kendrie’s perspective: Wheeeeeee! Can I do this again??? Fun, fun, FUN!!! I bet if I take off my shoes and wear only my socks, I can go down this slide even faster!!! Wheeeeee!! Hey, wait, it’s getting dark. Does that mean giant mutant bugs will be coming out soon?

Kristie’s perspective: This isn’t really a perspective as much as it is a piece of advice. If you ever find yourself in a public park after dark … don’t. Beetles the size of Texas will attach themselves to your child’s foot and you will have to deal with a hysterical 5-yr old, try to figure out some way to get the beetle off her sock without knocking her to the ground (which I managed to do anyway), a 7-yr old who is, I swear, about to hyperventilate from fear of the giant beetle, an 8-yr old who starts crying just because everyone else is …. And I thought taking Kendrie to use the port-a-potty in the dark would be scary, geesh. I am not exaggerating, though. That mutant-freak bug should have been in a museum somewhere. My girlfriend Kim will vouch for me! But at least she and her kids remained calm!

One last perspective:

The little, bitty, stubble-like hairs I saw coming from the chest of the man at the public pool yesterday … when I realized he must shave his chest and was a few days past due … very funny looking.

The little, bitty, stubble-like hairs I saw coming out of Kendrie’s scalp yesterday, in between the huge bald patches she has …. Beautiful.

We are making the most of our last full week of summer and taking the kids to do a few fun things these next couple of days. I’ll update, and include pictures (imagine that) in a few days. Hope all of you have a great week in the meantime!


I’m sick of my mom spreading what little hair I have left around to look for new growth. For pete’s sake, you’d think she’d laid down sod or something, the way she keeps checking!

BEST PART ABOUT HAVING CANCER TODAY: It’s really going to happen on Thursday, although to be honest, I’m not even sure what it is. Something to do with the Atlanta Braves, and me getting to help cut a ribbon, and the great folks at CureSearch. Hmmm, when I know more, I’ll share it with you!

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