tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post7727244254895812935..comments2023-07-22T04:25:04.122-05:00Comments on Not Quite What I Had Planned: Poor SportsKristiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18325715096763265816noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-35744469220823501812009-04-07T09:25:00.000-05:002009-04-07T09:25:00.000-05:00I agree- grownups totally need to set a better exa...I agree- grownups totally need to set a better example. Glad the A team ended with the same score against the team you played. They need a reality check.Trish in Leesburg, VAnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-16651791197053349402009-04-07T09:07:00.000-05:002009-04-07T09:07:00.000-05:00OK - sorry - had to post one more comment. I went...OK - sorry - had to post one more comment. I went back and read all the comments posted and I have to say that every sports experience does NOT have to be crappy!<BR/><BR/>I am the parent of a 19 year old son who is in college on a FULL scholarship due to his club soccer experience. YES - it does happen and we are living proof that some competitive leagues are well run and have a lot of success stories. Did we spend a lot of money over a 4 year period of time for him to play HIGH level soccer, yes. Am I paying for college now? NO. LOL - I've already paid it. <BR/><BR/>My son now plays Division I soccer and still loves soccer. Shoot - we drove up to Maryland last weekend to see his college team play and had a marvelous time.<BR/><BR/>His club experience was awesome, with great parents & a wonderful coach. SO I must tell some of the earlier posters, not all competitive sports teams/coaches can be painted with the same brush and like everything else in life... what works for one family might not work for another family, but it doesn't make it wrong or EVIL. <BR/><BR/>JMHO!!Stephanie D.https://www.blogger.com/profile/13257297475376315303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-48561082147787732522009-04-07T08:58:00.000-05:002009-04-07T08:58:00.000-05:00OK - I am screaming with laughter b/c you know I'v...OK - I am screaming with laughter b/c you know I've lived this life for the last 10 years! I'm so glad that Kellen had a good time and believe me when I say that you WILL miss these times when they are gone. (Think Trace Adkins' song, "You're gonna miss this"). I so enjoyed the out of town tourneys and wish that I had some of that time back - win or lose! :)Stephanie D.https://www.blogger.com/profile/13257297475376315303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-87594938805033980062009-04-06T23:14:00.000-05:002009-04-06T23:14:00.000-05:00Know this story well from football (hubby coaches ...Know this story well from football (hubby coaches high school, and son just finished playing college and is now helping coach) - it can be maddening!!!<BR/><BR/>Really have enjoyed following your story, and we're sharing an award -<BR/>http://thesuitelifeoflucyandethel.blogspot.com/2009/04/straw-wrappers-awards-and-prayers.html<BR/><BR/>LucyLucy and Ethelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01034416537494911411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-12476607096527955112009-04-06T21:56:00.000-05:002009-04-06T21:56:00.000-05:00Kids learn sportsmanship from the parents AND the ...Kids learn sportsmanship from the parents AND the coaches. When you are fortunate enough to get a coach who believes in good sportmanship and that sports are supposed to be "gasp" fun then you have won half the battle. Because usually the die hard parents won't want to be on that team! Congrats to Kellen and his team for doing so well!jbajhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05584985632896007253noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-39081342370135429572009-04-06T21:21:00.000-05:002009-04-06T21:21:00.000-05:00Urgh....I remember the time my daughter (age 6) ha...Urgh....I remember the time my daughter (age 6) had to take the field against an all boys team (it was a tournament..we usually played girls) with the parents shouting over and over "Kick their butts"...and they did. We pulled our girls before one got seriously hurt due to their aggressive play. I wasn't sure whether to cry or open a serious can of "mamma whoop a#@.Bubba&SistersMomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06085926860256415153noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-21868569550779873852009-04-06T16:27:00.000-05:002009-04-06T16:27:00.000-05:00We had one of those days in U7 REC!! Not sure wher...We had one of those days in U7 REC!! Not sure where they found a 6-year-old who was a foot taller than everybody else and had the coordination of a competitive player, but their coach left him in at forward all four quarters despite the fact that they were ahead by 4 goals (not that anybody keeps score in our league...) and we spent 95% of the game within 20 feet of our own goal. He took out my son and another player with balls that were kicked as hard as I could kick one. And when we replaced our keeper with a very inexperienced kid (after the other keeper took the shot to the breadbasket), our new keeper, not understanding what the coach wanted him to do, put the ball down. As he did so the opposing coach screamed at Goliath to get it, which he promptly did and screamed it right by our goalie, who had not even turned around yet. Did I mention they are SIX????? Didn't help that our referee was all of about 12 years old. The other coach pretty much led him around by the nose. Sad.Donnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06571931282231386159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-65554042593397550332009-04-06T13:01:00.000-05:002009-04-06T13:01:00.000-05:00This is why I kept my boys on rec teams. The compe...This is why I kept my boys on rec teams. The compeptitive league is just that, competitive. <BR/><BR/>Unfortunately, rough play and yellow cards are part of the game. One of my friends that had kids in the competitive league told me that if her kids didn't get a yellow card in every game, they didn't feel like they were trying hard enough. Wait until Kellen is in the 16-18 year-old age group. The roughness sometimes follows them out to the parking lot. Many of the kids drive themselves to the game, so their parents aren't there to calm things down.<BR/><BR/>Sad to say, even at 11, there are parents thinking, "only 6 more years before they'll be looking for college scholarships". In our area, you can't get on a high school team unless you've played competitive. Of those kids, only a few get picked for the varsity team and even fewer get college scholarships. Parents know this and they want to give their kid every advantage early on.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-82402571506481448832009-04-06T12:47:00.000-05:002009-04-06T12:47:00.000-05:00OOPs, it was supposed to be "it was one of the wor...OOPs, it was supposed to be "it was one of the worst." Not "I". Good heavens, I would rather be hit with lightning than be the loud mouth fool at a game!<BR/>Tammy in OhioAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-68145342729933344482009-04-06T12:45:00.000-05:002009-04-06T12:45:00.000-05:00Ahh, competitive sports! We have a love/hate rela...Ahh, competitive sports! We have a love/hate relationship with it all. We played a team that did not speak english and WOW was that interesting. They were telling our boys off in some other language that we just did not get. I was one of the worst. It is good to know you are with a great group of kids who enjoy each other on and off the field. Glad the hotel was a redeeming factor. <BR/>Oh, and I am secretly glad the other obnoxious boys were beat. A little humility never hurts.<BR/>Tammy in OhioAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-50633716477829247172009-04-06T11:19:00.000-05:002009-04-06T11:19:00.000-05:00Some things never change...all three of my kids pl...Some things never change...all three of my kids played competitive soccer in Texas and Georgia. It was the same in both states - thankfully not all of the time, and not on all the teams that my kids played on. It is hard to remain the grown up when you are faced with grown ups that are acting like obnoxious children - and yes, a lot of times the apple does not fall far from "that" tree. And I completely understand the feeling from other parents valuing what their kids are doing over yours. My favorite memory from my son's soccer team experience was that he initially was on a team like your sons - the "B" team. Those boys, for the most part were great, and encouraged each other. Over the course of 5-6 years, the kids that truly didn't have the want or skill dropped off, our kids got better (thanks to good coaching and our boys' determination and improving skill), and kids from other "A" teams came over because they got tired of the drama and abusiveness of some of the "A" teams out there. They developed into an excellent team of their own. Stick to your guns - the boys that truly love the sport will continue to improve with the help of good coaching and parent support. And like you said - they are only 11 years old - there is so much development that is going to take place and some boys will surprise you (and themselves) as they grow, develop, mature and improve. On another note, I used to just roll my eyes at the parents that had to put their kids on the best teams, because they were concerned about scholarships. Incredible. Hang in there and try to close your eyes and turn a deaf ear to the bad. It is all about the love of the sport - whatever it is.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-56762638745036824922009-04-06T10:04:00.000-05:002009-04-06T10:04:00.000-05:00What a great post Kristie.... the "A" team losing...What a great post Kristie.... the "A" team losing to the same team, with the same score as the "B" team..... TOO, TOO Funny.... the cherry on top to a great weekend that you guys will probably never forget.Dianna in Louisiananoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-67023729319465471142009-04-06T09:11:00.000-05:002009-04-06T09:11:00.000-05:00My children are not allowed to play team sports. A...My children are not allowed to play team sports. As a family we do many other sports and activities though. We chose to not deal with being told where we needed to be and missing out on family activities due to games and practices. Many of our friends live and die by what their kids coaches dictate. Weekends and vacations are sacred to us and we have fun. Its nice to be able to pick up and go away for a weekend without worrying about who needs to be where. And my kids love not being tied down like their friends.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-22631372829592365542009-04-06T08:30:00.001-05:002009-04-06T08:30:00.001-05:00At Kellen's age, it SHOULD still be about having f...At Kellen's age, it SHOULD still be about having fun. Society forces today's kids to grow up WAY too early and that's contributing to all kinds of problems.<BR/><BR/>Thank goodness you and the rest of the parents on Kellen's team are on the same page with this.Cindihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05223695299377158162noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-91096233601257702432009-04-06T08:30:00.000-05:002009-04-06T08:30:00.000-05:00This is why my kids play rec sports. All the fun t...This is why my kids play rec sports. All the fun that the "serious" players have without all of the insanity and travel. My kids play for excercise, for learning about being on a team, for love of the game. Of course I have no delusions that any of them will be financing college or a dream home for me off their athletic prowness.<BR/><BR/>So many parents have taken something great (kids sports) and ruined it. And it isn't just ball sports. You should check out the dance moms one day for a real eyefull. And don't even get me started on cheer moms!<BR/>RitaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-85906082488638061882009-04-06T08:25:00.000-05:002009-04-06T08:25:00.000-05:00Well said- I am sure this is a hot topic!I agree w...Well said- I am sure this is a hot topic!<BR/>I agree with those that said you should see about getting your registration fee back.<BR/>I can picture Kellen smiling and having a great time despite all the "drama!"Alisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03820262717838528113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-60971610007957943632009-04-06T07:45:00.000-05:002009-04-06T07:45:00.000-05:00As a former soccer parent and soccer board member ...As a former soccer parent and soccer board member for 3 years, let me suggest: <BR/><BR/>Call the field that hosted the tournament and demand your registration fee back. I know each tournament is different, but registration fees are always a few hundred dollars at the least and if your team had made a mistake (like forgetting your passes, or getting stuck somewhere and missing a game) there would be a fine, possibly of several hundred dollars. <BR/><BR/>DebAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-46761159233131686752009-04-06T07:29:00.000-05:002009-04-06T07:29:00.000-05:00If it makes you feel better, I'll share a time whe...If it makes you feel better, I'll share a time when I was not a good winner. Although I mainly kept it to myself, since I was in public (I just told Mark). Austin's school, BMS, recently hosted some middle school math tournament that had schools from all around middle GA. I was happier that P. Middle (where most of his rec football team friends go to school) beat the pants off FMMS and MCMS (I'm using the abbreviations but you will be able to figure them out) than I was about how his team did. I hated the snotty attitudes we got when people find out that Austin plays rec ball in P and felt very vindicated for the entire city! How immature is that?cakeburnettehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02405378363107324973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-39336573170784387072009-04-06T06:28:00.000-05:002009-04-06T06:28:00.000-05:00Now that's the biggest difference between a kid wh...Now that's the biggest difference between a kid who plays the sport because they love it and a kid who plays because their parent loves it. My kid plays what you would call a "B" league simply because she doesn't want to spend her whole weekend travelling...and am I ever ok with that :) <BR/><BR/>Bridget from CanadaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-88754013105808470522009-04-06T06:01:00.000-05:002009-04-06T06:01:00.000-05:00Had to laugh at this.. and hope you didn't lose to...Had to laugh at this.. and hope you didn't lose too much sleep over it.. Those parents might need a little look in the mirror, and they can't be offended by the truth. Maybe they don't know what they are doing??<BR/><BR/>I have seen first hand those attitudes.. especially when my son was playing on the A team for baseball. The older he got, the worse it got, and when he was 12 and was HUMILIATED by the coach (and a couple of other players)at a minor mistake he made in a game..we just pulled him from that team. There were plenty of extra kids to play (the 'benchsitters' who never got to play - one of them must have been thrilled!) so it didn't hurt the team at all.. and we had spoken to the coach multiple times about the language he used with all of the kids. Some parents seemed willing to put up with the abuse so that they could brag that their kids were on this elite team. We just wanted our son to play the game he loved. We waited too long to make the switch for him,it just wasn't fun anymore.. and now he doesn't even play.<BR/><BR/>Do you read Suburban Turmoil? I loved the story about the competitiveness on her daughters soccer team last spring.. I think the kids were three or four!?<BR/><BR/>Love your blog.. keep the stories coming!<BR/><BR/>How's Blaine feeling?Rosemarynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-23613300918909569362009-04-06T00:10:00.000-05:002009-04-06T00:10:00.000-05:00I am so not a good 'sporting mom' because of thing...I am so not a good 'sporting mom' because of things just like this. Everything you said and thought was completely justified and very well written. <BR/><BR/>And extra brownie points for raising a son that can see the big picture:)Stefunkchttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09637719525041374238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-21917572248858688672009-04-05T22:29:00.000-05:002009-04-05T22:29:00.000-05:00I have two travel volleyball players -- a 10 yo an...I have two travel volleyball players -- a 10 yo and a 13 yo. One has had a "learning to play and not winning games season" while the other has had a "win a game, lose a game, win a game" season. Frustrating on both counts. I will say that volleyball parents seem less stressed than other sports. Very supportive of both teams on the court.Musings from Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13252283843903445777noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-26706507865411203442009-04-05T22:07:00.000-05:002009-04-05T22:07:00.000-05:00I totally understand where you are coming from. Wh...I totally understand where you are coming from. Where in Arkansas was the tournament? Only reason I ask..we used to live in Conway and I still have a soft spot in my heart for all that is Central Arkansas. Glad y'all had a great time in the end!<BR/><BR/>Claire in TexasAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-39918908015857707392009-04-05T21:38:00.000-05:002009-04-05T21:38:00.000-05:00It's all about the fun, the support, the social in...It's all about the fun, the support, the social interactions. It's about self learning. Parents seem to ruin it, seem to not show a good example and then truly show their immaturity. <BR/>Which parent in their right mind would exchange insults with an 11 yo? from a different team? and get satisfaction from that? <BR/>It's good that your son feels he had a good time. Later in life, this will be a funny story, all the work getting there and then playing against the wrong division.<BR/><BR/>For you parents who show support to your kids' sports, drive them hours, put them up etc.... etc... *that's* what matters most. Your 100% support, it is what will make your children feel like winners. It's rewarding too.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36095574.post-91755751880201677772009-04-05T21:18:00.000-05:002009-04-05T21:18:00.000-05:00Oh my! I can't believe they switched the teams an...Oh my! I can't believe they switched the teams and the brackets they were suppose to play in. But good for your boys in having fun. Believe it or not, I actually like out of town tournaments sometimes. It's like a mini vacation for me.The Traveling Yogihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13006993240317444809noreply@blogger.com