Splutter! Cough! Gag! Hwaaaack! Wow!!!

You know what that sound is? That’s the sound of me, nonchalantly and innocently going about my day, sitting in front of the computer, drinking something, la-de-da, minding my own business, eating something …. Oh, I don’t know …. Say, something like Milk Duds, perhaps, when suddenly a comment pops up on my blog that takes me totally by surprise and I wind up choking on my own spit.

Thanks to all of you for your kind comments on Kendrie’s latest fashion crime accessory. Suffice it to say, the hatred the entire Beatles band (except for John, of course) felt for Yoko is not even close to the hatred she feels for her headgear. I’m afraid, if her orthodontist is to be believed, however, that it’s unavoidable. She has a cross-bite, an under-bite, a too-small palate, and crooked teeth. She got the always-fun expander right before Christmas Break and we cranked that bad boy open every night for two weeks, so she now has a lovely gap between her two front teeth. The headgear is an attempt, like someone said in the comment section, to correct the under bite without resorting to surgery. She wears it in increasingly longer increments each day after school (no way on earth would I make the poor child wear that monstrosity out in public) until she is able to wear it for five or six hours at a stretch …. Then she’ll begin wearing it at night. She’s already extracted the promise from her father and me that she can skip any night that involves a sleepover, either here or at a friend’s house. According to the literature, skipping one night equals a loss of four night’s worth of correction ….. wow. We might need to re-think that.

Anyway, this is all “Phase One”, and is basically the prep work to get her ready for the all-out braces she’ll wear in a few years when her permanent teeth have all come in. Brayden also went through Phase One and is now waiting on her permanent teeth for braces. Kellen was able to skip Phase One, but the Grand Canyon gap between his front teeth, plus the fact he is genetically mutated and was born without his permanent upper incisor B’s, means braces are definitely in his future as well. So pretty much our family is an orthodontist’s worst nightmare. Or greatest windfall, depending on your perspective.

But anyway! That’s not what made me choke on my own saliva. I was reading the comments from all of you, commiserating and flash-backing to your own orthodontic nightmares (for the record, I had braces to correct the same gap as Kellen, then wore a retainer to correct a cross bite, but never had full-out braces. Hence the reason my bottom teeth are crooked to this day. I like to think it gives me character. Truth is, I hate the dentist so much that NO WAY would I go to the trouble to correct it.)

And suddenly one of the comments was signed, “All my best to Kendrie, thanks for reading my book, Sandy Humphrey.”

Holy cow, she’s a real-live actual author, signing in here on my site! You can see for yourself that I have one of her books listed in my sidebar under the “currently reading” section. And she signed MY blog?!?!

Now, I don’t know this person personally (person personally, does that even make sense??) and I’m sure her publishing house has some kind of automatic search engine that turns up any site with her name on it, which led her here (much like my blog story about my child-hood friend Steve, my lab partner who threw up on frog-dissection day, who is now the Chief Freaking Financial Officer for Sonic Corporation, turned up on *their* search engines … sorry about that, Steve.) But still, how cool that she took the time to actually look at Kendrie’s picture and leave a note of encouragement?

So, turn about being fair play, and what have you, I thought I’d give you guys a quick plug for her book(s).

I saw a recommendation for Ms. Humphrey’s book “Hot Issues, Cool Choices” in a parenting magazine. The subtitle is “Facing Bullies, Peer Pressure, Popularity, and Put-Downs”, which I thought might facilitate some helpful conversations with Brayden, now that she’s in middle school. Thank GOODNESS we're not having any of those issues, but you can never be too prepared, right? When I went to Amazon to order the book with the Amazon gift card I won on Dad Gone Mad’s site (yippee!) their search engine suggested her other books as well. She has books titled, “It’s Up to You … What Do You Do?” and “If You Had To Choose, What Would You Do?” Some are geared to younger kids, some to older. Each book contains 25 stories of moral, ethical, social dilemmas that kids find themselves in, and then questions to promote discussion with your own children.

A few years back we had a book of questions for kids, some funny, some insightful, some thought-provoking, some silly. We took turns asking questions and giving answers every night at dinner and enjoyed ourselves. When I realized these books of Ms. Humphrey’s would allow me to expand on that concept, I bought four of her books and received them last week.

We started with the “youngest” “What Would You Do” book and I must say, our family has greatly enjoyed them. The chapters we’ve read so far at dinner each night discuss real-live, ACTUAL possible scenarios for kids in today’s climate. Not “what you would do if you found a million dollars?”, but a more realistic possibility, like “what would you do if you saw a $20 bill fall out of a person’s pocket?” …. Or, “what would you do if you saw a $20 bill fall out of a person’s pocket and your best friend grabbed it and wanted to spend it?” Other topics include school scenarios, bullying, peer pressure, friends, perceptions, etc.

What I like about these books is that the scenarios are presented in a non-biased way. The story is told, and then questions are posed at the end of each story for parents to discuss with their kids. “Right” and “wrong” aren’t crammed down anyone’s throat, and it really lets parents promote their own values and opinions without being preachy.

So far our family has discussed how to be nice to a new student when your best friend hates them, how to be a good loser, the importance of chores, and is it really stealing if you don’t get caught? I tried really, really hard to smoothly turn the chore story into a comparison of why it’s important for our kids do actual chores here at our house, but alas, I’m not sure it worked.

Anyway, I highly recommend this author, Sandra McLeod Humphrey, and these books. At twenty-five stories in a book, with the four books I bought, I figure we’ve got enough material to last until April or May. Maybe by THEN my kids will be more willing to do chores.

Nawwwwww, I didn’t think so either.